


Six Heartbreaks

by delictor



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Normal Life, Angst, Biracial Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I cried writing this, It'll prob piss you off every chapter, M/M, Sad with a Happy Ending, The ending isn't SUPER klance so read with caution, You've been warned, he's cuban and mexican, he's mixed in my story, it's lance's sister btw, lance is biracial technically, rip bc writing it was rough, shiro/oc for like a fraction of a second, tagging it just in case, there's eventual smut, vague happy ending, writing this story was rough
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-02
Updated: 2016-12-13
Packaged: 2018-08-28 13:17:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 47,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8447395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delictor/pseuds/delictor
Summary: Five times Lance broke Keith's heart and the one time Keith broke his.1) When we were ten and you kissed my cheek and I told you I didn't like boys.2) When we were seventeen and I accidentally asked you on a date and instead introduced you to Nyma.3) When we were nineteen and I cried on your shoulder because Nyma had left me and I said I was glad I found you, but only as my friend.4) When we were twenty-one and I gave you a blow job at your brothers wedding, went to a sex shop then I took your virginity in a hotel room and left in the middle of the night, saying I didn't remember a thing in the morning.5) When we were twenty-four and you told me you loved me... and I left.1) And the one time you broke mine by moving on with my--





	1. When We Were Ten

**Author's Note:**

> Prior to reading I would recommend checking [this post](http://bluemcclain.tumblr.com/post/152619132311/the-mcclain-family-reference-for-the-fic-six) for reference to all of Lance's relatives. But it's not necessary, I'll describe all the relatives throughout the story.

_When we were ten and you kissed my cheek and I told you I didn't like boys._

 

* * *

 

Lance still remembers the day Keith Shirogane moved in across the street.

He's outside playing with his older brother and sister, Milo and Mila in the sprinklers. They're screaming and laughing, running around, not a care in the world like any nine year old. It was summer, a burning hot July afternoon and Lance is the first to notice the car pull up to the empty house in front of theirs. The one that had had a _For Sale_ sign in the front yard for as long as Lance could remember. Then the large moving truck that followed it.

“Hey we're getting new neighbors.” Mila gasps, nearly tumbling into Lance but catching herself at the last second. Milo came up beside them seconds later, sprinklers now forgotten.

“About time, that house has been empty since Lance was a baby.” Milo adds in when he comes to a stop beside the both of them.

“Yeah I wonder if they have a kid my age!” Lance thought out loud, glancing up to his siblings who ruffled his soaked hair.

“Maybe, hopefully, then we don't have to deal with you all the time.” Milo cackles earning a stern _hey!_ from Lance and punch to the side. “Relax, little bro, let's go get changed and see if they have any kids _our_ age.” he adds, signaling between him and Mila.

Lance would've done that, would've waited for his two older siblings but Milo took far too long in the shower and Lance was an _impatient_ nine year old. So he found himself across the street in flip flops and his swim trunks and staring at the men unloading the moving truck. Following behind them as they carried a television inside, Lance peeked his head into the house and looked around the living room. It had two couches in it already and a little boy sitting on one of them. He was coloring, feet swinging, tongue peeking out at the corner of his mouth and... and was that a bowl haircut?

Lance broke into a loud fit of laughter.

Shooting to his feet, the boy's crayons scattered across the floor and his coloring book fell shut. “Mom! Mom, there's a stranger in the house!”

“Keith, I told you they're just the–oh, there is a stranger in the house.” a tall woman came out from the kitchen and suddenly Lance's laughter died down. “Oh my, um, are you lost?”

“Huh? No, I live across the street.” Lance answers with a shake of his still wet hair. “I just came over to see if you guys had a kid my age is all. And you do but his hair is funny.”

The boy, now known as Keith, reaches up gingerly to touch his hair and pouts. “What's wrong with my hair?”

“It looks like a bowl.” Lance deadpans and he could hear the woman giggling behind her palm. “I'm Lance by the way. I live across the street at the McClain household.” Lance grins, pointing to the door.

“Keith, why don't you go outside and play with Lance? Looks like he was playing in the sprinklers.” the boy seems to stare down his mom for a while before sighing and nodding. Lance stands in the doorway awkwardly for a minute before the woman clears her throat. “Lance would you like a juice box?”

Lance's face lights up right away and he nods eagerly as he follows her into the kitchen where he can see a couple of grocery bags set on the counters and being unloaded. She grabs a juice box from the fridge and hands it to Lance. It's odd looking, the box is clear and the juice inside looks a little bubbly. “What kind is this?”

“It's called Space Jam! It's grape flavored, Keith loves them because he says the aliens invented the juice box.” she laughs, helping Lance to open his juice. He takes a cautious sip and immediately his face lights up, it's the best grape juice he's ever had.

“This is great, where do you guys buy these?” he asks and she stifles a laugh.

“Normal grocery stores, they're still a pretty new brand so they might not be too popular around here yet.” she explains and Lance nods, drinking the juice in big gulps. By the time he's done with it Keith is padding into the kitchen in a pair of purple swim trunks, black tank top and purple flip flops.

“Ready.”

Lance chirps the whole way out of the house and down the street about the juice box. He comments that grape is his favorite and aliens  _most definitely_ invented juice boxes and Keith's face seems to light up.

“Aliens are real and anybody who says otherwise is a liar.” Keith finally comments, causing Lance to pause in his walk, stare at Keith for a fraction of a second then burst into laughter.

“Right! I learned in science class that space is so big and always growing so there's no way we're the only aliens out there, no way.” Lance sighs, glancing to the clouds then back to Keith.

“That's what I always say—wait did you call _us_ aliens?” Keith questions, eyebrows raising and head tilting to the side a bit. Lance, shrugs at the question and nods slowly.

“Well, yeah. We're aliens aren't we? I mean, not aliens to ourselves but if we were to find aliens out there then _we_ would be the aliens to them. Y'know?” Lance explains, walking into his yard and turning the sprinklers back on. He's already running through the water when Keith lets out a sharp gasp.

“You're right! I've never thought of it that way, but you're right!” he's shouting, sprinting through the sprinklers and colliding with Lance, knocking the both of them into the muddy grass in a fit of laughter. “You're right!”

“I'm always right,” Lance snorts, shoving Keith off him and sitting up, grin showing off his missing bottom tooth.

“I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship, Lance.” Keith laughs, hands slapping into the mud to grab some and toss at Lance who immediately tosses some back.

They play outside for a good hour before Keith is called back home and Mila finally comes outside to tell Lance the grass has had _more than enough water for a year_.

They meet up almost daily after that until school starts and they end up in the same class. Lance introduces Keith to Hunk, the neighbor who lives to the left of him and is considered his best friend from birth. Hunk is a grade above them so they only see him out of school but they all quickly become close friends. Keith's older brother, Shiro was the same age as Lance's older sister, Mila. They went to the same school and had a few classes together and Lance could still remember Mila gushing about Shiro to their mom.

_His hair is beautiful, Ma!_

_Have you seen the way he smiles? It melts my heart_.

His sister said some mushy, gushy things about Shiro and Lance was sure that was how a relationship between adults started. They _liked_ each other but Lance had never liked a girl before. He didn't want to, he thought love was _gross_ , who needed that when you had two amazing best friend like Hunk and Keith? He tells his younger brother Beto to never get feelings like Mila.

 

* * *

  

“Is Shiro gonna take us trick-or-treating?” Lance asks one afternoon while they all did homework at the Shirogane household. Lance was finishing his math homework when Keith shrugged.

“I don't know, Shiro says he's getting too old to go trick-or-treating, so I don't think he'd want to.”

“Well Mila told me to ask because she wants us all to go trick-or-treating together. You, me, Hunk, her, Milo and Shiro. I think she kind of wants it to be like a date with her and him.” Lance states, setting his pencil down and looking up at Keith.

“So? You'll have to ask Shiro if he's going, I can't control him.” Keith shrugs, all three boys jumping when said person walks in.

“Ask me what?”

“Um, Mila wants you to go trick-or-treating with all of us.” Hunk blurts out as Shiro takes a seat at the table with all of them.

There's no response for a minute and Lance quietly returns to his homework when Shiro finally speaks up. “Alright, sounds like it'll be fun. What's Mila dressing up as?”

“Um, I think she said a cat.”

“Then I'll be a dog.” Shiro chuckles, getting up and ruffling Keith's hair on his way out of the dining room.

“Does that mean Shiro is gonna fight my sister?” Lance asks and his only response is laughter from both Keith and Hunk.

Halloween goes smoothly. They all end up with a bag full of candies, Mila makes the _lamest_ attempt at holding Shiro's hand (Lance nearly gags when she pretends to be afraid of the haunted house with the full size candy bars) but he gives her props for trying. Especially when Shiro actually holds her hand. Clever.

By the end of the night Lance's skeleton make up is smeared over his face and Keith's dragon mask is long forgotten in his bag in favor of breathing and Hunk's halo is held in his hand rather than worn on his head. Milo had gone with his pumpkin idea but regretted it half way through the night when his arms got tired of being held up and over his puffy costume. Mila and Shiro had the most practical costumes. Mila with her all black clothes, tail tied to her hips, drawn on whiskers and cat headband while Shiro had on white clothes with brown patches, a dog tail hooked to the back of his pants, dog ears dangling over his hair and a pink nose.

They all go to the McClain house to trade their candies, Beto running up to greet them when they get there. According to their mom Beto was far too young to go trick-or-treating with the big kids just yet. While trading candies Lance notices Keith sitting unusually close to him, he noted but didn't comment on it. It was almost the way Mila was practically sitting in Shiro's lap on the couch. That night when Lance asked Mila why she acted that way around Shiro he learned what a crush was.

And he decided he didn't want any crushing going on around him. Ever.

 

* * *

  

Thanksgiving was a bit of a mess, at least, in Lance's opinion it was. A lot of his family members came to town, most of his family on both sides and... well that was _a lot_. And by a lot he meant his mom's 3 brothers, their wives and _all of their kids_. Too many for Lance to even try and count. And 2 of his dad's sisters, as well as his grandparents on both sides. All in all? The McClain household became packed. So packed he had to share a room with Mila and Milo while his dad's parents got his room and his mom's parents got Milo's room. His baby brother Beto and sister Yahira both stayed with their parents, their two rooms given to Lance's dad's sisters and the one real guest room they had given to Tio Beni, who got to town before his other uncles.

Lance spent most afternoons with his Tio Beni, his favorite uncle, or with his Mama Sandra learning to sew. It was something he loved doing, Mila and Milo often teasing him with the nickname _Tailor._ Not that he really minded the nickname, but the way his older siblings said the name always frustrated Lance.

The days before Thanksgiving Lance invited Keith over several times but Keith always had something come up until the day before Thanksgiving when he went over to the Shirogane house and asked for Keith.

“Why do you keep standing me up?” Lance huffs, staring at Keith as he sat at his desk, coloring. “It's Thanksgiving break, I know you don't have homework.”

“So?”

“So, I want you to come over and meet my family.” Lance replies, walking up to Keith to get a look at what he was coloring. Except Keith was quick to flip the drawing over and lean back in his chair.

“I don't like being around too many people, especially strangers.”

“But that's my family, they won't bite, I promise.” Lance states, holding his pinky out to Keith who shakes his head. “What if Shiro comes over with you? You guys aren't going anywhere for Thanksgiving, your mom and dad can come over too if you want. You guys can have Thanksgiving dinner with us!”

Keith doesn't say anything in response to that and Lance notices he seems to get more nervous than before. “Keith, buddy, what's wrong? Why are you stressing so bad over this?”

“I'm adopted.”

“Whoa, wait what? Really?”

“Yeah. My parents died when I was four and I got used to spending Thanksgiving with families that I would only live with for like a month or so. I was seven when the Shirogane's adopted me and seven when I spent my first Thanksgiving with them. And then I was eight when I spent a second one with them and now I'm nine with my third Thanksgiving with them. I still get worried during holidays, I still think they'll get rid of me like all the other families.”

Lance traces circles on the desktop while listening to Keith silently before letting out a soft sigh. “But they're not, they love you, they love you so much I thought they were your real parents and I mean, _they are_. Because they love you, they're your real parents, even if it's not by blood.” Lance states with so much confidence that Keith is forced to smile and blush a bit. “My family loves you too, we're all your family too now, you know?”

“Thanks. That means a lot.” Keith smiles, slowly picking up his drawing and flipping it over to show Lance. “It's my family and yours all together. This is why I didn't want to come over, with all of your real family over there I thought you'd think I was out of place.”

Lance is gaping at the drawing, eyes wide and words failing him. He reaches out slowly to take the drawing into his hands and look over the whole drawing. There they were, Keith and Lance front and center, Shiro behind Keith and Mila behind Lance. Milo was standing to the right of Lance and Mila, with their parents beside Milo, his mom holding Yaha and his dad holding Beto. And Keith's parents standing to the left of Shiro and Keith. Lance couldn't get over how detailed everybody was, his fingers tracing over each face. “Shut up.... can I have this? I think my mom would wanna frame this in our living room.”

“Ah,” Keith laughs, hands covering his face and falling to rest on the desk top in embarrassment. Words muffled by his palms.

“What?”

Lifting his head just slightly, Keith nods. “Yes. You can have it. I'll ask my parents if they want to go to your house tomorrow for dinner tomorrow.”

“Alright! I'll see you guys tomorrow, bye Keith!” Lance chirps, drawing in hand as he heads back to his house to find his parents right away. “Ma! Ma!” he calls throughout the house over the shouts of his cousins and chatter of his aunts and uncles. He finally finds his mom in her room, putting away some laundry. “Ma, can Keith and his family come over for dinner tomorrow? They're not going anywhere and look, Keith says we're all family.” Lance adds, showing her the drawing, Maria gasping slightly as she takes it into her own hands, admiring it for a few seconds before finally talking.

“My, this is beautiful, he drew this?” She questions, Lance nodding eagerly and bouncing on the heels of his feet. “I wouldn't mind at all, the Shirogane's are great people and Keith and Shiro are almost always over here anyway. Keith is right, they are family.” she nods, setting the drawing down on her dresser. “I'm going to hold onto that, I'm hanging it in the living room when I get a chance.” and Lance snorts realizing just how well he knew his mom and how she would _definitely_ want to hang it up.

Thanksgiving dinner is packed. Tables are set up throughout the living room and added to the dining hall to fit all of Lance's family. There are still kids running around and the adults all sit together to talk but Lance grins as he watches his family. He sees Keith getting bombarded with questions from two of his cousins and Mila practically hanging off of Shiro as several of their cousins giggle over him. And he smiles because he hopes Keith and Shiro are always part of his family long after they all grow up.

 

* * *

 

Christmas is filled with his family again. They don't come to Lance's house every year, but this year all holiday meet ups are held at the McClain house. He's sure that next year all events were being held at his uncle Edgar's house. Beside the point though, _all_ of his family members come this time. All three of his moms brothers and her sister. And all three of his dads sisters and brother and both sets of grandparents. And again, he notices Keith's family doesn't leave and they don't have other family members over.

So on the last day of class Lance asks Keith what's up with that on the bus ride home. “Hey, Keith? How come your family doesn't go out of town for holidays or invite their families over to celebrate?”

“We don't really have any family to visit. Mom has a sister but... well moms dad passed away and her mom is in a senior citizen home out in Australia and her sister lives out there too and she can't travel because of work and mom doesn't like to travel out of the country for holidays anyway. Dad's parents both passed away and he was an only kid, so we don't have any relatives to invite over.” Keith shrugs, going back to looking out the window to avoid the look of disappoint that quickly takes over Lance's features.

“That's kind of sad.” Hunk pipes in, chin resting on the back of his seat as he looks from Keith to Lance. “My mama doesn't visit her family for holidays because they hate that she married a woman. And my mom's family is coming out to visit for the holidays. They get here tomorrow, it's not gonna be as many people as Lance's family but still more .”

“I always forget some people don't have a mom and dad.” Keith sighs, slouching in his seat and eyes drifting to look at Lance.

“I think it's okay! Two of my aunts are gay. Well, one aunt says she still likes boys so I'unno what that is, she likes everybody but she's got a girlfriend.” Lance throws out, grin plastered to his face.

“Do any of your uncles like boys?” Hunk is the one to ask and Keith seems to sink further in his seat at the question.

“Um...” Lance seems to think it over then shake his head. “Yeah! My Tio Jackson is married to a guy and they have two kids, they're adopted, a boy and girl but that's it.” Lance pauses for a moment then keeps going. “Well—I'm not supposed to tell anybody but my Tio Beni likes guys sometimes. But he loves his wife he said, he'd never leave my Tia Ruby.”

“What about you?” Keith questions, both Hunk and Lance looking at him with confusion in their eyes. “I mean, like what about you? Do you like girls or boys or both?”

Lance hums before laughing. “None. I don't want to get married, I want to explore the universe. I want to travel through space and find aliens! That or be a dolphin trainer or explore the ocean and find mermaids!” Keith doesn't seem satisfied with the answer but he takes it and sits back, mumbling something under his breath about _mermaids aren't real_ but Lance either ignores it or doesn't hear him. The rest of the ride home is filled with Lance and Hunk babbling on about a new cartoon they'd both started watching.

Again, Keith's family comes over for dinner and he swears he hears his Mama Sandra refer to Keith's mom as her daughter. And he's pretty sure Tio Beni has adopted Shiro as his _second_ favorite nephew, second because Lance is always going to be Beni's favorite. He notices his Tia Karen talking to Keith for a while, a long while but he doesn't question it, he would have but he ends up distracted and forgetting about it. They all stay up together until midnight and then open presents, Keith confused by the tradition but accepting it with joy as he opens his presents. Several of his family members having gotten Keith, Shiro and their parents presents as well.

By the time one in the morning rolls around most of the kids have crashed and several of his aunts and uncles have left for the night. His grandparents already heading to their rooms for bed and Keith's family bidding their goodbyes. Keith is sitting by the doorway, pulling his shoes on and Lance is standing beside him, robot lion in hand and grin splitting across his face until he hears his Uncle Beni roar with laughter. All eyes fall to him and after a few seconds of nearly choking on his laugh, Beni points to Lance and Keith.

Looking up, Keith is the one to let out a loud whine when he notices the mistletoe hanging above them. “You know the rules boys.” Beni laughs, slapping his nephew on the shoulder, Lance wincing as he looks to his mom for help.

“Beni! Leave them alone, that mistletoe is only there for decoration.” Maria scolds her brother, shuffling Lance towards the bedrooms. “Go on to bed Lance, it's getting late and we're all going to mass in the morning.

“Okay. Goodnight Mr and Mrs. Shirogane. Goodnight Shiro and,” he pauses, eyes resting on Keith who's finally standing, jacket in hand and eyes still wide. “Goodnight Keith.” Lance blurts out, running forward to kiss Keith on the cheek and then all but runs to Mila's room.

 

* * *

  

Things go back to normal after that. Keith's family spends New Years eve with them as well. Some of Lance's relatives having gone home by then so it's not as crowded when they gather around to at midnight.

“Beni, you have the suitcase?” Maria asks her brother who gives her two thumbs up and held up the dark gray suitcase by the front door. “And Ruby you have the bucket of water... Jojo! Do you have the envelope with mony from everybody in it?” again, another pair of thumbs up are sent her way and she nods her head, glancing around. “Everybody has their bowls of grapes? Twelve?”

A chorus of _yes ma'am_ is her answer and she nods, walking around to converse with people while they waited for the countdown to begin.

“Lance?”

“Yeah Keith?”

“What are all these things your mom is making us do?”

“Huh? Oh, they're family traditions. The grapes are one grape for each month of the coming year, for good luck. And the suitcase is for good luck if we want to travel this coming year. The bucket of water is like throwing away bad vibes and the money in the envelope goes in the mailbox for better income or something.” Lance explains, rolling his grapes around in his bowl.

“Oh. Do they work?”

“I don't know but my family thinks they do so I like participating.” he explains, jumping when his mom squeals and turns up the television. The one minute count down begins and he can see his uncle preparing the suitcase to go out and his wife picking up the bucket of water. Lance glances over at Keith and laughs as he watches the other boy nervously grab a handful of his twelve grapes in his hand.

_Ten_

_Nine_

_Eight_

_Seven_

_Six_

_Five_

_Four_

_Three_

_Two_

_One_

_Happy New Years!_

Several things happen at once. Beni tosses the suitcase out with a howl and proceeds to toss his grapes into his mouth like a starving man. Ruby throws the water with a scream and the bucket slips from her fingers as well, landing in the driveway with a loud clatter. Uncle Jojo races across the yard, envelope in hand and slams it into the mailbox, cheers chasing behind him when he hoots at the success. And Lance starts to eat his grapes one by one, nearly choking as he stops to look at Keith who is shoving as many grapes as he can into his mouth. He seems to pause at five to chew before tossing another one in.

“Keith, slow down, you don't have to finish them all super fast.” Lance laughs between grape number four and grape number five. Keith slows down with a cheeky grin and swallows the handful of grapes already in his mouth.

Lance looks around the room and sees all the married adults sharing a kiss once they finish their grapes, he sees his sister Mila talking to Shiro and he's positive they'll kiss but they never do.

“Lance.”

“Hm?”

“Lance! I dropped my last grape!” Keith is in a panic, hopping from foot to foot and Lance has to stop himself from bursting into a fit of laughter. “Lance does that mean I'll have bad luck during one whole month or the whole year??” Keith cries out, rushing to pick the grape up and frown as he notices the dirt on it. There was no way he'd put that in his mouth now.

“Relax, you're fine. It won't kill you or anything, here have one of my grapes.” Lance offers his bowl out to Keith only for him to frown further at the offering.

“No! You need to finish yours! I'll just grab a new one and hope for the best.” Keith frowns, racing off to find Maria and the bags of grapes, Lance laughing after him before finishing his last grape.

 

* * *

  

The next few months go by quickly. Lance's birthday in February and the big party he has with the water slide, the magician and the really great cake that Keith has two slices of. Keith's birthday goes by in April with a small dinner at the McClain household with Hunk over as well.

Lance's parents announce they're having another baby, due in December.

The end of the school years approaches and on the last day of school Keith has his first heartbreak on the bus ride home.

“Mom says we're going to Australia to visit her sister and mom all summer.” Keith tells Lance and Hunk who _oo_ and _aw_ at the mention of going to the other side of the world.

“When are you guys leaving?” Hunk asks, practically jumping in his seat.

“We're leaving on Saturday,”

“But you're coming back right?” Lance asks, standing up as the bus comes to a stop, Hunk and Keith following behind him as they all get off.

“Yeah, of course. We're just visiting her family for a little while. Sorry I'm gonna miss your birthday Hunk.”

“It's okay, you're leaving the day before my birthday, but as long as you bring me back something cool from Australia I don't mind.” Hunk assures him, pausing at the end of his driveway.

“I'll bring you back something pretty cool, I promise. Happy Birthday, I'll see you in July.” and with that they wave goodbye and Hunk makes his way inside, Lance and Keith walking down further to Lance's driveway. “Lance, you know how you said you don't like girls or boys?”

“Yeah, why?”

“I... I wanted to tell you that I liked you.”

“Really? I like you too Keith, you're a pretty cool guy.” Lance grins nervously, palms suddenly sweaty as he glanced to his door.

“No, I mean... I meant like, I like like you Lance.” Keith rephrases, hands fidgeting together as he glances up and down the street. He quickly leans forward and kisses Lance's cheek to further prove his point. “I like you like that.”

“Keith... we're ten and I don't like boys. I'm sorry. I'll see you when you're back in July, okay?” Lance whispers turning on his heels and running inside. He tosses his bag down and quickly climbs onto the couch to look at Keith through the window. He stands in the driveway for a few minutes before turning, crossing the street and heading into his house.

“Lance? Mijo, is that you?”

“Yeah, ma. I'm home.”

“How was school? Anything exciting happen?”

“No... not really. Did you know Keith's family is going to Australia for the whole summer? He just told me and he's not coming back until July.”

“Sounds like the suitcase really worked for them, huh!” Maria chirps, walking into the living room to ruffle her sons hair.

“Yeah it really did.” he nods, wondering if that one grape Keith had dropped caused that _awkward_ situation they just had. And that was the moment Lance decided that the silly New Years traditions really did work.

 


	2. When We Were Seventeen

_When we were seventeen and I accidentally asked you on a date and instead introduced you to Nyma._

 

* * *

 

  
  


True to his word, Keith's family was gone until July twenty-fifth. Upon his return though everything seemed fine. Keith was his normal self again, he didn't seem too jumpy around Lance or like he had a _crush_. So Lance didn't mention it and he never told a soul what Keith had told him that sunny June afternoon before he left.

“How was Australia?” Hunk asks while the three of them laid in the grass in his backyard, staring at the clouds rolling by.

“Hot.”

“Isn't Australia down under?” Lance questions, both Keith and Hunk sitting up to glance at him. “What? You have to go down to get to Australia, right?”

“I guess so, but that's a weird way to phrase it.” Hunk shrugs, laying back down in the grass.

“How was summer here?”

“We went to that water park an hour away.” Lance shares, Keith humming in acknowledgment. “Hunk's mom wanted to have another baby and his mama said no.”

“Mom had to sleep on the couch after the big fight.” Hunk sighs.

“Which one is which again?” Keith questions.

“Um, mama is Eva and mom is Alondra. Mom has lighter skin and she's a little bit taller than mama.” Hunk explains.

“Oh okay.” there's a comfortable silence between the three and Lance likes it. He likes being just friends with his friends. “Did you guys do the summer reading?” a collective groan follows and Lance takes it back. He hates Keith, definitely hates Keith.

 

* * *

 

 

Halloween is spent trick-or-treating with Mila, Milo, Shiro, Hunk, and Kith again while Beto goes out with their parents and baby sister. Candies are traded at the end of the night and again Mila and Shiro have matching Halloween costumes.

Thanksgiving is spent differently than the previous year or any year since Lance can remember. They were meant to travel to his Uncle Edgar's house in North Carolina but with his mom being pregnant and unable to travel, they stay home instead. Hunk's family and Keith's come over for Thanksgiving dinner. They're all chatting, Lance digging into his mashed potatoes when his mom suddenly stands up and everybody looks at her.

“Ma, did you wet your pants?” it's Beto who asks and that's when Lance notices his moms pants have a wet spot.

“Yes. Hector take me to the ER right this second, Cristiano is coming.”

Chaos.

That's how Lance would describe the rest of that night. He stays at the dinner table while his mom, dad, Mila and Keith's mom (Chanci), all get into a car and leave for the emergency room. Hunk's moms take Lance's younger brother and sister to the Garrett's house along with Hunk's younger brother and sister, Chris and Veronica. Tadashi, Keith's dad, stays with Lance, Keith, Hunk, Shiro and Milo at the McClain house. Everybody is everywhere and Lance remains at the table with Keith and Hunk. Once everything settles Keith is the first to talk.

“Why'd your mom pee her pants?”

“She's having the baby.” Hunk supplies, Lance frowning at his now cold mashed potatoes.

“Is that a good thing?”

“No.” both boys turn to look at Lance, “No, because that'll make six of us total and each time they have a new kid I get less attention. Yahira is a real brat, you know, I bet Cristiano is gonna be another little brat.” Lance huffs, Keith frowning at his words and Hunk rolls his eyes.

“Dude, your baby sister is like three, all three year old's are brats. Even my little sister is a brat and she's already five. You're a brat sometimes too you know.” Hunk points out only to have Lance shoot him a pout. “My point is, Cristiano is your new brother, you have to grow up, you'll love him.”

“Shut up Hunk.” and with those words Lance grabs a handful of mashed potatoes and flings it at Hunk's face. “Don't get all emotional and deep on me, we're kids and I have a right to not want a new brother. My parents didn't even ask me for permission to have another.”

“That's because they're your parents, they can do what they want, that's what being an adult is.” Keith snaps, standing on his chair to grab some napkins for Hunk who looks on the verge of tears.

“I don't care.”

By the time four in the morning rolls around everybody is fast asleep. Hunk and Lance sharing a bed while Shiro and Keith slept on a pile of blankets on Lance's bedroom floor. Tadashi sleeping in the living room couch and Milo in his own bed.

By six in the morning the house phone is ringing.

By six thirty in the morning Shiro is helping a sleepy Lance and Keith into the back seat of the car while Tadashi takes Hunk back to his house and Milo complains about how early it is.

And by seven Lance is fully awake and walking into the maternity ward lobby while holding Milo's hand and walking behind Keith, Shiro and their dad. “Good morning, we're here to see Maria McClain?” Lance doesn't listen to the rest of the conversation between Mr. Shirogane and the nurse, instead he looks around the lobby. He sees a few people sitting around, some with balloons and flowers, he sees one guy holding a case of blue cupcakes. “Lance? Hey, this nurse is going to take you and Milo in to see your parents okay? We'll have to wait out here until a little later though.”

Lance nods, Milo leading him forward as they follow the nurse past some automatic doors and down the hall a bit. “Are you excited to be a big brother?” the nurse doesn't look at either of them but Lance knows she's talking to him. The adults always talk to him when they ask dumb questions like that.

“I already am. I have a little brother named Beto and a little sister named Yahira.” Lance states calmly, spotting Keith's mom sitting in a chair at the end of the hall.

“Well, third time big brother is still pretty exciting, don't you think?” the nurse chirps, Lance nodding in response, Milo tightening his grip in a warning to be polite.

“Mrs. Shirogane, good morning.” Milo waves, hugging the woman in greeting. “Keith and Shiro and Mr. Shirogane are out in the other lobby. They said they had to wait.”

Lance quickly hugs Chanci as well and the woman smiles between Milo and him.

“Yes, I know. Your dad and sister are in there with your mother though and the new baby boy. Tell them I'll be back, I'm going out to the lobby for a few minutes, okay?” she ruffles his hair and then she's heading back the way they had just come. When the nurse opens the big door, Lance's heart picks up speed and he shuffles in slowly ahead of Milo. He sees his sister curled up in the armchair and his dad standing by the bed. His mom is holding a bundle of blankets and Lance can't see the baby in them.

“Good morning, boys.” his dad greets upon seeing them. Reaching down, Hector picks Lance up into his arms and leans him in close to see Cristiano. “Isn't he just precious?”

And he is.

Lance can't deny that. The baby in his mothers arms has lighter skin than any of his siblings and he has a tiny button nose. His hair is a light brown, a similar shade to Lance's own hair and boy does Cristiano have plenty of it on his head. He notices the little freckle by his brothers left eye. He didn't know babies were born with freckles. And the moment the baby makes a little whine, sticks his tongue out just barely and moves around in the blankets just a little.... Lance knows he loves his new baby brother.

“Can I hold him?”

 

* * *

 

 

Lance nearly forgets he has a new brother sometimes. Cristiano is so quiet, he rarely ever cries and Lance is positive that isn't normal, with how often and how loud Yahira had cried when she first came home from the hospital. But his parents tell him it's perfectly normal.

Christmas and New Years are spent in North Carolina at Tio Edgar's house with Keith and Shiro tagging along while their parents stay home for work. The first day at his uncles house is one Lance will never forget. Keith wet his pants that day. Maria and Hector might have forgotten to warn Keith and Shiro that Tio Edgar had several dogs on his property. He owned a large plot of land where he had several horses for training purposes and to keep trespassers out Edgar also owned ten dogs that ran free throughout the fenced in training grounds. His house was within the fenced area too, so when Keith climbed out of the car first he hadn't been expecting five large dogs to come running at him. Needless to say, Keith let out the longest scream of his life and soon stood in a pair of wet jeans while Lance cackled behind him.

After a long shower and several comforting hugs from Maria, Keith came back downstairs and nobody mentioned the incident anymore.

“Hey Keith, wanna go meet the dogs? I promise they won't hurt you.” after several minute of persuasion, Keith headed out with Lance, hand in hand and Keith ready to bolt back inside.

“Do they sleep outside?”

“What? No, what kind of animal do you take my Tio Edgar for?” Lance scuffs, pointing to a large shed in the distance. “That's the dog's house. It's pretty nice actually, it's got like two floors, this ramp that goes up and upstairs is a bunch of dog beds, blankets and toys. Downstairs has this automatic feeding dispenser, it feeds them at six am, at one pm and at eight pm. In case Tio Edgar and Tia Linda aren't home because their kids forget often. And behind the shed is a huge fenced off like, potty ground where the dogs do their business and they all take turns cleaning it every night.” Lance explains, walking further around the yard before whistling lightly, a few of the dogs running at them, Keith squeaking but Lance's grip keeping him from making a run for it.

“Why does he have so many?” Keith asks cautiously as the dogs bark excitedly at their feet.

“Tio Edgar says it's to keep trespassers out but Tia Linda told me it's because she loves dogs and every time she asked for one Tio Edgar couldn't say no to her.” Lance chuckles, petting one of the dogs. “There's ten of them total and, no kidding, sometimes I forget who is who. But the names are Lucy, Roxy, Pipen, Sugar, Jack, Snowflake, Fuzzy Butt, Woofens, Tiger and my personal favorite, Blue.”

“Why is Blue your favorite?” Keith questions while cautiously reaching out to pet a nearby dog with white fur and light brown patches.

“I named her, she has the prettiest blue eyes ever. Look. Blue! Come here girl!” and moments later a dog with mixed colored fur is running at them, tongue dangling from her mouth. Keith can't tell if the different fur colors are a result of mud and dirt or if they're natural. She slows to a stop when she's near them and even from a distance Keith can see the bright blue eyes. They're practically glowing against the black fur surrounding her eyes. “She's an Australian shepherd and she got good genes I guess because her brother Pipen doesn't have blue eyes like hers.”

“She's beautiful.” Keith breathes, kneeling down beside Lance to pet Blue.

The rest of the two week vacation is spent with Keith learning the names of each and every dog, learning the names of most of Lance's cousins and eating more food than he's used to. It seems like there's always food out for them to eat and Keith wonders just how they afford this much food. It's always enough to feed an army.

 

* * *

 

 

Birthdays come and go, Keith and Lance both turn eleven, Hunk turns twelve and the school year comes to an end. They both worry about going to middle school but Hunk assures them it's not that bad. Lance's sister Mila gets ready to go to college and Shiro does too. Lance is positive that Mila is still in love with Shiro but she doesn't show it as much anymore. Or at least he thinks so until she brings home a guy named Cameron for Thanksgiving in sixth grade and it's like she suddenly doesn't even know who Shiro is.

Middle school starts for them and Keith and Lance have several classes together, they even see Hunk more often than just after school now. In seventh grade Keith goes to Mexico with Lance's family for the holidays. And the summer after seventh grade Mila has her wedding with Cameron. Lance and Keith are twelve at the time and the wedding is something of a bore for them to remember.

Lance is the ring boy, Yahira is the flower girl and a few of his cousins are Mila's bride's maids. The wedding is filled with dancing, cheers, and Lance remembers the bouncy house and the bubble machine the most. The money dance was one of the weirdest aspects of the wedding. Guests took turns dancing with Mila and Cameron, each person who went up for a dance pinning money onto them. Mila and Cameron are covered in bills by the time the seven minute song is over and Lance is positive they raked in at least five hundred dollars each. Most of the bills on Mila's dress being twenties. He also remembers how when his sister was ready to toss her flowers all the single ladies ran around the tables, hand in hand and cheering, running around the bride and finally forming a large crowd behind Mila as she throws her bouquet. The first two times are caught by kids so Mila throws her flowers a third time. Lance's dad shouting out _'Third times the charm!'_ just as Vanessa catches them, Milo's girlfriend and everybody is sure the two will get married soon after that.

They're in eighth grade when Mila has twins, when the stove in Lance's kitchen catches on fire and he hears his mom and dad scream at each other for the first time. They're also in eighth grade when they meet a sixth grader who skipped a grade and also when said sixth grader makes Lance cry.

“I still don't get it, this sixth grader... made you cry?” Keith repeats, Hunk grinning beside him and Lance still sniffling.

“Yeah, so go beat him up.”

“No.”

“I thought you were my friend!” Lance cries out, arms flying above his head and Keith shrugging.

“Yeah but I'm not here to beat people up for you.” Keith points out, stopping at his locker to switch out a few binders for textbooks. “Besides, the kids gotta be like what, twelve? Eleven?”

“Ten, actually.” all three boys pause and turn around to see a head of messy hair, large round glasses and a confident smirk on the kids face. “I heard you guys talking about how I made Lance cry.”

“Stuff a sock in it!” Lance cries out from behind Hunk, squeaking and ducking further behind his larger friend when the kid shoots him a _look_.

“What'd you even do to him?” Keith asks, locker door slamming shut and arms crossing over his chest.

“I told him he was an idiot for calling me a boy.” the kid shrugs, shooting Lance another frown. “He didn't like that too much so I used this zapping pen on him and he started to cry, it doesn't even hurt, see.” and then they're reaching out quickly to press the pen to Keith's arm and give him a little shock. Keith yelps before slapping the pen from the shorter kids hands.

“What the heck, don't just shock people.”

“Uh, I gotta agree, that's not a nice thing to do.” Hunk nods, patting Lance's hand on his shoulder.

“Yeah, well I'm sorry. I'm Pidge by the way, a _girl_.” she snaps, swiping the pen off the ground and into her pocket.

“I'm Hunk, that's Keith and you know Lance.”

After that it just became normal for Pidge to meet up with them after school and sit with Hunk on the bus ride home. She always rides the bus longer than them and eventually she starts coming over after school. For homework, video games and dinner. It turns out she lives just about two streets down and after that Pidge became a member of the “squad” as Lance refers to them despite everybody's complains about it.

 

* * *

 

 

They're fourteen when they start high school, Hunk is fifteen and a grade above them. They have some electives together and they're only missing Pidge. They no longer ride the bus home together, the middle school and high school having separate buses but that doesn't stop Pidge from coming over almost daily.

Keith still joins Lance's family during the holidays and eventually some of Lance's relatives dub Keith an official McClain. Some argue he's a Hernandez, Garcia, Miller, Brown, or a Rodriguez but at the end of the day, they always call him a McClain.

High school goes by in almost a breeze, Lance and his friends getting into trouble every so often. Like the time Pidge tried to hack the school system and change the lunch menu or the time Lance paid her to change his grade, both ended in detention. Lance joins the track team in high school, Keith and Pidge start a space club and Hunk joins the robotics team.

Hunk is the first to get his drivers license but Lance is the first to get a car. His sister Mila has another baby when Lance is in tenth grade and she takes a break from college for a year. She eventually goes back and becomes a nurse and Lance has never felt more proud of his sister. In tenth grade Milo and Vanessa break up and Lance has never seen his brother look more devastated in his life. They're in tenth grade when Keith and his parents leave town for a month, he misses school but somehow doesn't fall behind. When they come back Keith acts like nothing happened, ignores any and all questions about his trip, so Lance forgets.

During the summer after tenth grade Hunk meets a girl named Shay at a STEM camp he goes to for college credit. It turns out Shay goes to their high school and Lance constantly teases Hunk on his crush after that. They end up dating when Lance is in eleventh grade and Hunk and Shay are seniors. Lance celebrates the relationship more than Hunk and Shay do.

In eleventh grade Lance decides he wants to work in marine biology. He wants to study sea life and explore the ocean. Keith tells him that's a great idea. Lance is sixteen when he tells Hunk, Keith and Pidge that he actually does like people romantically, he really does. He's also sixteen when he meets a pretty blonde girl at the mall who actually likes him back.

He's seventeen when he asks this girl to be his girlfriend. He's seventeen when he spends most of his summer away from his friends with this girl.

“Look, I'm just asking what's up with you. We've all hardly seen you since school got out,” Keith explains, sitting on the edge of Lance's bed. “Hunk actually thought you had a group of secret friends you were picking over us. As ridiculous as that idea is, Hunk fully convinced himself of it.”

“You're right, that is a ridiculous idea. I can have a life outside of just hanging out with you guys you know.” Lance sighs, spinning his chair in circles by his desk. “Look, if you really want to know what's up with me then why don't you come over tonight? Seven?” Lance waits for a reply and he can't help but notice the sour look that forms on Keith's face.

“Are you... did you just—are you asking me—”

“God, yes Keith!” Lance groans, sliding down in his chair and sighing heavily. “Yes, I'm asking you to come over for dinner, so is that a yes?” he's never seen Keith nod so eagerly and leave so fast.

By dinner time, his family is home and the girl he's spent his summer with so far comes over in a pretty sky blue dress. Her name is Nyma and not even ten minutes after she gets there does Keith show up. Lance is confused, Keith is dressed up, black slacks, button up red shirt and... his hair is even brushed back neatly.

“Keith? You're really dressed up.”

“Yeah and you're dressed really casually.” Keith notes, Lance noticing the frown that quickly forms on Keith's face.

“Yeah, come in, I was just introducing Nyma to everybody.” Lance steps aside and gives Keith room to come inside.

“Nyma?”

“My girlfriend.”

“Your... your? _Oh_.”

Lance leads Keith into the dining hall where his family is sitting and Nyma is conversing with Maria, Nyma seeming to enjoy the conversation more than Maria. “Hey Nyma, this is my best friend Keith, one of the people I talk about often.” Lance introduces, Nyma stands up swiftly and walks up to them, perfect smile on her face and hand held out to Keith.

“Nice to meet you, Lance has said so many great things about you.” she chirps, Keith shaking her hand nervously and Lance grins between his girlfriend and best friend.

“My, my Keith, you're dressed up nicely. Are you going out?” it's Maria who breaks the awkward silence and Keith seems far more jumpy than usual to Lance when he quickly blurts out a response.

“Yes! Actually, I was. Hunk and I are—we're going out to eat with Shay and Pidge. Somewhere fancy, really nice, so we dressed up. But Lance invited me over and I just stopped by to say hello and see why he was spending less time with us. Clearly a good reason.” Keith laughs, scratching his cheek and taking a few steps back.

“That's a shame, I would've loved for you to join us for dinner. Tell Hunk and Pidge I said hello, please. Have fun tonight though.” Maria smiles, Keith nods and promptly leaves the McClain house. Lance never does learn that Keith actually went straight home, no plans with the others and Lance doesn't learn until years later that that was the second time he broke Keith Shirogane's heart.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked it! I might post a sneak peek at the next chapter on my blog btw!


	3. When We Were Nineteen

_When we were nineteen and I cried on your shoulder because Nyma had left me and I said I was glad I found you, but only as my friend._

 

* * *

 

  
  


Lance is happy with Nyma, really, he is. Sometimes he thinks his family and friends don't like her but he doesn't particularly care, as long as he's happy with her.

Senior year Halloween is the first year Lance doesn't spend with his friends. He cancels his plans with Keith, Hunk and Pidge the day before when Nyma tells him they're going to a party her friend is hosting.

“It'll be fun.”

“I mean, I guess, but I feel so weird, I've spent every Halloween with those guys since I was like... born.”

“So you can spend just one away from them. It's healthy to break traditions every now and then you know.” Nyma chides, pulling on her angel wings and powdering on more body glitter. Lance has to admit Nyma looks fantastic, maybe her dress is a little short to be considered _angel approved_ and her heels make her taller than him, but she still looks beautiful with her hair curled to frame her face and her skin literally glittering when she moves. “Alright, ready to go?”

“Yeah, yeah, ready. Come on.” he nods, grabbing his red horns off the bed and pulling them on. Nyma had picked out the outfits. He was wearing loose fitting black jeans with a black belt, black sneakers, a devils tail, horns and a bit of red eye shadow. His costume was a shirtless one and despite having a toned body, Lance felt a bit expose, but after much convincing and pouting from Nyma had agreed to go shirtless.

The drive to the party is a rather long one, it's filled with music Lance wants to cringe at, some gossip from Nyma and a bit of arguing about whether or not they were heading in the right direction. By the time they actually get to the house party the place is crowded, colored lights are flashing through each window, music blaring and cars crowding the streets nearby.

“Hey I'm gonna head inside, find a parking spot then come look for me okay?” she doesn't wait for an answer before climbing out and heading in. Lance finds a spot to park and instead of heading in he checks his phone. He sees pictures of Pidge, Hunk and Keith on their social media, they're watching horror movies, snacks piled around Hunk's living room. There's a new update and the first thing Lance notices is that Keith's location, according to his status, is the same town he's in at the moment. Which _isn't_ where Hunk's house is.

“What the hell?” he whispers, dialing Keith quickly. After three rings, there's a muffled _hello?_ “Keith, where are you guys?”

“Hunk's house.”

“You're a damn liar.”

“What?”

“You guys are following me, aren't you?” Lance accuses, shutting his car off and climbing out. He's looking around the parking lot, frown edged onto his expressions. “Where are you guys?”

“Lance, you're crazy.” Keith snaps back. Lance can hear Pidge mumble something in the background and Keith telling her to shut it.

“Why are you guys following me, I know you—” a nearby car alarm goes off and he can hear Hunk let out a cry and the same car alarm going off through Keith's phone before everything is muted on Keith's end. “I just heard the car alarm, you guys are idiots. Go home, I'm mad.” and with that Lance ends the call and heads inside. He's got a drink in hand and chocolate in the other, looking for Nyma when he spots Keith in the crowd. His anger boils over and he rushes up to him.

“I told you guys to go home!” Lance snaps.

“Yeah, well what kind of friends would we be then? Huh?” Keith snaps back, knocking the cup from Lance's hand. “You're being an idiot, this isn't you. Nyma is a shit influence on you.”

“Don't talk about her that way!”

“You know Hunk just caught her upstairs kissing some dude, what now Lance?” Keith growls and Lance's expression is unreadable for a second. Then it's a blur. One second Keith is in Lance's face and the next he's on the ground, trying to catch his breath and realizing Lance had punched him in the face.

“Fuck you _and_ Hunk.” Lance screams, eyes turning to them, whispers of a fight filling the air. Keith wipes the blood from his nose on his sleeve and gets back on his feet, shoving Lance back between his words.

“Don't talk about Hunk that way. You're being a god awful friend, you're being a little shit all because a pretty face took an interest in you.” Keith accuses, his last shove knocking Lance into the wall.

“You guys need to let me live my own life,” Lance flings his hand forward but Keith catches it, twisting his arm down and behind Lance's back. “Fuck! Let go, you're gonna break my arm!”

“Fine.” with a shove, Keith knocks Lance to the ground and steps back. “I'm finding Hunk and Pidge and we're out of here. Don't come crawling back to us when you realize Nyma isn't who you think she is.”

“Fuck you guys.” Lance breathes out, sitting on his floor as he watches Keith walk away.

 

* * *

 

 

That's the last time Lance talks to Keith, Hunk or Pidge until Christmas. It's easier when it comes to Hunk since he's away at college most days, but he sees Keith and Pidge almost every day in the schools halls. Keith is the best at pretending like he doesn't know Lance, he doesn't even glance back when they walk past each other. Pidge is another story. Her face will light up and then quickly fall when she remembers Lance isn't talking to them. He'll often catch her in the library when he goes after school. Sometimes he can tell she's watching him walk to his car while waiting for her parents to pick her up.

Lance hates it. Thanksgiving is easy for him to forget because they go away for the week, his mom asks about Keith but Lance gives an excuse that Keith is busy. That he's spending it with Hunk for a change. Christmas is harder though. They go away for the holiday again but upon returning Lance's parents tell him to take Keith his presents. His relatives had gotten used to the idea of having Keith around that they naturally bought him gifts. He had a pile of about fifteen gifts to take over.

“Lance?”

“Yeah. I have gifts for you.”

“I don't want them.” the door is nearly shut in Lance's face but his foot stops it, Keith letting out a groan. “I don't want anything from you, okay? Just—just take them back.”

“They're not from me. They're from my relatives. Tia Karen missed you the most, I'm pretty sure she got you one of those digital watch things.” Lance mumbles, rattling the large plastic bag at his side. “I think Tio Beni got you a new jacket and some gloves.”

“How do you know?”

“I might've snooped through the presents that were in bags.” Lance shrugs with a small smile.

“Great.” Keith sighs, reaching for the bag and setting it down just inside the doorway. “I'll send them thank you messages over Facebook, was that all you wanted?”

“Yes—no--I mean, Halloween. It was stupid. I was drunk and I regret it and I'm sorry, really, I am.” Lance whispers, his eyes looking everywhere but Keith's face. “I regret it so bad and I miss you guys.”

“Pity.”

That forces Lance to look at Keith and when nothing else follows the one word, Lance's face twists into one of confusion. “That's all you have to say?”

“What more were you expecting?”

“Apology accepted kind of thing? I don't know.” Lance shrugs and then he's confused when Keith laughs.

“I'm not about to accept your apology that fast. You have to get passed Pidge and Hunk before I'll be your friend again. How are you and Nyma, by the way?”

“Going strong still.”

“So were Milo and Vanessa when they ended it.”

“That's a low blow. Don't drag my brother into this.” Lance sneers, Keith throws his hands up in defense. “I'll talk to Hunk and Pidge then.”

And he does. He talks to Hunk first. That very same afternoon actually, after filling a small container with cookies and a large travel cup with hot chocolate he heads over to the Garrett's house.

“Lance? It's been a while since you've been over.”

“I know, I'm sorry about that. Is Hunk home?” it's Hunk's mom, Alondra who answers the door.

“Yes, he's upstairs in his room, you can head on up if you want.” she nods, letting him in and shutting the door behind him.

“Thank you.” he smiles, before setting on his way up the stairs, down the hall and stopping just outside of Hunk's shut door. Knocking, he waits for the _come in_ and opens the door. “Hunk?”

“ _Lance?_ ”

“Yeah, it's me. I'm here to... apologize. With cookies and hot chocolate. Peace offerings.” Lance smiles, the Tupperware and mug being held up for Hunk's viewing. He seems to contemplate it for a long time before slowly waving Lance into his room and reaching out for the cookies. Handing them over, Lance climbs onto the bed and swipes a cookie for himself. “I was pretty stupid Halloween night.”

“Yeah, no kidding.” Hunk laughs with a mouthful of cookie. “But I'm not holding it against you.”

“You're not?”

“No way, it's gonna take more than a silly fight with Keith to cut me out of your life.” Hunk assures him, grabbing the mug from Lance's hand and taking a sip. “Your mom made this right? It tastes perfect.”

“Yeah, mom made it.” Lance nods, eyebrow raised. “So then why weren't you talking to me?”

“You needed to learn your lesson.” Hunk shrugs, a second cookie already in hand. “Plus you're the one who wasn't talking to any of us either.” he adds as an after thought.

“You know I love you?”

“Definitely. Love you too Lance.”

Pidge was another easy fix. She tried to play it off, like she had hardly even noticed Lance wasn't talking to them but after some teasing and Lance recreating the way her face looked when she saw Lance at her door, they laugh it out and hug.

“So did you apologize to Keith yet? I think he's the one you should most be worried about, I mean, you punched him in the face.”

“He was the first person I went to. He said he wouldn't take my apology until you and Hunk did.” Lance sighs, laying back on her bed and looking between the NASA posters by her bed.

“Guessing Hunk already accepted it?”

“Yeah.”

“He was never mad at you, you know.”

“So he told me.” Lance nods.

“I wasn't either. Boys are stupid, so it's no surprise a pretty girl like Nyma could wrap you around her finger.” Pidge states bluntly, jumping off her bed and moving to shuffle some things on her desk.

“What is it with you guys and hating Nyma?”

“Lance you don't see it because you have feelings for her or whatever, but Nyma isn't right for you at all. What Keith told you, about Hunk catching her with some other guy, that wasn't a lie. I'm not saying you have to believe us now but imagine what she does when you _aren't_ around.” and Lance feels his stomach drop. He wouldn't confront Nyma on it, but something in the back of his mind told him he should. He ignored that little thought.

“I'll accept your apology if I get to punch you in the face.” Keith stated, folding a few shirts from his laundry basket.

“No way.”

“Then what about punching you in the stomach?”

“No!”

“Kicking you in the shin?”

“Why are you trying to hurt me?” Lance shouts in exasperation, knocking over the pile of folded shirts. Keith stares at the now unfolded shirts for a second before turning to Lance and pointing at the pile.

“That. That is why I want to hurt you. Fold the rest of my laundry and I'll accept your apology.”

He does it, but he isn't happy about it. At least, he says he's not happy about it. They talk and catch up while Lance folds Keith's shirts and even after he finishes, they talk.

The rest of senior year goes by in a blink. Keith and Lance both turn eighteen and they get accepted to the same college as Hunk. Pidge complains about being stuck in High School for another two years and everything seems fine again. His friends are never around when Nyma is and Nyma is never around when his friends are. It's a compromise.

 

* * *

 

 

The following Halloween is their first Halloween in college and they spend it at Lance's house with Pidge, watching horror movies and stuffing their faces with enough candy to last a year. Lance isn't sure where Nyma goes that night but he lets the worry be shoved to the back of his mind.

Out of sight, out of mind.

Thanksgiving is held at the McClain house once again. The house is just as crowded as ever, if not more with Mila and Cameron bringing their kids over now too. Keith finds himself spending everyday at the McClain house, even when Nyma is there.

Again, Lance sees his Tia Karen talking with Keith, both looking distressed and Karen hugging him comfortingly. Lance remembers the first time that happened, when they were nine. He had never asked what they talked about and something told him Keith and Tia Karen wouldn't tell him even if he asked.

Nyma doesn't seem to click with most of his family. Some of his cousins seem to steer clear from her and she doesn't stay for dinner.

“Nyma left?”

“Yeah, said she had to have dinner with her family.” Lance nods, Keith humming in acknowledgment. “What do you and Tia Karen talk about?”

“wouldn't you like to know.” Keith smirks, Lance rolls his eyes at that.

“Duh, that's why I'm asking.”

“Private stuff. I'll tell you in a few years when it isn't relevant anymore.”

“That's not fair, I might forget about it by then!” Lance huffs, pouting like a toddler.

“That's the point, McClain.” Keith snickers, heading off into the kitchen to help Maria bring out the food, Lance trailing behind him.

 

* * *

 

 

Christmas is almost like when they were nine. Keith's family is over and Keith spends more time at Lance's house than usual. He notices Keith is the only one Cristiano (Or, Chicharo as the family has started calling him) really talks to the whole time. If he's not with Keith then he's sitting in the stairway reading a book.

“How do you get him to talk so much?” Lance asks when Cristiano heads to his reading spot and Keith ends up beside him.

“Who?”

“My brother.”

“Oh, I just listen to him. I always ask about the book he's currently reading and then sometimes he'll ask me about space since he knows I have an astronomy class.” Keith shrugs, eyes drifting to the stairs where the topic of their conversation was reading.

“Sometimes I'm amazed at how easily you fit into my family.” Lance whispers, arms finding their way into his back pockets.

“I was practically raised by your family. My parents love you just as much as they love me and Shiro.” Keith assures him.

“How is Shiro by the way? I feel like I haven't seen him in years.”

“Because you haven't, I haven't either.” Keith shrugs. “He's busy working on some new technology for veterans. He's creating fully functional prosthetics for people who've lost arms or legs and stuff.”

“What? Since when? I thought he was going into the film industry?”

“He was, until he had his accident and lost his arm.”

“What the hell Keith?! Why haven't you been updating me on your brother, next you're gonna tell me he's married!” Lance sputters, Keith giving him a cheeky grin at that last comment. “No, no way, no, _he's married?”_

“Yeah. He met a girl named Allura like four years ago, after his accident. She was an assistant in the surgery, she's a medical student and what not. They started dating and Allura introduced him to this program called the Altean Foundation and Shiro started working on prosthetics. They got married like a year ago?”

“Why wasn't I invited to this wedding?”

“They didn't have a big wedding. They just went down to the courthouse to fill out the paperwork and went on a honeymoon. They had a small dinner with their friends though, did you know Pidge has an older brother named Matt?”

“Yeah, why? I've seen him a few times.” Lance nods.

“Because Matt is friends with Allura and Shiro, small world right?” Keith laughs, Lance's eyebrows going up in surprise. “Anyway, they said they were too busy for a real wedding but once their work slows down they'll probably have an actual big wedding party and all.”

“Wow, Shiro's life sounds like something straight out of a movie.”

“Yup.”

“Wait, four years ago? Is that why you and your parents left for like a month?” Lance asks, remembering how Keith had shot down any and all questions about his extended vacation when it happened.

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

“ _Yeah.”_

The rest of Christmas eve is spent running around the house with the younger kids, stopping some of the younger ones from opening presents and eating as much food as they could. It feels like old times and just for the night, Lance forgets he's even dating Nyma.

New Years, Nyma actually stays for the whole night. She's there for dinner, for the traditions, she's there when everybody else bids their goodbyes. She sleeps on the couch, Keith crashing on Lance's floor and she's there in the morning when Lance's family treats Keith like their own son and hardly acknowledge Nyma.

“Lance, I'm gonna go ahead and go. I don't think my presence here is very appreciated.” Nyma announces as Maria is setting dishes out around the table for breakfast. All but Cristiano are in the living room when Nyma makes the awkward declaration, Lance freezing up and glancing to his mother.

“What do you mean?”

“Well if I didn't know any better I'd say your family treats Keith more like your boyfriend than they treat your girlfriend of almost two years.” she says casually, grabbing her shoes off the floor to pull on. That's when Maria sets the pile of dishes down and both Keith and Lance jump to their feet.

“Excuse me?” _oh Maria sounded angry_. And that was something Lance had only ever heard once in his life, when the stove was on fire.

“Did I stutter ma'am? I don't feel welcome here.” Nyma repeats with a sigh.

“You probably don't feel welcome here because you're mooching off my son. You've been nothing but a bad influence on him and you nearly destroyed his friendship with Keith, Hu—”

“Oh, please. Keith did that well on his own, telling Lance I cheated on him and then having a fist fight with him.” the condescending tone in Nyma's voice sets Keith off.

“First of all, don't talk to Maria that way!” Keith snaps, walking in Nyma's direction. “Second off, how do you know we told Lance, huh? He told me he wasn't going to mention it to you, so you just gave yourself away. And third off, I think I speak for my whole family when I say you need to leave.” Keith growls, Lance freezing at the words _my while family_ when they leave Keith's mouth.

“I was just leaving,” she huffs, grabbing her jacket off the coat rack and slamming the door behind her.

“Keith, honey you didn't have to stand up for me that way.” Maria whispers, Hector holding his wife with a small smile on his face.

“I had to, I didn't like how she talked to you.” Keith whispers, Lance slowly heading up the stairs to hide, only to run into his younger brother Cristiano.

“Chicharo? Did you hear everything?” a small nod is all the response Lance gets. “Are you okay?”

“Why are you with that mean lady?”

“Huh?”

“She's awful and somebody else out there might love you the way you deserve, Lance.” the tone in his brothers voice is what breaks Lance's heart the most.

“I'm sorry.”

 

* * *

 

 

Lance's birthday goes by in February and Keith's in April. Nyma doesn't go by the house anymore and Lance notices they drift apart. They drift so far apart until she dumps him in May with harsh words. Words Lance never wants to hear in his life again.

“Keith? Can you meet me somewhere?”

“It's pouring outside, is it even safe to drive?”

“Please.”

“... Where? Are you okay?”

“Baskin Robins? The one by the school. I'm... not. Not okay, not even slightly.” Lance whispers into the phone, positive the crack in his voice gives away the fact that he'd been crying.

“I'm on my way.”

Lance is sitting in his car in the parking lot when Keith pulls up. Lance feels guilty right away, forgetting that Keith drives a motorcycle and he's now soaked to the bone. “I'm sorry, I didn't think about that.” Lance shouts, climbing out of his car and letting the rain soak him.

“Lance! Get inside,” Keith shouts, getting off his bike and rushing Lance into the ice cream shops doors. Shaking his hair head, Lance gives Keith a weak smile. “Come on, ice cream is on me and then we're talking.”

Two orders of rocky road ice cream later and they're sitting at a booth side by side, Lance licking at his ice cream silently and Keith watching him out of the corner of his eye. Half way through their ice cream, Lance slumps further in his seat and his shoulders shake as he chokes on a cry.

“Lance? Lance, hey, what's wrong?”

He shakes his head, bottom lip tugging down as he lets out the ugliest cry Keith has ever heard, his eyes are shut tight as if that'll stop the tears and the sight breaks Keith's heart. They're getting stares and Lance doesn't particularly care as he continues to cry.

A worker brings them over two cups, giving Keith a sympathetic shrug and mouthing _for the cones_. Setting his ice cream in one cup, Keith goes to take Lance's and put it in the other but he jumps back when Lance screams.

“No! Do-on't touch my rocky-y road!”

“Alright, alright I'm not, but Lance, come on, talk to me.”

Keith wants to laugh at the way Lance bites into his ice cream cone while he continues to cry, snot threatening to run into his mouth and strands of saliva connecting his lips before he shuts his mouth. He holds a finger up in the _give me a minute_ kind of way and he munches on his ice cream, his cries settling into hiccups and finally he looks at Keith with puffy red eyes.

“She dumped me.”

_Oh._

“Nyma?”

“Yeah.”

“I'm sorry.” Keith gingerly pats Lance's shoulder, not too sure on what else to do. “Um... I—there's other fish in the ocean?” their eyes meet and for a second Keith is sure Lance is about to shove him out of the booth but instead he starts to giggle.

“Keith, you suck at comforting.” his giggling is mixed with hiccups and the occasional sniffle, but Keith still smiles when he realizes Lance isn't crying anymore.

“Sorry, do you want me to cradle you in my arms or something?” Keith offers, arms stretching open in offering for lance who snorts but accepts the hug anyway.

“Hey Keith?”

“Yeah?”

“You know I'm glad I found you.” Lance whispers, reaching out to drop his ice cream cone into the empty cup.

“What do you mean?”

“I'm glad I found you as my friend, you've always been there for me. I hope you'll always be there for me, you know?”

“O-oh. Yeah.” Keith nods, patting Lance on the back and hiding his pout at the word _friend_.

“You and Hunk and Pidge. I never want to lose you guys again, I don't think I could handle that.” Lance admits, pulling away from the hug and sitting back against the cushion of the booth. “I love you guys.”

“I... yeah, love you too Lance.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter was mildly shorter than the others but there wasn't much to go with, RIP.
> 
> Also!!! Big warning, but chapter 4 (next chapter) is going to have NSFW in it. Like kind of a lot, here's next weeks "When we were" thing just as a warning: "When we were twenty-one and I gave you a blow job at your brothers wedding, went to a sex shop then I took your virginity in a hotel room and left in the middle of the night, saying I didn't remember a thing in the morning."
> 
> Yeah, it's not super descriptive smut but, it'll still be heavily classified as NSFW. Just a warning!!


	4. When We Were Twenty-one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: NSFW like this whole chapter is basically NSFW and I apologize. NSFW parts are in bold! If you want to skip over those.

_When we were twenty-one and I gave you a blow job at your brothers wedding, went to a sex shop then I took your virginity in a hotel room and left in the middle of the night, saying I didn't remember a thing in the morning._

 

* * *

 

 

At the start of their second year in college Lance is living with Hunk and Keith is living on campus. Nyma is occasionally remembered and it requires a trip to the nearest Baskin Robins to get Lance out of his mood. Everything is back to the way it was prior to Nyma. Keith, Hunk and Pidge spending time at Lance's house again.

They take trips to the beach more often now, they go laser tagging one time and Lance wins, miraculously having better aim than any of the others. They don't spend that Halloween at home, instead they go to Halloween Horror Nights, each dressed as a character from a horror movie. Lance is Freddy and Keith as Jason (per Milo's suggestion). Hunk is dressed as Ghostface and Pidge is (after hours of Lance begging) Chucky.

They go through the haunted house and watch the events of the horror night unfold, Pidge screaming several times despite denying it. Keith grabs onto Lance at one point in the night And Hunk seems to be perpetually hiding behind his hands the whole night.

They all agree to never go back when they leave.

Keith joins Lance's family for the holidays again, going to Tia Laura's house for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years.

Twenty is the longest year for them. They're in their third year of school and they're nearly adults but still kids. At the holiday get togethers all the relatives ask both Keith and Lance when they're getting married, if they're dating anybody, what they plan to do in life.

It feels like home and Keith loves every second he gets to spend with Lance's family.

 

* * *

 

When they're twenty-one, Shiro sends them an invite for an official wedding. He's been living in Florida with Allura, unable to travel because of work but they finally made a break through. And they end up with more time to themselves. The wedding takes place in July, Lance's immediate family traveling out there while the rest of his relatives send wedding gifts and congratulation letters.

“I can't believe he lives in Orlando, how lame.” Lance laughs as they wait for their suitcases by the airlines conveyor belt.

“Living it up, right?” Keith nods.

“Right, anyway though, Pidge is coming right? Since her brother knows Shiro?”

“Yeah, Hunk said he and his family are getting here tomorrow.” Keith nods, shuffling forward when he sees his suitcase coming. “My parents are getting here the day of the wedding and leaving the day after. It was all they could get off from work.”

“That blows. My dad owns that one hotel so he can take off a few weeks every year basically. Mom has her side jobs but we'd be fine if she didn't work so she doesn't care if she has to just like up and leave.” Lance explains as he pulls his own suitcase off the belt and stacks it onto the cart they've snagged. He spots Beto and Yahira's bags and he and Keith each grab one.

“I'm glad you guys all came.” Keith says, walking forward and grabbing Maria's bag.

“Wouldn't miss it for the world, Shiro is like a brother. I think Mila is coming, should be funny since she had that big fat crush on Shiro when you guys first moved in.” Lance chuckles, not noticing when Keith pauses at the word crush. They grab Hector and Chicharo's bags and start pushing the cart towards the exit where two cars are waiting for them.

The hotel is nice, Lance's parents booked it at a reduced rate because of Hector's association with the company. Maria and Hector share a room with Chicharo and Yahira. Lance, Keith and Beto all share the second room.

“Milo is going to join you guys in this room when he gets here tomorrow.” Maria tells them, looking through the cabinets in the hotel room.

“Do you know if Mila is coming?” Lance asks, setting his suitcase in the corner of the room.

“Should be, yes. We booked her a room so she better be.” Maria nods, her phone going off as she finishes her words. “Speaking of, there she is.” she leaves the room before answering and Beto comes out of the bathroom in swim trunks.

“I'm going swimming, see ya' later losers.” he announces, grabbing a towel, his flip flops, phone and then leaving.

“Did he take a room key?” Keith asks after a moment of silence and Lance snorts.

“Nope, we're locking him out.”

Mila, Cameron and their three kids arrive late that day and Milo arrives just before dinner. They all go out, meeting Shiro and Allura at the restaurant.

“She's gorgeous, what the fuck.” Lance whispers to Keith while Shiro is introducing his wife. She's just slightly shorter than Shiro and taller than Lance. Her skin is a few shades darker than Lance's and her hair is snow white. Her eyes are what catch Lance's attention however, they seem to reflect light, sparkle and shimmer different colors and Lance is sure they can't be real.

Throughout dinner Shiro explains his prosthetic arm. It's robot but he can wiggle his fingers, lift with it and just use it like a regular arm. What he can't do though is feel with it but it's a short thing to give up if he has use of both arms again.

“Does it bother you that it's robotic?” Beto asks, Maria slapping his wrist and whispering something harshly about being rude.

“No, not at all. It reminds me that I'm a survivor, that I lived through the hardest time of my life. Allura is another reminder of that. I don't think I would've made it through those few years if it hadn't been for her.” and there's the mushy gushy stuff Lance hated so much.

Maria asks Allura a few questions and conversation begins to bore Lance. He finally notices the large scar across Shiro's face and he notices a few small ones covering his neck and arm, the only part of Shiro's skin Lance can see. He really wonders how bad the accident was.

“Lance?”

“Huh?”

“The waitress asked if you wanted more water.” his mom snaps, warning written across her face.

“Oh, yeah, please, thank you.” he nods, handing the cup to her.

“Are you okay?” Keith whispers around a spoonful of peas.

“Yeah, just thinking.”

“About?”

“His accident.”

"Oh.” Keith doesn't say anything else and the rest of dinner is uneventful. As much as Lance wanted to say they went out to have fun that night, they just went to their room and watched movies with Beto and Milo.

Often times, Lance forgot Beto was nineteen already and not twelve anymore. So every time he asked a stupid question during the movie Lance felt compelled to shout shut up you're like twelve.

Of course, Milo always beat him to it.

And by midnight they were all snoring except Lance. The tv was playing on mute still and Lance tossed and turned in the bed, vaguely aware of a sleeping Keith beside him. He gave off way too much body heat and Lance hated it. Groaning, he kicked the blanket off and rolled out of bed, crawling to the window that stretched from floor to ceiling. Looking out, he could see the large pool below them. It looked like a giant lagoon with several colorful water spouts throughout the shallow end. The lights in the pool twinkled with each ripple on the surface and Lance let out a heavy sigh.

His heart was racing and he had no idea why. He felt nervous, scared, he... he was having a major anxiety attack, wasn't he? The fear of everything suddenly hitting him and the urge to cry building in the back of his throat. He could feel his eyes stinging and ready to spill when the sound of somebody groaning made him spin around too quickly.

“Lance?”

“Y-yeah, Keith?”

“Mhm,” said person groaned, pushing up on his elbows and rubbing his eyes to look at Lance. “What are you doing over there?”

“I was looking at the pool.”

"Look at it in the morning, go to... sleep.” his words are interrupted by a yawn and Lance finds himself smiling.

“Alright, I'm coming.” Lance sighs, grabbing the remote off the table and shutting the tv off before laying back down. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, love....” there's silence and suddenly Keith is sitting up right in a start. “You! I meant you, love you, heh, oh my god.” Keith slaps a hand over his mouth and Lance stares with wide eyes while Beto and Milo shuffle around in their bed, Milo muttering a sleepy shut up.

“Go to sleep.” Lance whispers behind a smile. Keith looks mortified but he lays back down with another apology then rolls onto his side, back to Lance. Lance finally manages to get some sleep after that.

They're woken up to the loud banging on the hotel room door, Hunk's shouts muffled on the other side. Lance is vaguely aware of the body his limbs are wrapped around, his face buried against the neck of... of Keith.

With a start, Lance shoves Keith away and rolls backwards himself. Keith tumbles off the bed, head banging into the bed side table and Lance falls backwards off the other side of the bed.

“Lance, what the fuck?!” Keith screams, sitting up on the floor and rubbing his head, Beto cackling as he holds his phone in shaky hands and Milo lets Hunk into the room.

“I told you he'd d-do that.” Beto cries between laughs, dropping his phone to the bed and both Lance and Keith glaring daggers at him. Pidge arrives later that day with her parents and Matt. The day is spent exploring Orlando and finding wedding presents for Shiro and Allura. Lance is hell bent on buying them a Dance Dance Revolution set but they settle on buying them a coffee machine, bed spread, salt lamp and a box of mac n' cheese, something about an inside joke Shiro and Keith had.

The following day Keith's parents get to town and Lance hasn't seen Maria so frantic since Mila's own wedding.

“Lance! Tuck your shirt in from the back!” she snaps, Lance groaning, setting his hairbrush down to tuck the tail of his blue button up in. Keith is in a similar shirt but his is red instead and his hair is slicked back to make it look more appropriate. Hunk has on a white button up and Pidge was forced into a pretty purple dress with black flats. The church service goes by faster than Lance expected and then they're at the reception. Lance and Keith's family sharing a table while Pidge and Hunk's family share another.

The first dance is beautiful, especially with the way Allura's dress swings around the both of them. The sleeves are see through with jewels decorating them and it's cut low to expose her back. Her hair is pinned up into a bun with curls draping around it and two perfect curls framing her face. After Shiro and Allura share their dance a man with ginger hair takes Allura for a dance and Shiro's mom joins him. The dance partners are exchanged several times, Maria going up to dance with Shiro at one point as well.

“I'm gonna go get a drink.” Lance announces, leaving the table and finding the bar, Keith joining him. They grab two beers and head back to the table to wait for their meals.

Shiro sits with them for a few minutes every now and then, Allura checking on them often as well. The wedding is just like he remembers Mila's, only this time Lance is allowed to drink.

Half way through the night Lance has had more alcohol than he realizes and while he's dancing, he stumbles, laughter erupting from him every time he bumps into somebody. Several girls practically cling to him until Keith pulls him aside and pulls him out into the garden behind the building where the reception was being held.

“Lance you're drunk off your ass.”

"Your ass.” Lance giggles, holding his cup up ready for another sip only for Keith to snatch it away and dump the rest of it. “You ass.” Lance gasps, turning to face the stern look on Keith's face.

“You need to cool it on the drinks, I don't want you ruining Shiro's big night—Lance what are you doing?” Keith stutters, stepping back and hitting the railing of the bridge they were standing on, Lance leaning closer. He grabs the railing on either side of Keith and tilts his head to look closer at Keith.

“Your eyes are purple, I never noticed.” Lance whispers in awe, Keith forcing a laugh.

“They're not purple, it's just them reflecting the color of the ligh—” his words are cut off by Lance's lips on his own. There's a moment of hesitation and then Keith is slipping into the kiss. Lance is drunk and sloppy and the kiss is wet and filled with several smacking noises. There's tongue against lips, against teeth and against the others tongue. Keith's hands on Lance's hips and they're kissing like their lives depend on it.That's when Lance's hands find their way to the Keith's belt and undo it, then they undo the button and zipper on Keith's slacks and sudenly Lance's hand is in Keith’s boxers.

**“L-Lance.” Keith breaks the kiss, hand grabbing Lance's wrist to stop any more hand motion, lips still gliding together and both panting. “Stop we're in the garden. Don't.” he's not sure if he's actually trying to stop Lance, especially when his grip on Lance's wrist loosens and Lance's hand starts moving again. A moan escaping Keith's lips and hands flying back to grab the railing for support.**

**“Nobody's out here...” Lance whispers, lips leaving behind sloppy kisses as they trail down Keith's jawline to his neck, his hand rubbing gentle circles over Keith's bulge.**

**“L-Lan—fuck.” Keith breathes, body shivering and head tilting back for Lance's lips. There’s a quick kiss to Keith’s neck then Lance is dropping down to his knees and Keith feels his heart jump into his throat. His slacks and boxers are pulled down, erection fully exposed for a fraction of a second before Lance's lips are on it. “Fuck...” there's a grunt from Keith and his knees feel weak as Lance's head bobs up and down his erection.**

**Several minutes of slurping noises, muffled fuck's and moans later and Keith let's out a whine, hand reaching out to grab a fistful of Lance's hair. “I'm gonna... Lance I'm—nngh.” Lance pulls back when Keith cums into his mouth, gagging noises filling the air around them. They sit in silence for a minute, Keith's heavy panting the only noise other than the muffled thump of music from inside.**

Finally, Lance pushes Keith's boxers and slacks back up, zipping them and climbing to his feet and cupping Keith's face. “Do you want to leave?”

“Y-yeah.” Keith breathes out, lips pressed to Lance’s in a gentle kiss. After that kiss, Lance laces their hands together and they head inside, they tell their parents they're heading back and then they're getting in the car, Keith grabbing the keys and driving. They drive for a few minutes before Lance sits up excitedly and points at a store. A sex store.

“We have to stop there, we need things.”

“What could we possibly need?!” Keith stammers but still pulls into the parking lot.

“Lube, hand cuffs, condoms, I could buy something to spank you with,” Lance grins, wiggling his eyebrows at a flustered Keith.

“N-no, don't do that.” Keith doesn't sound convincing to either of them.

“Wait here.” Lance demands, climbing out of the car with his wallet in hand and stumbles into the shop. He comes back out ten minutes later with a shopping bag and then he gives Keith directions to a hotel that isn't theirs. “We can't go back to ours, Beto and Milo sleep in there with us.” and with that, Lance goes into the lobby, books them a room and leads Keith into the hotel room.

“I'm... not, Lance you're drunk.” Keith announces when Lance pulls lube and condoms from the bag.

“So?”

“So, this is like... not consensual.” Keith states, hands flying around to signal the bag and Lance and the room around them.

“This is me consenting. And this is me,” he stops to pull out a paddle from the bag and Keith lets out a muffled cry, “saying I'm going to spank you harder if you keep disobeying me.”

“Oh my god, Lance don't say stuff like that.”

“Are you talking back to me?” Lance breathes, stepping up to Keith, hand falling to rest on his lower back and pull them closer. His breath smelling of alcohol and Keith isn't sure what to say.

“I—don't know?” he admits, Lance makes a few tsk tsk noises and shakes his head.

**“Talking back is what bad boys do.” Lance whispers, pressing his lips to Keith's. And the moment Keith kisses him back Lance swings the paddle forward, spanking Keith and earning a yelp from him.**

**“L-Lance!” Keith cries out, hands reaching up to clutch Lance's shoulders and push him back. Lance let's out a howl of laughter and tosses the paddle to the bed.**

**“Come on, I'll hand cuff you to the bed even, it'll be hot. Could a drunk man think this clearly?” Lance laughs, undoing his shirt and tossing it aside. Keith stares in slight embarrassment as Lance undresses himself, shoes being kicked off and pants slipping down his long legs to pool at his feet. “Are you just gonna leave me here waiting or what?”**

**He's not sure how, it's kind of a blur, but Keith ends up on the bed, on his back and stripped naked. His hands held above his head in one of Lance's hands and the other gliding over his chest while they kissed. Then Lance's hand disappears from his chest and there's a sharp scriiink noise as the hand cuffs closed around Keith's wrists and one of the bars on the headboard.**

**“Lance are you sure that's safe?” Keith asks in a worried town as he pulls at his hands, unable to slip them out of the cuffs and suddenly feeling trapped and vulnerable.**

**“Totally, now, just let me do all the work, okay? Have you... uh, virgin?”**

**“What?” Keith snickers at the phrasing of the question. “Yes, I'm a virgin, so... so go easy on me.” Keith answers, swallowing hard when Lance climbs off his hips and climbs between his legs instead.**

**“I'll be gentle.” Lance nods, grabbing a condom and rolling it on himself then grabbing the lube. He coats a finger in the stuff then grins at Keith. “Just relax, okay?” Keith nods and when Lance's finger touches his hole, he lets out a gasp and his hips shift up. “Hey, I haven't even put my finger in yet, relax there mullet head.” Lance chuckles. Reaching out to rest a hand on Keith's abdomen and slide it around in soothing circles, his finger working it's way around Keith's hole.**

**There's three things Lance realizes. One, Keith is a very vocal person. He doesn't seem to stop moaning and groaning as Lance fingers him. Two, Keith looked kind of hot squirming around like that. And three, he was totally fucked because he wasn't all that drunk anymore.**

**He works his fingers around inside Keith until he can fit three in there comfortably then he pulls them out, rubbing some lube onto his penis and positioning his tip at Keith's entrance. “Hey, look at me, Keith?” said person forces one eye open, chest rising and falling as he gives a small nod of his head. “Just remember, relax.”**

**“Mm.” and slowly, Lance slides into Keith, hands gripping Keith's thighs and pausing when Keith let's out a rather loud cry.**

**“Did that hurt?”**

**“Y-yeah.” Keith nods, hand cuffs rattling as he tries to pull his hands down. “Go—keep going, I'm fine.” he pants and Lance does as he's told. He pulls out slowly then goes back in with a bit more speed, Keith letting out a strangled cry and then minutes later Lance is thrusting into Keith with more speed, the headboard smacking into the wall with each movement. Keith's moans are consistent, the occasional loud whimper or Lance's name filling the room.**

**There's the occasional pause where Lance will lean down to kiss Keith gently and whisper loving words to him before continuing. There's loving touches across Keith's chest and abdomen, over his thighs, across his cheek and soft finger tips gliding over his lips.**

**“L-Lance... I lo— _hnng_ , I'm—” Keith's words run off into deep moans as Lance picks up the speed, and then they're both cumming. Keith pulls hard against the cuffs, toes curling and hips bucking while Lance falls against him, arms resting on the mattress on either side of Keith. Lance stays on top of Keith for a moment, panting against his neck to catch his breath.**

**And he's very, very aware of how not intoxicated he is now. Regret sets into the pit of his stomach and his mind is already racing at how he was the one to take advantage of Keith. “I'm sorry.” he breathes against warm skin, placing a kiss there and finally sitting up, pulling out of Keith. He grabs the key to the cuffs and quickly undoes them, tossing them to the side and looking at Keith's exhausted face. He doesn't move, just let's his arms drop to the pillow above his head with a sigh.**

“That was.... nice.” Keith whispers, eyes still shut but head tilted up as if he were looking at Lance.

“Yeah. Do you want to shower?”

“Together?”

“U-uh?” Lance stumbles to find an answer but Keith laughs and shakes his head.

“I'll shower in the morning, get up early so we can head back. We can tell our families we went to Denny's and ended up falling asleep in the car?” Keith offers and Lance nods, it was believable.

“Alright.”

“Lay down. With me?” Keith finally opens his eyes and Lance's heart does a little dance. His eyes were definitely a shade of purple or maybe Lance was suddenly going color blind. He nods numbly though and climbs off the bed, tossing the used condom in the trash before going back to the bed and pulling the blanket back. He climbs in and Keith immediately curls up against him. Fuck. Keith was warm, really warm and Lance was very, very not drunk and would very much remember the entire thing in the morning.

When Keith's breathing evens out and the clock on the night stand reads two hours later, Lance slowly slips from the blankets, he freezes when Keith's hand stretches out and pulls a pillow to his chest. Sighing, Lance pulls on his clothes and shoes and leaves the car keys for Keith. He stumbles out of the hotel room and he's vaguely aware of a few things. Shiro would murder him if he ever found out what happened. His parents would murder him before Shiro. Keith's parents would probably also murder him. He could pretend to not remember the whole night. He could say he remembers but it meant nothing. He knows he's an absolute idiot, the biggest one to walk the Earth since it's creation.

Their actual hotel is only a fifteen minute walk away as it turns out and he ends up by the pool, shoes off his feet, slacks rolled up and water up to his calves. Stupid. Stupid. So fucking stupid.

He sits there until sunrise, until his phone lights up with Keith's picture and name and until his phone flashes a missed call from Keith. He sits by the pool until employees start showing up to open the umbrella's and get the fountains running. He sits there until he sees the rental car he and Keith used, pull up in the parking lot, then he walks out into the lobby to wait for him.

“Lance? How'd you? Why are your feet wet?”

“I was at the pool.” Lance mumbles, pointing behind him, Keith glancing back before reaching out to grab Lance who reflexively pulls away, startling both of them. “Sorry, I'm... I'm kind of sore, I'm not sure why.” there it was... Lance didn't remember.

“You don't... you don't know why?” Keith asks and the hurt in his voice makes Lance hesitate.

“No.” he hesitates for only a second. “No, I woke up out on one of the pool side chairs, weird huh? Must've been one wild party last night.” Lance laughs, Keith looking on the verge of tears.

“Yeah.” and then he's brushing past Lance, shoulders colliding roughly. Lance follows behind him into the elevator and then they're heading to their room. “I don't have a key.”

“I don't either.”

They stand there for a minute before Keith starts banging on the door. “Milo! Beto, open the door! Hey! Wake up, the sun is shining, the birds are singing the damn morning away. Get your lazy fu—”

“Keith!” both boys jump at the sound of Maria and suddenly Keith's fist is frozen mid knock. “Lance, oh, where did you two boys go? We called you several times but neither answered.”

“Denny's.” Lance quickly blurts, not realizing one of two things. That was the exact excuse Keith and him had agreed on, this he did realize after he blurted it out. The one thing he didn't realize was that Keith would remember that too.

“We fell asleep in the parking lot.” Keith finishes in a monotone, the door to their room opening to show a still half asleep Milo. Keith pushes past Milo and slams the door before Lance has a chance to walk in too.

“Lance... what did you do to that poor boy?” Maria's tone is a warning and her hands are on her hips and Lance knows no amount of lying is going to get him through this.

“I hurt him.”

“What?”

“Mom, I used him.” Lance whispers, his breathing picking up in a panic. “I'm a horrible person, ma, I used him.” Lance cries out, hands trembling and eyes blinking too fast to actually see. “I hurt him and I—I...”

“Lance, shh, mijo it's okay, calm down.” she coos, pulling him into her arms, planting a kiss on his cheek and running a hand over his hair. “What exactly happened?”

“I... promise you won't hate me?”

“I love you no matter what.” she promises and Lance rests his cheek against her shoulder, heart racing in his ears.

“I took his...his...” he can feel his mom tense, he doesn't have to finish his sentence before his mom is crying with him. “Mama, I messed up.”

“What did you do afterwards? This morning, did you tell him it was a mistake?” she questions through tears and Lance feels more ashamed than he did when actually lying to Keith's face.

“I left in the middle of the night. I told him I didn't... I didn't remember anything.”

“Mijo... why?” Maria cries, tears streaming down her face and Lance begins to sob.

“I—I don't kn-now, I don't know.” he cries, clutching the back of his moms shirt, shoes now on the floor long forgotten. “I don't know.”

“Tell him the truth.”

“I can't.”

“You can and you will.” she demands through a sniffle, pulling away from the hug. “I'm not angry Lance, I'm just disappointed.” and that hurts more than any shouting she could've done. She disappears back into her room and Lance sits in the hall until Milo opens the door again two hours later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Hides face in mortification* this is the first ever smut I've written and I'm??? Ho man wow. 
> 
> Also Halloween Horror Nights in Hollywood is noooooot that scary. I mean, it's scary but Keith, Hunk, Pidge and Lance are being babies when they say never again. Also yes Lance alternates between saying mom, ma and mama. He'll normally use mom or ma but if he's upset he'll use mama.
> 
> Annnnnd yes, Keith did almost in fact say I love you while they were doing it. Rip Keithy Boy.
> 
> Anyway!! Okay I'm updating this fic again on Thursday as a treat. Because this chapter is just pure smut and I know some of my readers prob didn't feel comfortable with it so I'll give a quicker update as a sort of apology. .


	5. When We Were Twenty-four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> R.i.p

_When we were twenty-four and you told me you loved me... and I left._

 

* * *

 

Lance never does tell Keith the truth, at least, not right away. Although, he suspects Keith knows the truth from the cold shoulder he gets. Pidge is the one who asks Keith about his light limping the next day and all he says is he fell. Lance would've laughed if the answer hadn't sounded so angry. The rest of the trip is filled with no words from Keith and disappointed looks from his mom.

Their fourth year of college starts a few weeks after Shiro's wedding and Lance isn't sure how to fix things with Keith. There's hardly any words between them and Hunk questions it.

“I fucked him.”

“You mean fucked up?”

“No.”

“Dude...” Hunk whispers, Lance nodding slowly.

“I also fucked up but... you know.” Lance sighs, kicking his feet up on their living room coffee table.

“When?”

“At Shiro's wedding.”

“ _At_?!”

“Well, no not technically. I gave him a blow job at the wedding and then we went to a sex shop and bought some stuff then got a hotel room and then I fucked him. I took his virginity.” Lance breathes with a sour laugh.

“So what exactly did you do wrong... don't tell me you told him it was a mistake.”

“Worse.”

“How do you get worse than that?” Hunk asks in all seriousness and Lance winces at the question.

“You leave in the middle of the night then in the morning pretend to not remember.”

“That's fucked up, even for you Lance.”

“I know, Hunk! I know.” tossing his books to the side, Lance swings his feet up and lays down against the cushions. “I'm never going to be able to fix this.” he groans.

“Do you have feelings for him or anything?”

“No, that's the problem, I don't. I just... I was drunk when we started and then like half way through I realized I wasn't really that drunk and suddenly I was in a panic.”

“While balls deep in him?”

“Yeah while— _Hunk_ , god. This is awful, my mom knows. She's so disappointed, every time I go home she gives me this sad look and it kills me.” Lance cries, burying a pillow to his face.

“Why'd you tell her?”

“I can't hide anything from my mom, trust me, she would've figured it out somehow without me telling her if I hadn't told her myself.” Lance peeks out from behind his pillow and Hunk has that same look his mom does when he's around now. “Hunk you're giving me that look too. You're disappointed in me.”

“Hell yeah I am, you ruined our friend circle by fucking one of us.” Hunk snaps, his own homework now forgotten as well.

“Don't phrase it like that.”

“Fix it.”

“How?!”

“Lube, I don't know, _talk to him_?” Hunk suggests, knocking on his head with a roll of his eyes.

“Ugh!”

 

* * *

 

He doesn't talk to Keith until Halloween that year. Only because Hunk and Pidge want to get together and Lance doesn't want it to be awkward.

“We're going to Hunk's house to watch scary movies.” Lance tells him over the phone.

“No thanks.”

“Why not? We always do, it's not like you have other plans?” Lance doesn't mean for it to sound like that but it's too late to rephrase it.

“I don't know, I might go to a wedding and find a hot guy, fuck him then tell him I don't remember, oh but use our excuse when our parents ask where we were because I very clearly remember that part.” Keith growls into the phone and Lance groans.

“Can we meet up? Talk in person? Please?”

“Why?”

“I'm going to fix this.”

There's silence and then Keith sighs. “Where do I meet you?”

Half an hour later they're sitting outside of a Starbucks near the school, Lance having ordered them both a drink. Keith takes a seat and angrily starts sipping at his caramel frappuccino.

“I fucked up, that was stupid.”

“You don't say.”

“I shouldn't have pretended, I panicked. It... I thought it was better than telling you it was a mistake.” Lance is staring hard at his own drink, as if the whipped cream would somehow give him all the right words to say.

“Oh.” Keith mumbles around his straw, taking a long gulp. “I would've preferred the truth.”

“That I regretted it?”

Keith seems to think that over for a moment before nodding. “Yeah. Lance you... well, you were my first and the idea that the first person I ever slept with forgot was pretty devastating.” Keith explains, setting his cup down and drying his hands against his jeans. “It sucks that the person who was my first regrets it but then again most people regret their first time. I prefer that to forgetting it.”

“I didn't think about it that way.”

“I don't think you were thinking at all.” Keith agrees, swirling his straw to mix the whipped cream into the rest of his drink. “It sucks how often you do shit that pisses me off but I always let it go.” Keith admits.

“What, why?”

“I don't know, really. Maybe because you're my best friend? I don't know but I never hold anything against you for long. Like the Halloween thing with Nyma... I was over it like three days later.” Keith's eyes look... disappointed. Lance is over it, he's over people being disappointed in him.

“I'm sorry. I won't do anything stupid like that again, can we... agree to go back to just friends, that night was great but...”

“But you don't have feelings for me, I know, it's fine. I don't mind just keeping the memory but still being just friends, I wouldn't have it any other way.” and then Keith is on his feet. “I have to go but I'll be at Hunk's house for Halloween, thanks for clearing everything up.”

“Yeah... no problem, see you Sunday.” Lance waves and he sits outside of Starbucks until his drink is gone. He sits there until the sun starts to set and he doesn't leave until he convinces himself everything was fine. He'd fixed things, he'd told the truth. There was nothing there, no feelings on either end.

 

* * *

 

Halloween is still awkward. Pidge is unaware of the tension but Hunk occasionally makes jabs at their incident from the wedding night. And every time Keith and Lance accidentally reach for the popcorn at the same time there's a few seconds of stuttered apologies before Pidge tells them to stop acting like high school sweet hearts.

Keith doesn't tag along for the holidays that year. He has too much homework, too many internship applications to do. Too much to do. Lance accepts it.

Things don't seem to go back to normal until after graduation. The ceremony is big, Lance's entire family comes to town and at graduation they cheer on Keith when he walks across the stage too. Keith feels famous for those thirty seconds that all of Lance's relatives cheer for him. And he feels more loved than usual when he gets graduation presents, money, hugs and kisses. Tia Karen pulls him aside and Lance can't help but wonder just what they always talked about.

The after party at Lance's house feels like Christmas. There's food and presents everywhere, kids screaming and the house is packed.

“I'd like to make a toast!” the dining room and living room fall silent as Maria and Hector stand between the two rooms. Keith is sitting with Chicharo reading over a NASA magazine and Lance is talking with Tio Beni when all eyes turn to Lance's parents. “To my son Lance, for making it through college, for getting a job with the Marine Life Research Association right out of college. I've never been more proud of you, Lance.” Hector finishes and a chorus of cheers follows before Maria raises her glass as well.

“And I would like to make a toast for our other boy, Keith.” Lance's face falls for a split second and his eyes focus on Keith across the room as he seems to light up with embarrassment. “He might not be our son by blood but Keith will always be part of our family. We've watched this boy grow up from a little nine year old to the wonderful young man he is today. Keith, we very much love you.” there's cheers and howls of congratulations and Keith's face is a bright red. Maria makes her way to Keith and pulls him into a hug filled with cheek kisses. Lance loves seeing Keith so comfortable with his family.

Once his mom leaves Keith's side Lance makes his way over and sits on Chicharo's other side. “What are you guys up to?”

“Keith is telling me about NASA thinking about fixing Mars so it can sustain life!” Chicharo chides excitedly.

“Yeah but that'll take years, probably longer than we'll be around for.” Keith adds.

“Yeah but that means my kids can live on Mars maybe!” Chicharo exclaims.

“Whoa, wait. Since when do you want kids?” Lance asks with a huffed out laugh.

“I dunno.”

“You're like twelve, literally, just last week you said girls were gross and boys were boring.” Lance goes on, Keith resting his cheek in his palm with a smile.

“Yeah but last week Jenna didn't try to hold my hand! She did yesterday and it made my palms sweaty,” Chicharo explains in a tone that could only be described as terrifying coming from a twelve year old. “And my tummy felt weird but that might just be because we'd just had lunch.”

“You _scandal_...” Lance breathes, “I'm telling mom you have a crush.”

Lance has never seen Chicharo's head snap up so fast and his eyes so wide. “No! Don't!” or talk that loud.

“Hey, dude, hey calm down, I'm just teasing.” Lance quickly assures his brother, ruffling his hair.

“That's why he likes me better.” Keith quickly throws in, pulling Chicharo's face to his chest and frowning at Lance. “Don't talk to me or my son ever again.”

“He's not your son, that's my brother and you're a meme.” Lance deadpans, his brother sticking his tongue out at him from behind Keith's hand.

“Don't talk to me or my second dad ever again.” Chicharo adds blowing a raspberry at Lance and spit flying everywhere. He then pushes out of Keith's grip, excuses himself and makes a beeline up the stairs.

“He really likes you.” Lance comments, staring after his long gone brother.

“I'm glad, I like him a lot too. He's like the little brother I never knew I wanted.”

“My whole family really loves you.” Lance notes. “Are you gonna tell me what you and my Tia Karen talk about now or...?”

“I'll tell you when we're twenty-four. Promise.” Keith stands to leave but Lance grabs his wrist to stop him.

“My twenty-fourth birthday or yours?”

“Whichever comes first.” They both pause at that. Keith suddenly realizing how stupid that response was. Lance's birthday was in February and Keith's in April. Lance's birthday would always come first. “That was...”

“Stupid?”

“Yeah.”

“My birthday it is then.” Lance grins.

 

* * *

 

After graduation things get quiet for all of them. Lance starts his job at the lab, studying the marine life they're protecting and researching. Keith opens up a mechanic shop and he hits the ground running when his business really, really picks up. Hunk gets a job for a local computer company. He fixes their software, programs and starts to movie up in positions quickly. Pidge is still in college, she lives on campus and they all get together often still but spontaneous road trips rarely happen after they all graduate.

Holidays are back to normal for them though. Halloween is spent at home with the same old horror movies and the same old snacks.

Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years are different though. Lance's family goes out of town as usual but Lance's work keeps him at home. He spends the holidays with Keith, Hunk and Pidge's families though. They even keep up his family traditions for New Years.

Soon they're twenty-three and Lance is more submerged in his work than ever before.

Despite living with Hunk they start to see each other less and less. Keith and Pidge are rarely ever seen anymore either unless it's a holiday or Pidge uses the spare key Lance and Hunk keep above the door frame.

Life is busy and hectic but it's normal for Lance. At least, until January before his twenty-forth birthday. He's offered the opportunity to travel for the labs research. It's a three year commitment though and he leaves at the end of February, if he does accept.

_I'll um...I'll need a few days to think about it._

“You have to take the job!” Hunk shouts while shaking Lance back and forth like his life depends on it.

“Hunk I can't just leave you though.” he sounds genuine and slightly upset. “And it's three years, I'll be gone for three whole years!” he adds as an after thought.

The shaking stops and Hunk lets go of his friend, moving to sit on the couch and press his index fingers together in that nervous way he always did. “I have something to tell you.”

“You're the real zodiac killer and I'm your next victim?”

“What?”

“Nothing, continue.” Lance laughs, sitting on the coffee table to face Hunk.

“You remember how I applied for that Google Software Maintenance job?”

“Yeah, you were so hyped about it, I was sure you'd get the job.” Lance nods.

“Well, I got a better offer from Google after they saw my experience and resume and all that. I haven't accepted it yet but if I do I'd be moving out to Mountain View around April.” Hunk's smile is small and Lance can only stare with wide eyes.

“Up near Palo Alto?”

“Yeah.”

“Dude that's great, when did they offer you the job? Why did you wait so long to tell me?” Lance's arms flail around as he asks and Hunk flops back against the cushions.

“I didn't want to leave you either but dude, now that you have an offer too I'm realizing we can't and shouldn't hold each other back. We'll still have skype and texts and calls and even the mail if it comes to that.”

Lance wants to frown and pout but he knows Hunk has a point. “Right. Well, I mean, I guess I'm taking the offer then. I'm really excited. You know I'll get to live in Cairns, Australia? And getting paid for it too.”

“I know Lance and I'll be working at my dream job.” Hunk grins

Lance has his mom, dad, Beto, Yahira and Chicharo sit in the living room when he makes the announcement.

“So I have some exciting news I think you guys are gonna love.”

“You're finally getting married?” Yahira throws out, Beto fist bumping her and both earning a sour look from Lance.

“Funny, no. I'm gonna be moving to Australia for the next three years for my job. I got an offer to do research abroad for the lab and everything is going to be paid for.”

“Oh, Lance that's so exciting!” Maria congratulates first, jumping to her feet to hug him.

“I'm proud of you, mijo.” Hector adds in, patting Lance on the shoulder, Yahira and Beto coming up next.

“Way to go, that's actually better than getting married.” Beto teases, Yahira nodding as they hug him.

“Lance? Can you take me with you?” they all freeze when Chicharo asks this from behind his book.

“Chich? Why would you ask that? You're thirteen, you still need to finish school.” Lance whispers, moving to sit on the edge of the couch beside his younger brother.

“I don't want anybody else leaving. Beto is moving out next month and Yaha is almost going to college. Milo and Mila only visit during the holidays and even Keith doesn't come around as much. I don't want you to leave too.” Chicharo's face is still hidden behind his book but Lance can see the tears rolling down his cheeks to drip off his chin.

Leaning forward, Lance pulls the book away and pulls his brother into a hug. “Hey, I'm not leaving forever. My main job is here in Santa Monica. By the time Yaha goes to college I'll be back in town, you can move in with me then, yeah?”

“Lance.” Hector warns but Maria waves him off.

“Promise?” Chicharo asks, pulling away from the hug to look up at a smiling Lance.

“Promise.”

He has Pidge and Keith make time for a meet up after that and the next time all of them are free isn't until a week before his birthday and nine days before he leaves.

“So... now, don't get mad but I tried to tell you guys sooner but I'm leaving.” Lance tells them, Hunk faking a gasp.

“Leaving.... to?” Pidge questions slowly.

“Australia. For three years.”

“ _Three years_?” Keith shouts, all eyes falling to him before he apologizes and sits back. “Sorry, I just—for what?”

“My job. I was selected to do some research on this new species of fish they found out in Australia in the great barrier reef. And they said the research is probably going to take around three years, I'm also doing some work with other species while I'm out there.” Lance explains, Pidge's head nodding nonstop and a little worrying.

“That's actually really cool.” she finally speaks. “When are you leaving?”

“February 28th so like, you know, nine days from today.” Lance shrugs with a cheeky smile. “I tried to tell you guys sooner! Hunk has known since January when they offered me the job!” Lance quickly adds when both Keith and Pidge sit forward in their seats to glare at him.

“We're throwing you a goodbye party.” Pidge immediately throws out, Hunk and Keith agreeing.

“Alright, well my parents beat you to it. It's also my birthday party, family members are coming and all that.” Lance points out and they end up agreeing to go to Lance's house for the party.

It's filled with most of his relatives, and too many presents to count. There's plenty of laughing, congratulations and even Hunk is given going away presents even though he's got a few months before he leaves to Mountain View. Lance is eating a slice of cake when he sees his Tia Karen hugging Keith and he suddenly remembers the promise. Keith would tell him what they talked about on his twenty-fourth birthday.

 _Today_.

He waits for his aunt to leave before setting his cake down and making his way over to Keith. “Hey, wanna go outside with me for a minute?” Lance asks and he swears, for a fraction of a second, Keith's eyes light up in a way he's never seen before.

“Yeah.”

They head out the back door into the backyard and move to the bench swing under the tree, both sitting down and watching the sun go down slowly. “So I don't know if you remember at our graduation party you told me you'd tell me on my twenty-fourth birthday what you and Tia Karen talked about.”

“Mm.” Keith hums, swinging his feet and nodding slowly. “Yeah, I'll tell you.” Lance waits and Keith seems to be organizing his thoughts before sighing. “It was Christmas when we were nine, our first Christmas together. I noticed your aunt looking at a picture of her and this lady. I asked her about it and she started telling me it was her ex girlfriend, the woman she loved with all her heart. She told me about her sexuality, she's a lesbian and I started asking her how she knew and we talked about feelings and attractions. She asked me why I asked and I remember looking at you and she sighed and told me 'Lance, that boy will be trouble for you. Boys like Lance are always trouble, sometimes good trouble but usually bad trouble' she said she loved you, of course, but she could read people like a book. She warned me basically but I was nine, what did I know? I didn't understand.”

And suddenly Lance knows exactly where this is going and he regrets ever being so nosy about his Tia Karen and Keith.

“When we were ten, for Christmas and New Years we went to Tio Edgar's house and again Tia Karen asked me about you, and it became something she did every time we saw each other. She'd ask me about you and I'd ask her about her ex. Then when we were eighteen, the Christmas after that big fight over Nyma being bad for you, Tia Karen told me she got back with her ex.” Keith explains. Lance suddenly feeling jealous that Keith knew so much more about his aunt than even he did. “She said they fixed their problems, it took them ten years but they fixed it. We talked about you, about Nyma, the Halloween party the year before that. She hugged me that day, it wasn't the first time she'd hugged me but it was the first time I cried in front of her. She told me again, 'Boys like Lance will only cause you trouble, mijo, they'll only cause you trouble no matter how much you love them and they love you. Don't hold it against him'. And I didn't, I never did, I never could hold anything against you, remember?”

“I'm sorry.”

“Just listen.” Keith cuts him off, hands fidgeting in his lap. “After graduation she pulled me aside, gave me a present, congratulated me and then asked me about us. I told her about Shiro's wedding.”

“You what?!” Lance screeches, the swing lurching forward suddenly, causing Keith to grip the arm rest tightly.

“You told your mom and Hunk, I could tell Tia Karen.” Keith snaps.

“How do you know I told mom?”

“She's not very subtle Lance, that's probably why you aren't either.” Keith points out. “Anyway though, she repeated those same damn words again. That boys like you are nothing but trouble and I told her she was right but then she said something I didn't expect. She said girls like her girlfriend are just as much trouble and if she could handle it then so could I.”

“What does that...”

“She wanted us to date.” Keith states bluntly with a shrug. “Anyway though, we got to know each other well, we talked about cars sometimes, she's the one who inspired me to open my own shop. She gave me the idea when we were fifteen.”

“Can we take a few steps back, she wanted us to date?”

“Yeah.” Keith confirms.

“So you liked me? The whole time we were growing up? That's like... since we were nine? Keith that's fifteen fucking years—uh, that is if you still like me?” Lance stutters, suddenly kicking himself mentally at the memory of Shiro's wedding.

“I stopped entertaining the idea that we'd date after Shiro's wedding.” Keith sighed. “I got tired of it.”

“I'm sorry.”

“It's fine, it's not your fault.” Keith tells him, standing up and stuffing his hands into his pockets. “I'm gonna head back inside.”

“Alright.”

 

* * *

 

Lance's last two days in California go by in the blink of an eye. On the 28th he hugs his parents and siblings goodbye. He cuts Yahira some slack and actually calls her Yaha for once in their lives. It's a big moment of teasing and then Lance's mom is driving him to the airport with his three bags.

“Did you say goodbye to Keith, Hunk and Pidge?” she asks while they're speeding down the highway.

“Yup. Hunk I saw this morning before he left for work, Pidge I visited yesterday and Keith I haven't seen since my birthday. We said goodbye then though.”

“I'm still surprised.” Maria mumbles under her breath but Lance catches it.

“Surprised by what?”

“Oh... well, you and Keith.” she says it as if it were the obvious answer.

“Why?”

“You father and I always figured you two would... well, you know, end up together. Keith's parents thought so too.” Lance's blood runs cold at the statement and he has to force himself to not groan. “I'm sorry for bringing that up now.”

The rest of the ride is silent and when they get to the airport his mom helps him with his bags and waits around until Lance has checked his bags in and is ready to go through TSA. There's several minutes of hugging and his mom glances at her watch several times.

“Just wait a few more minutes with me, you're way early anyway.” Maria whispers, holding her sons hands and glancing around.

“Are you looking for somebody?” Lance asks, starting to look around too but his mom quickly snaps his attention back to her.

“No, no, you're fine, you're right, go get in line, I'm heading out.” she grins, hugging Lance once more and kissing his cheek. “Be safe, call me when you get there, okay?”

“I will ma, it's a sixteen hour flight though, so it'll be a while before I call.” he tells her, grabbing his carry on bag off the floor and heading to the check in line. There's only two people ahead of him and he can feel his heart racing already. He's nervous, he's traveling farther than he ever has before.

“Lance!” _fuck_.

Turning around, Lance sees Keith running at him, flowers in hand and his heart drops. His mom had been stalling. She'd been in on it, no wonder she had taken a few wrong turns on the way to the airport.

“Lance, wait! I—I'm not trying to stop you from leaving, I just wanted you to know the truth. I told you the other night that after Shiro's wedding I stopped entertaining the idea that we could end up together but... but that doesn't mean my feelings went away.” Keith looks more flustered than Lance has ever seen him and Lance is positive he looks like he's just been shocked himself.

“Keith...” he glances around and notices the two people ahead of him have already gone the first guard and several people were looking at them.

Keith ducks under the lines ropes and then he's standing in front of Lance, flowers held up between them. “Please go but... but know that I do still love you. I think I always will.” Keith whispers. Lance is sure Keith is about to kiss him when he notices his face getting closer. So he backs away.

“I have to go my flight is... soon, leaving I mean. I have to go.” Lance turns and hands the security officer his flight ticket and passport, he needs to go, he needs to get through the check in, he needs to get away from Keith. From here. _He needs to_.

The second he's handed his passport and ticket back, Lance all but bolts past the security officer to the conveyor belt. He tosses his bag up, his shoes, jacket and then he's walking through the full body scanner. He can still hear Keith.

“Lance! You coward. Fucking coward!”

_He hates it._

“Go on then, leave! See if I fucking care, I hate you Lance McClain!”

_It breaks his heart._

“ _Don't_ expect me to fuckin—let go of me! Let go— _Lance_! Fuck you!”

Lance wants to turn and look but he's sure Keith is being dragged out by security guards, he wants to look back or even go back and tell Keith something, anything... but he doesn't. He keeps walking until he's at his terminal and then he gets on his sixteen hour flight and he doesn't look back once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck Lance. Honest to god, just fuck Lance. I still love him but damn.... why. 
> 
> Okay.... anyway.... next update is on Tuesday! Next week is gonna be a double update again (Tuesday and Thursday) because chapter 7 is extremely short so I'll post that next Thursday. Then the following Tuesday will be the last chapter and that one is extremely long. Like 12k words alone I think? Chapter 8 is really long and the last so.... YEAH.


	6. When We Were Twenty-Seven

_And the one time you broke mine by moving on with my--_

 

* * *

 

 

“Ma? I just landed, it was a l—”

“I can't believe you.” Maria cuts him off, completely confusing Lance.

“Huh?”

“I can't believe... I did _not_ raise you this way Lance, you left that poor boy screaming at the terminal.”

“Ma...”

“No. Lance, I understand if you don't like him back but how could you not even say anything about it?” she sounds just as disappointed as she did the morning after Shiro's wedding. “All you can say is you have to go? Your father and I didn't raise you like that.”

“I didn't know what to say?”

“Maybe that you love him, that he's your friend but you do love him, just not the way he wants?” Maria suggests and Lance has to sit down before his legs give out.

“I've told him that before, ma. I just couldn't bring myself to say anything else, I was caught off guard. My life isn't a damn romantic comedy, I didn't sign up for that!” Lance exclaims, heart racing and mind spinning. “I didn't sign up for some love confession at an airport, I don't want that.”

“I just hope you don't come to regret it. Get your things and head to your new place Lance, get some sleep.”

“I love you ma.”

“Good night Lance.” he's not sure whether his mom avoids saying she loves him out of spite or to make him feel even more guilty. Probably both though, knowing his mom.

 

* * *

 

The first month in Australia is the hardest one. His sleep schedule is completely fucked. He's a day ahead, it's strange, he feels like he's missed an entire day. He ends up getting into a better sleeping schedule eventually though. He calls his family every morning and every now and then he'll accidentally call them when it's two in the morning their time.

By the time April rolls around and Keith's birthday comes up Lance still hasn't talked to Keith. He keeps up with Pidge and Hunk and they seem to know better than to mention Keith to him. He's kind of disappointed by that.

He sends Hunk a necklace and t-shirt from Australia for his birthday and he sends Pidge a mug that says the cliché “My friend went to Australia and all I got was this mug.” She doesn't complain.

He ends up working part time at a Sea Life Aquarium to complete some of the research he's doing. A new fish they found, it's quickly popping up in the waters around the great barrier reef and it seems to breath air as well as water. He tells his brother Chicharo about all his research each time they call and he's never felt closer to his little brother.

It throws Lance off when the seasons are nothing like they are back home. It never really gets _too_ cold, but during what should've been summer, it ends up being chilly. His co-workers tease him about how American he is, especially when he has to learn to use the Metric System instead of the English System for measuring. Several times he finds himself asking why the rulers and measuring tapes don't have inches on them. Eventually though, he gets the hang of. It only takes him about a year to stop referring to the English System.

During the holidays he'll call home and be on skype with his siblings for a while but it's never the same. Especially not when he notices during Christmas that Keith is in Chicago at his Tia Ramona's house. He ends the call a few minutes after that.

In January before his twenty-fifth birthday Lance is the one that discovers how the fish reproduce, oddly enough it's a mammal trait. They give birth to live fish and they learn how it's reproductive system works. They reproduce once a year, January is when the new fish are born and they seem to mate just a few weeks after that.

In February Lance gets several calls on his birthday. Some of his relatives accidentally calling far too early in the morning but he appreciates them nonetheless. He gets several gifts in the mail but nothing comes from Keith. No text, no gift, call, no like on his Facebook status. So he decides to completely get over it.

The days start to go by faster after that. He goes on the occasional date, nothing ever getting too serious. He starts to call his family and friends less and less as he gets wrapped up in his research and his job and new life.

During the holidays he only calls for about an hour before going off to celebrate with his new friends and by the time his second year in Australia ends Lance calls his family once every week or every other week. His third and final year in Australia goes by faster than he would've liked. Sometime in June during his third year he's on a date with a girl named Zoey when he _thinks_ he sees... a familiar head of black hair in the form of a god awful mullet. He's sure his mind is playing a trick on him so he thinks nothing of it. He and Zoey break up a month before he leaves. The Aquarium sends some of the fish to the lab out in Santa Monica and then Lance is back on a plane, headed for home.

It's during his long flight that he spends that time wondering how things would be when he got back home. He knew Keith still attended the family get togethers, would he still do that once Lance was back? Had Keith let it go? Why was he so worried about it? It's also during this flight that Lance realizes Keith had unfriended him and unfollowed him from most social media. He can't see many updates on Keith's wall but the few he does see makes him have the smallest hope that Keith—that...

* * *

 

 _So I went to Chicago for the first time ever and?? It's so pretty during Christmas! I would've come in November for Thanksgiving but my job kept me back in Santa Monica. Shout out to_ _**Maria McClain** _ _for inviting me and to Tia_ _**Ramona Rodriguez** _ _for letting me stay at her house during the holidays. Love you guys! <3_

* * *

 

 _Today I took_ _**Yahira McClain** _ _and_ _**Chicharo McClain** _ _to the go cart race tracks and you guys will not believe how amazing these kids are at driving??? Chicharo had us both beat though._

* * *

 

 _**Emilia Miller** _ _and_ _**Cameron Miller** _ _asked me to babysit their three kids yesterday, Ramon, Clark (12, twins) and Tania (9) while they went out. Well, it was a three hour drive to their house, I got there at around two in the afternoon. Mila and Cam left at like four and I'm thinking this is going to be an easy night. Well, after dinner, around eight or so I'm helping Tania brush her teeth when the bathroom door shuts and I can hear the twins giggling. They put a chair on the other side of the door and did you guys know that ACTUALLY works? I don't have my phone so Tania and I sit on the bathroom floor playing patty cake for like four hours until we pile up the towels and just fall asleep. Mila and Cam get home at like one in the morning. Mila asks me to come downstairs, I've never seen a bigger disaster in my entire life. I now owe Mila and Cam a new couch and dining table, we still don't know how the twins destroyed both...._

* * *

 

_You ever wish you hadn't done/said that one thing to somebody and you kind of wish it was a dream but you know it happened and you just... yeah._

* * *

 

_It's amazing how fast time goes by and how much time can heal all wounds._

* * *

 

 _**Alberto (Beto) McClain** _ _started working at the shop and the amount of times he’s brought me coffee in the mornings is pretty great. He’s my new favorite McClain (sorry_ _**Chicharo McCalin** _ _)_

* * *

 

 _Public Service Announcement: my mom_ _**Chanci Shirogane** _ _is the best, she just got me a snow cone machine and?? I can now make snow cones at home._

* * *

 

 _**Alberto (Beto) McClain** _ _has practically moved into my house and he claims it’s bc we’re friend BUT I think its the snow cone machine_

 

* * *

 

 _Call out post for_ _**Takashi Shirogane** _ _and_ _**Allura Shirogane** _ _for not fucking telling me they were expecting a baby???? ?? You can't just mail me a baby shower invite when you're already seven months pregnant, I'm disowning you guys_

* * *

 

 _**Pidge (Katie) Holt** _ _is a real life troll, I've never screamed louder in my entire life. She just fucking crawled out from under my bed how long were you down there??? Pidge what the actual??? I wasn't home all day either??? How'd you even get in???_

* * *

 

 _Update:_ _**Tsuyoshi (Hunk) Garrett** _ _helped her break into my house, they ate everything in my fridge, used all my toilet paper, Hunk hid in my closet and Pidge under my bed and they waited until I got home to make me piss my pants. I almost kicked Pidge in the face._

* * *

 

 _**Alberto (Beto) McClain** _ _was here and he loves you Keith Shirogane_

* * *

 

Lance sees the several pictures Keith is tagged in with his family over the holidays, at family trips, taking the kids trick-or-treating. Keith seems to be everywhere that _Lance_ should've been. And it... warms his heart a little (if he ignores the burning jealousy). Lance remembers back to three years ago when he should've done something, said something to Keith. When he didn't do anything but walk away and listen to Keith call him a coward.

“ _Lance! You coward. Fucking coward!”_

Keith hadn't been wrong. Lance had been afraid, he hadn't been sure how to react so he didn't. He'd just left instead and he'd hurt not only Keith but himself.

“ _Go on then, leave! See if I fucking care, I hate you Lance McClain!”_

Did Keith actually hate him now though? It was something Lance had thought about several times during his first year in Australia. Did Keith actually hate him?

“ _Don't expect me to fuckin—let go of me! Let go—Lance! Fuck you!”_

Don't expect him to fucking _wait_. He's sure that's what Keith was going to say and he hopes he's wrong because Lance realizes at that moment how stupid he is. Eight hours and ten minutes into his flight back home Lance pulls out a piece of paper and pen and starts to write a letter for Keith. He's stupid. So stupid.

* * *

His parents are there to pick him up when his flight lands. Lance feels exhausted and it's two in the morning. Chicharo isn't there, he's at home sleeping, he's got school in the morning. Lance worries about how it's going to be seeing his brother after three years, he was seventeen now, it still blew his mind.

“Welcome home.” his mom smiles, kissing his cheek, his dad taking his carry on bag before they head down the escalators to the luggage pick up area. “How was the flight?”

“So long, my butt is numb.” Lance jokes, his mom giggling. After his luggage is grabbed they head home and Lance immediately crashes. Most of the rooms are empty and spare rooms now that most of his siblings have moved out. Chicharo has his own room, Yaha has her room for when she's home from college. Then there's five extra rooms, one that used to be his, one for Mila, Milo and Beto then the one room that used to be a guest room. All five are guest rooms now for relatives during the holidays.

In the morning, Chicharo wakes him up before school by jumping onto him and screaming.

“You're back!”

“Fu—Chich, yeah.” Lance laughs, rolling over and starting to tickle his brother.

“S-stop! Stop, Lance, I can't—no!” Chicharo shouts between giggles finally rolling off the bed and letting his laughter die out. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too little bro. I heard you're pretty kick ass at driving a race car?”

“Well, I mean it was a go cart but yeah. I beat Yaha and Keith pretty bad. Did Keith tell you about that?” he asks, smile on his face but his tone sounds cautious when he mentions Keith.

“No, I saw it on Facebook. Still proud of you.”

They head down for breakfast after that, his mom having made pancakes, eggs and bacon. They're in the middle of eating when the front door opens and in runs Tania, Clark and Ramon followed by Mila on the phone and a suitcase in hand.

“No! No, I told you, don't you dare. You have the weekend to fix this Cam, I swear to god!” she shouts, slamming the door and tossing her phone to the couch. She's quick to sit at the table and start grabbing for the food, Lance and his parents sitting in stunned silence.

“Mila...”

“I don't want to talk about it.”

“You will or you're leaving.”

“Ugh. Cameron and I agreed to let our mutual friend David crash at our place while he got back on his feet. That was a month ago, all he does is eat our food and play video games. Yesterday he started smoking _inside_ the house and I kicked him out. Cameron let him back in so I took the kids and left this morning. He has until Monday or I'm—I'm calling the cops on David's sorry ass.” Mila snaps, slamming a cup down and pouring orange juice into it.

“Huh.” Lance chimes, Mila suddenly turning her attention to him.

“Oh my god! Lance! You're back, I had no idea, I'm sorry this happens as soon as you get back, come here little bro.” she chatters excitedly, jumping up to pull Lance into a hug. “The kids missed you, you know. Clark, Ramon and Tania! Get down here.” she shouts, then all three come running down the stairs.

Several hugs and kisses later and the kids disappear back upstairs to continue playing with the game systems in the upstairs game room.

“How was Australia?” Mila asks around a mouthful of pancakes.

“It was nice. The seasons are weird up there, it was cold when it should've been warm and god, learning the metric system was an experience.” Lance laughs.

“Meet anybody while you were out there?” Chicharo asks.

“Uh, this girl named Zoey, we dated for eight months, didn't work out though.” he shrugs, finishing off his eggs.

“Fun.” Mila hums, setting her fork down and pressing her lips into a thin line. “Keith told us that he—”

“I'd rather not.” Lance cuts her off. “I'm not... in the mood to talk about Keith, please.”

“Right, sorry.”

The rest of breakfast is silent and Hector leaves for work around eight, taking Chicharo to school. Lance sits at the table, scrolling through his phone before finally grabbing his dishes to take into the kitchen.

“Pero, ama, I doubt Keith would've lied to us about that.” Lance pauses at Mila's words. “You saw the way Lance just shot down the conversation at the mention of Keith.”

“I know, but it isn't our place.”

“I'm just confused as to why Keith would do that!” Mila sounds like she wants to shout and Lance can already imagine the stern look on their mother's face.

“Keith was in a bad place at the time. His grandmother had just died and he was in the same town as Lance, you practically nagged him nonstop about going to visit Lance so I don't blame him for telling us that he did, even if he didn’t.” Lance drops his dishes and jumps back when they shatter. “Lance!”

He's standing by the kitchen doorway, broken dishes at his feet and his mom and sister staring at him. “Lance, what happened?” Mila's the first to move, she steps around the broken glass and moves Lance away from it.

“I don't... what do you guys mean Keith was in the same town as me?”

He watches his mom and sister share a concerned look and Mila starts to talk. “His grandmother died back in June. His family went out there for the funeral and he was near where you were working. He told us he had gone to visit you and I was the one doubting it.”

“Why didn't he actually go see me?”

“We don't know. That might be for you to figure out.” Maria sighs, disappearing into the kitchen before returning with a dustpan and broom. “Come on now, help me clean this up.”

The rest of the day is spent on a three way skype call with Hunk and Pidge. Hunk says he loves his job and his new apartment in Mountain View. Shay had moved out there with him and Hunk was planning on proposing soon. Pidge was living out in Orlando and working with Shiro and his company now.

“And um... Keith? Do you guys know what he's been up to?”

“Yeah, I actually talked to him yesterday.” Pidge nods into the camera. “He's still got that car shop obviously. His dad actually told him he should open up a second place, he's that busy.”

“He comes up here to visit pretty often, maybe once a month?” Hunk adds in. “He's got a house out near his shop though.”

“A house? Like... like three bedrooms, kitchen, living room, garage... kids and all that?” Lance questions.

“Kids? No, no way. But yeah, like a house, not an apartment.” Pidge confirms.

“So he's married?”

“No.” Hunk laughs and something about that gives Lance a spark of hope. Maybe he _hadn't_ completely fucked this up then.

“Cool, cool.... Pidge are you actually using the mug— _oh my god, you are!”_

“Shut up Lance!”

* * *

 Milo and Beto come over to visit a few times. Milo has been living with Vanessa, apparently

“So you’re working at Keith’s shop?” Lance asks one afternoon while Beto is over.

“Yeah.”

“How’s that?”

“Well, you know I didn’t go to college and Keith has always been interested in cars. He started teaching me the basics and I picked up pretty quickly. He offered me a job and that was that.” Beto shrugs, slumping down against the couch cushions.

“Hey Lance, has anybody told you about… Keith?”

“What, that he moved out? Bought a house, he’s not married? That he lied about meeting up with me in Australia?”

Beto’s expression is unreadable but his eyes are focused a little too hard on Lance. “No, and why do you sound so pissed that he didn’t actually meet up with you?”

“Because he should have? We could’ve fixed things if he had actually gone and talked to me while he was visiting.”

“Lance you don’t like him, you never have, what difference would it have made?”

“Well what if I do now? Maybe those three years away from me had me thinking.” Lance asks, sitting up and staring straight at his brother.

“You… like him now?” Beto sounds doubtful, especially when he scuffs under his breath and turns back to the tv. “You should just leave him alone.”

“Why are you acting all defensive?”

“Because Lance! Every time you hurt Keith I was there, mom was there, Pidge, even Chicharo! And he’s like half of Keith’s age!” Lance has never seen Beto look so… upset.

“Keith isn’t completely innocent here! I told him no several times in our lives and he never gave it up! He was practically asking for—”

“Shut the fuck up!”

They both sit in stunned silence, Beto now on his feet and glaring at Lance like never before. The only noise is that of the tv show.

“Beto—”

“No, like I said, shut up. Just… shut up.” Beto shakes his head, turning on his heels just as their mom peeks a worried head into the living room. Lance watches his mom whisper something and Beto shakes his head before they both leave the room.

* * *

 It takes Lance a full two weeks after the fight with his brother before he types out the letter and prints it off. He wants to tell him over the phone but he knows he can't give Keith the letter through the phone. He still calls him though.

“Hello?”

“Keith?”

“Who is this?”

_Oh my god._

“Wait... did you delete my number?!”

“... Lance?”

“ _Yes!”_ Lance sputters into the phone, a small laugh filling his ears seconds later.

“Sorry, no, I got a new phone last year and didn't transfer all my contacts. What's up?”

How was he doing that? Talking so casually like nothing bad had ever happened between them? “I was wondering if you wanted to meet up?”

“You're back already?” _what the fuck did he mean_ already _like it had only been a month?_

“Yeah. I got back March first.” Lance nods, forgetting Keith can't actually see him nod.

“Oh, then yeah, sure. Where did you want to go?”

“Is Baskin Robins okay?” _how fucking cliché._

“Yeah, that's fine, when?”

“Now?” maybe it was a long shot but Lance tried anyway.

“Yeah, that's fine. See you soon.” _fuck_.

The call ends and Lance finds himself slowly getting in his car and driving the fifteen minutes to the Baskin Robins they always went to. He doesn't wait long before Keith pulls up and he notices three things. One, Keith's hair is trimmed, it's not as long as it used to be. Two, Keith is the same height as him now. Three, his eyes still look purple to Lance.

“Hey.” oh, and four, he made Lance's pulse pick up.

“Hey.” Lance smiles back, both awkwardly standing there. “We uh, I can pay for the ice cream.” Keith blinks in confusion before looking at the building and things seem to click in his head.

“Oh! Okay, yeah if you want, thanks.” Keith nods and they head inside. As usual, they each get a cone with rocky road and then find themselves sitting in a booth. However, unlike every time they had been there before they don't sit beside each other, they each sit on opposite sides of the table.

“How was Australia?”

“Fun I guess. I mostly worked while out there, that fish we were doing heavy research on gives birth like a mammal, fucking crazy, right?”

“Is that possible?”

Lance grins with a nod at the question, “science.”

“Huh.”

“My mom and Mila told me you were in Australia back in June.” Lance brings up casually, Keith pouting his lips for a fraction of a second before nodding.

“Yeah.”

“Same town as me even. Why… didn’t you drop by?”

Keith shrugs, biting into his cone. “I didn’t see the point in it. No hard feelings, right?”

“Right.” That's when Lance reaches into his jacket pocket, hand closing around the envelope with the letter inside. He had to do it now, he had to. “Keith I—” Keith's phone ringing cuts him off. Keith shoots him an apologetic smile and answers it quickly, turning to the side.

“Hey, what's up?” his palms are sweaty but he's holding the envelope in his lap now. The minute Keith got off the phone Lance would hand it over to him. “Yeah, no I know, look just tell Mr. Jenkin's to wait, yes I'll be right over. Love you, see you in about half an hour.”

 _Love you_.

Lance's smile quickly disappears from his face and he's still frowning when Keith turns back to him. “Who was that?”

“What? Oh… it was Beto.” Keith shrugs.

“Why’d you say love you? Did you just start casually saying that to all my siblings?” he’s sure his tone sounds accusing but he doesn’t care.

“Occasionally I’ll tell others I love them, like Maria and Hector. But Beto I tell daily.”

“Why?”

“We’re dating.” Keith deadpans and Lance swears the world stops for a second.

“You… you’re dating _my brother_?” Lance assumes his tone sounds casual but he's pretty positive it sounds hostile.

“Yeah? It's not like I was dating anybody or anything and he was there when I needed somebody. He always was even before you moved.” Lance might've sounded hostile but Keith sounded down right murderous.

“When did you guys… start dating?”

“Last April, after my birthday. Things were said, things happened and he already had a key to my house so things just kind of fell into place.” Keith explains, twirling his cone in hand.

“If I hadn’t of just left that day at the airport would things be different? Did you… did Beto always like you?”

Keith seems to resist the urge to roll his eyes and Lance wants to shrink in on himself. “No, Beto didn’t always like me like that. We just spent a lot of time together after I hired him and things just happened. What you did at the airport… it just made me realize how stupid I was and how I needed to absolutely let things go.”

“That was stupid of me too.”

“Which part?”

“Everything. When we were nine, when we were seventeen, nineteen... twenty-one at Shiro's wedding.... when we were twenty-four and I left.” Lance mumbles, hand slowly crumpling the envelope under the table. “All of it, I was stupid the past eighteen years.”

“I can't believe I've known you that long. That's the age of a legal adult.” Keith mutters and Lance swears his heart stops at how casual Keith suddenly sounds. “Anyway though, it doesn't matter anymore. I let it go, I moved on, I’m happy now and you never had feelings for me.”

“Right, right. I should get going I promised Chich I'd... do something, I forgot. I have to go though.” Lance mumbles, ice cream cone in hand but no longer wanted. Sliding out of the booth, he pauses when Keith grips his wrist gently.

“What's that in your hand?”

Glancing down, Lance notices the envelope is clearly visible in his palm. “Just an apology letter, but I said everything out loud the letter does. It's just trash now.” he shrugs Keith's hand off and throws both his ice cream and the letter away.

The drive home is a blur. One minute he's in the Baskin Robins parking lot and the next he's in his parents drive way with a text from Keith...

_**It's best if we don't talk anymore outside of family get togethers.** _

… and a broken heart. He sits outside long enough for his mom to come out and tap on the window before pulling his door open.

“Lance, honey what's wrong?”

“I'm a god awful person mom.” Lance groans, hands curling tightly around the steering wheel.

“Explain.”

“Keith.”

“I can't argue with you there.” she whispers, Lance letting out a choked laugh and slamming his forehead against the horn, Maria jumps at the sudden sound. She reaches out and lifts his head up, hand cupping his cheek and sweet smile on her face. “What exactly happened?”

“I called him, we met up at Baskin Robins. I wrote him an apology letter. I listed the five times I remembered hurting him the most and then I told him how stupid I thought I was and how stupid I was for letting him go and not realizing I actually loved him, all in the letter. But before I could give him the letter his boyfriend— _Beto!—_ calls and I'm glad he did because what kind of fool would I have looked like if I had given him that letter three years too late?” Lance gasps for air after his rant, hands sliding off the steering wheel and a silent cry shaking his shoulders. “I fucked up so bad, ma. And he just texted me saying not to talk to him anymore, and—?”

If his tears hadn't been blurring his vision Lance was sure he could've seen the exact moment his mothers heart broke. He does however catch the very confused tone his mom uses when she mumbles an almost silent “Beto?” Soon he had his face pressed to her stomach, arms wrapped around her hips and her hands gently patting his hair. “It’s okay, Lance, shh, shh, it's okay.”

Shaking his head slightly, he wants to cry that it isn't okay. That everything is terrible, that he was going to grow old and alone because he was _stupid_.

“Listen, as your mother I want to tell you that none of this is your fault. But since I also consider Keith my son I feel obligated to tell you that karma is a very cruel thing, mijo.” she whispers and he's not sure whether that was meant to make him feel better or worse. “Things will work out in the end for you, they will. I promise. You have to make things work for you, don’t give up at the first sign of trouble.”

“It just... hurts. Of all people? My own damn brother?”

“I know, I know. Life is the hardest thing you'll ever experience, sweetheart. The hardest experiences in life are the ones that shape you the most.”

Lance finds it ironic really, mildly poetic even. Eighteen years down the road, five heartbreaks for Keith Shirogane and in the end it's Lance who feels like the world is ending.

Five times he broke Keith's heart and the one time Keith broke his by moving on with his brother.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING!!!!! I want you guys to realize you're only getting Lance's POV of this. You've _only_ gotten Lance's POV of this the whole time. There are SO MANY things you guys haven't been told that have happened behind the scene where Lance wasn't there. Like convos with Tia Karen. The 2 hours that Lance was locked out of the room. Convos with Maria. Convo's with Pidge and Keith. So many things you guys don't even know and that's what chapter 8 is.
> 
> Everything from Keith's POV where you get to see the little things that explain what exactly happened in this chapter. Sometimes, things aren't as they seem. This isn't the actual ending BUT if you want, you can read this as the "ending" and just assume Keith is with Beto and Lance is now miserable. But, if you continue reading chapter 8 is gonna explain the "real" ending. This is probably confusing but you'll understand once chapter 8 is up. 
> 
> Chapter 7 is gonna be up on Thursday btw and it's not like.... an actual chapter. It's just the letter that Lance wrote. Chapter 8 will be up next Tuesday!


	7. Letter to You

Dear Keith,

 

I know it's probably too late now. We're twenty-seven and it's been three years since we talked, since you told me you've loved me all your life and I broke your heart for the fifth time. Or at least, the fifth time that I'm aware of. I probably broke it more times than I realize, but these are the five times I remember and I want to apologize for them, tell you how stupid I am.

When we were ten and you kissed my cheek and I told you I didn't like boys.

When we were seventeen and I accidentally asked you on a date and instead introduced you to Nyma.

When we were nineteen and I cried on your shoulder because Nyma had left me and I said I was glad I found you, but only as my friend.

When we were twenty-one and I gave you a blow job at your brothers wedding, went to a sex shop then I took your virginity in a hotel room and left in the middle of the night, saying I didn't remember a thing in the morning.

When we were twenty-four and you told me you loved me... and I left.

I haven't seen you since that day but I can't imagine how much you must hate me. I've traveled a lot in these past four years and realized several things about myself. For starts, I'm gay as hell. Don't get me wrong, I still find girls attractive but I'm so into guys. More specifically, guys with ugly haircuts like mullets, guys with purple eyes that shouldn't exist, guys that are like two inches shorter than me but I can still pretend that I'm like a foot taller than them. Guys with awful fashion taste but they can somehow pull it off.

You.

I'm really, really into you, Keith. I realized this while in Australia, I realized this when you were the first and last thing I thought about most days. I realized this when I thought I saw you while I was on a date. I realized this when I was kissing Zoey but wondering how you were. What I'm saying is that I regret that day when we were twenty-four and I didn't say I loved you back. Or at least said something like 'I can learn to love you'. I know, it's stupid, I'm not good at apologizing, not really. I never have been so that's why I'm writing a letter instead of saying it out loud. I don't think I could. I'm sorry it took me this long to realize it, I know it's been obvious to everybody else. Tia Karen, you, my mom, Beto, everybody and I just didn't accept it. I didn't want to, I don't think so anyway but three years away from you made me realize it.

I'm sorry. I want to, if you're willing to of course, give us a shot.

I understand if you don't however.

 

With love,

Lance

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry the update is late in the day something happened irl and I just got home and stuff. I'm sorry. 
> 
> This is probably underwhelming but I hope you guys picked up on the subtle hints that Lance is feeling extreme guilt here. He think's he completely at fault, he's self-blaming, etc. It's subtle but it's there, next chapter we find out if Keith fishes this out of the trash to read or not. 
> 
> As always, thank you for the support, lovely comments, kudos, bookmarks, everything. Thank you for reading and enjoying my work, I appreciate each and every one of you.


	8. When We Were...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The facebook statuses are going to be in italics and centered.   
> This chapter is 12k words.... BTW

_Five times Lance broke Keith's heart and the one time Keith broke Lance's._

* * *

He's nine when his adopted family moves from Seattle to Santa Monica. He's lived with them since he was seven and it's taken him this long to accept that they really were his forever family. Sometimes he still writes Keith Kogane in school. Sometimes he still expects a social worker to show up and pick him up but when they leave Washington state for good, Keith knows this is his forever home.

He's nine when a random boy walks into his house and he spends the afternoon playing sprinklers with him, covered in mud and talking about aliens. He's also nine when he confesses to the boy that he's adopted, that he's afraid of his family not wanting him one day and that's also the same day the boy with the goofy grin tells him they're family now too and Keith decides he wants to hold onto that boy forever.

He's nine when he and his family go to the McClain house for Thanksgiving and Keith feels overwhelmed by everybody there. There's people everywhere he turns, music playing from each room and laughter echoing through out the house. Kids both older and younger than him ask him question after question and he can see Lance laughing from the corner as his relatives crowd him. He wants to hate the attention but it causes a warm, bubbly feeling in his chest to have people concerned and interested in him.

They spend Christmas that year at the McClain house too. Keith sits with his dad when his mom comes over in happy tears.

“Sandra, Maria's mom just referred to me as her daughter.” Keith's mom giggles, cleaning her tears away. Keith doesn't listen to what his dad says back, instead he notices a younger woman sitting on the couch just opposite of him, eyes trained on her phone screen and a hint of a smile tugging at her lips. So he makes his way over to the woman and glances at her phone.

“Who is that?” the woman jumps slightly at Keith's sudden question and her screen clicks shut.

“My... Keith, right?”

“Yes, ma'am.”

“Oh, please, I'm far too young to be a ma'am.” the lady chuckles, scooting over and patting the empty spot beside her. “Sit, we can talk.” Keith obediently takes up the space beside her and his eyes flash to the phone then to the woman's face. “That was a picture of me and the love of my life.”

“But it was two women.” and as soon as he says he Keith remembers Lance mentioning two of his aunts liked girls. This must've been one of them.

She laughs like Keith just told the world's funniest joke and it only serves to confuse him. “It was indeed. How old are you?”

“Nine.”

“Do you know where babies come from?”

“Mommies.”

“Alright, and do you know what marriage is?” she asks, eyes twinkling with determination and Keith decides he likes this woman already.

“It's when a mommy and a daddy love each other and they decide to spend forever together.” Keith tells her and the woman's smile and shake of her head makes Keith doubt himself. “Right?”

“Only partially. See, marriage constitutes—sorry, big words. Marriage includes two _people_ who love each other. Typically a man and woman, yes. But it can often be between two men or two women or even people who don't identify as either gender.” the woman explains and Keith's nine year old mind is thrown for a loop.

“There are people who aren't boys _or_ girls?”

“Yes, but that's beside the point. We're talking about marriage right now. The picture you saw was me and my girlfriend— _ex_ actually. Love is just between two people, you can love whoever you want.” she explains and suddenly everything seems to click into place for Keith.

“So I can like boys the way my mom likes my dad?” he phrases it more like a realization than a question but the woman nods. Keith already knew people could do that, Hunk had two moms, but... before this conversation the possibility had seemed impossible to Keith. Every foster home he had ever been to had a mom and a dad, never two moms or two dads. “How do you know?”

“How do I know what?”

“How do you know if you like boys or girls?” Keith asks, glancing up to the woman with the dark blue eyes.

“You feel it in your heart, in your tummy, your toes and fingers. You just know, the person makes you feel warm, happy, safe, _loved_.” the woman's tone is soft, a bit distant and Keith feels like he's intruding on a special memory for her.

“What's it called if somebody likes a person that's the same gender as them?”

“It depends, two women who love each other are lesbians, two men are gay, if you love the opposite gender you're straight but if you love both then you're bi. You can also be ace and not like any gender.” she explains, giggling at the way Keith stares with wide eyes. “You'll learn as you get older,” she smiles.

Keith wants to say he's straight like his parents but he finds himself staring at the boy with the goofy grin, the missing front tooth and the messy brown hair. He's only nine when he realizes he's anything _but_ straight. The hand on his shoulder jolts him back to the world of the living and the woman beside him is making a _tsk, tsk_ noise.

“Lance?” the name is phrased like a question and Keith pouts. How had she noticed? “Lance, that boy will be trouble for you. Boys like Lance are always trouble, sometimes good trouble but usually bad trouble.” she whispers and Keith feels his pulse pick up.

“What does that mean?”

“It means tread carefully, sweetheart. Very carefully.”

“What... what was your name again?”

“You can call me Tia Karen, alright?” her smile is warm and Keith wants to exaggerate the _ee_ sound in Tia but he smiles regardless.

“Thank you.”

“No, thank you for coming to talk to me. It was very much needed, I don't often get to talk this much.” she sighs, hands clasping together. “Now, do you want to go grab some cake with me or what?”

Keith definitely loved this woman already.

And that night, after Lance kisses his cheek in a hurry and Keith has gone home, he lays in bed, hand on his face and his face heating up occasionally as he thought about his conversation with Karen. It was okay for a boy to like a boy. And that was exactly what Keith thought he felt for Lance.

He really, really liked that boy.

* * *

“Huh? Oh, they're family traditions. The grapes are one grape for each month of the coming year, for good luck. And the suitcase is for good luck if we want to travel this coming year. The bucket of water is like throwing away bad vibes and the money in the envelope goes in the mailbox for better income.” Lance explains, Keith looking from him to his grapes, eyes lighting up with excitement.

“Oh. Do they work?”

“I don't know but my family thinks they do so I like participating.”

The count down from ten starts and Keith nervously grabs about five of his grapes. The second the cheering starts Keith is tossing grape after grape into his mouth. Pausing to chew on the five in his mouth and already reaching for the rest when Lance tells him to slow down.

His mind is racing as he slows down to swallow his mouthful of grapes and then moves on to finish them one at a time. Until his last grape slips from his fingers and he immediately panics. Lance tells him it's fine but he's sure it's a sign of trouble for the coming year. He's done for. He finds Maria and he's practically in tears when he's handed a new grape to eat.

“Am I going to have bad luck all year now? Or just in December or January or one month next year? How does that work?” Keith questions behind tears, Maria giggling.

“No, Keith, it's just a tradition. It won't affect you, I promise.”

He doesn't believe her.

* * *

He especially doesn't believe her when he's left standing at the end of Lance's driveway in June. His heart racing and bottom lip trembling. He sees the small movement in Lance's curtain and he quickly forces a smile before turning on his heels and marching into his house and straight up to his room.

Australia is a nightmare. It's cold and he hates it because it's meant to be summer and warm and he wants to spend it in Lance's yard, running through the sprinklers. He wants to spend the summer nights in that fort he and Lance always make during sleep overs, talking about aliens and video games and comic book heroes.

He doesn't want to spend it with an Aunt he's never met before or visiting an old woman who doesn't even remember her own kids. But when he gets home and his friends ask how Australia was he lies and tells them it was hot.

* * *

That Thanksgiving is one he'll never forget. Maria pees her pants, his dad sleeps in the McClain's living room and at six in the morning they go to a hospital. He waits in the lobby while Lance and Milo are taken inside and minutes later his mom comes out.

“It's a beautiful baby boy.” his mom smiles and Keith's eyes land on the double doors again. He can't help but wonder if Lance is going to like his new brother.

“We should have another.” and that catches his attention, mild panic settling in his stomach. Another kid? Another brother? _No_.

“What do you boys think?” it's his mom asking.

“If you guys are ready to handle three kids I think it'd be a great idea, I've always wanted a sister.” Shiro laughs, Keith pouting, he didn't want a sister running around.

“Keith?”

“Am I allowed to say no?” His parents and Shiro all laugh and Keith isn't sure if that's a yes or no.

His parents never do have another kid though.

* * *

For Christmas Keith and Shiro go to North Carolina with Lance's family and he's the first to get out of the car when they get there. He's also the first to be greeted by a pack of barking dogs and he's only vaguely aware of the warm sensation running down his legs as he screams.

He cries in the shower and he cries on the bed while wrapped in a towel.

“Keith?”

“Go a-away.” Keith cries but the door creaks open and in walks Lance's mom.

“Here's your suitcase sweetheart, lets find you a new set of clothes and get you changed before you catch a cold, yeah?” Keith can only nod at that, pout permanently plastered to his face now. “Do you want the 'ho ho ho' shirt or the 'this is my money face' shirt?” she asks with that same goofy grin Lance always used. The sparkle in her eyes causes Keith's face to lighten up and he silently points to the Christmas shirt. “Good choice, here's a pair of jeans and boxers, I'll wait outside that door and when you change we're going to sit down and talk, alright?”

He nods and when she leaves he quickly changes, hanging the towel on the back of the bathroom door and opening the bedroom door to let Maria back in.

“I want you to be completely honest with me, are you okay?”

“Just scared.” Keith mumbles eyes falling to look at Maria's shoes.

“It's perfectly alright to be scared, I remember the first time I saw all of Edgar's dogs coming at me I nearly passed out.” she says it with a laugh and Keith feels obligated to smile. “They're all sweet dogs though, they're only there to scare away the monsters and trespassers.”

“Everybody laughed because I peed myself.”

“Remember a few weeks ago when I peed myself at dinner? Everybody got over it, Keith it happens. You know, back in April Milo scared Lance so bad that he peed himself too.” the story itself is enough to get Keith giggling and before he realizes it he's got his arms wrapped around the woman.

“Thank you.”

“You're welcome, now, let's head downstairs for some cookies and hot chocolate.”

* * *

Middle school and high school are a roller coaster for Keith. He's in seventh grade when he's positive he'd do anything for Lance and his attention. That thought is tested though in the eighth grade when Lance wants him to beat up a sixth grader who turns out to be a girl and one of his best friends.

He's in ninth grade when he tells his parents he's gay and they accept him with loving arms.

He's in tenth grade when his parents have him pack enough clothes for a month and they suddenly leave for Orlando. Shiro had an accident. The minute they get to the airport they grab their luggage, a rental car and then they're at the ER. He remembers seeing Shiro covered in bandages, bruises, cuts and... his arm missing.

He remembers crying so hard he passed out and woke up an hour later with a juice box and cookies being offered to him.

“Is he going to be okay?”

“As of right now, yes. His accident happened three weeks ago, he woke up the day we called you. He remembered enough to give us your contact information to get you here.” the nurse is tall, her hair is white and Keith is positive it's dyed. Her eyes seem to sparkle though and he can't help but wonder if she's wearing shiny contacts or something.

“His... arm.”

“Crushed. I was the surgeons assistant, his arm was missing... a lot of tissue and muscle. Most of his nerves were dead, we salvaged as much of his arm as we could.” she sounds upset and Keith wonders if she knew Shiro. The way she talks about him he would think so.

“Keith?”

Everybody turns to look at Shiro as he shuffles around and Keith is the first at his side. “Hey, I'm here.”

“I... I have to learn to use my left arm for writing now.” Keith could kill him.

“I see he's still got his sense of humor.” their mom chuckles quietly, tears pooling at the corners of her eyes. “We're glad you're okay.”

Keith spends the next month getting his homework via fax and his lessons through skype calls. He watches his parents fret over Shiro day and night and he watches his brother and the surgeon assistant, Allura, fall in love. Shiro is released three days before their return flight and as it turns out he also asks Allura out that day.

“You guys are perfect together.” Keith tells him as they sit in the living room, Shiro sprawled across the longer couch.

“Who?”

“You and Allura.”

“Really?”

“Mhm,” Keith confirms, clicking through more channels. “I want to be your best man.”

“That title is kind of promised to Matt.” Shiro chuckles and Keith feigns betrayal. “You know his little sister actually, Katie—er—Pidge. She goes by Pidge.”

“Small world.”

“Very.”

* * *

They’re in eleventh grade when Lance forces him and Pidge into a betting pool on when Hunk and Shay would start dating. Lance wins and seems to celebrate their dating more than Shay and Hunk do.

They’re sixteen when Lance tells them he does like people, he does like girls _and_ guys romantically and Keith feels his heart pick up with hope. There was hope that maybe, just maybe, Lance could have feelings for him. But when Lance starts talking to them less and less he confronts him.

And he’s asked on a date.

Or so he thought. It was a misunderstanding and Keith feels like a fool standing in the dining room, all eyes on him and his fancy get up, Nyma staring daggers at him. He excuses himself and the minute he’s in his room he kicks the wall. He fills Hunk, Pidge and Shay in on his little white lie and they end up going to Wild Wings to make it up to Keith.

“I think you had a good reason to think Lance was asking you out. His word choice was awful.” Shay says comfortingly and all Keith can do his mumble a half hearted thanks.

“So Lance has a girlfriend?” Keith is sure Pidge doesn’t mean to sound so surprised but he still laughs at her tone.

“Yeah.”

“What was she like?”

“I’m pretty sure if looks could kill she would’ve been arrested for murdering me already.” Keith shrugs, grabbing a celery stick and biting into it. “When she shook my hand her nails kind of dug into my skin, look she nearly cut my hand off. I’d be matching with my brother.” Keith sighs, three sets of eyes suddenly landing on him.

“Wait what?”

“Oh, I forgot to mention that. Pidge you probably know because of Matt… but my brother had an accident, his right arm is gone. He’s actually dating the girl who assisted in his surgery, funny huh?”

“You have… a slightly twisted sense of humor, Keith. No offense!” Shay quickly sputters, Keith waving her off with a shrug.

“None taken.”

* * *

The minute Lance blows them off for Halloween Pidge suggests they follow him and Nyma to make sure they don’t get into any trouble. It was a mistake. Not only does the damn car alarm beside them give them away but Keith gets in a fist fight with Lance after Hunk finds Nyma with another guy upstairs.

The car ride home is a messy one

“I shouldn’t have fought back, I’m stupid.”

“Dude he made you bleed.” Pidge is dead serious, she sounds ready to murder Lance. “He’s an idiot for trusting that skank over his childhood best friends. He’s known Hunk since the womb and he still didn’t believe it.”

“You make it sound like we’re twins.” Hunk whispers, meeting Pidges gaze through the rear view mirror.

“Basically are.”

“He’s an idiot and I hate him “ Keith growls.

“You’re just love struck.”

“Pidge you’re like twelve, shut up.”

Keith is mad for a total of three days before he misses Lance. Thanksgiving is rough for him. He watches the McClains leave from his bedroom window and when his parents ask why he didn’t join them he spins a lie about wanting to spend it with Hunk instead. So he does and he gets to learn more about his moms, Eva and Alondra.

He learns about how they met in Hawaii, how Eva had stolen from her parents to run away after they gave her a one or the other choice and she had picked love over her family. Eva said she never once regretted it, all while smiling at her three children.

Hunk has two siblings. A brother and a sister. Christian is four years younger than Hunk and he’s nothing like Hunk. He’s short and thin but he has that same dark brown skin and dark hair. His nose is more upturned than Hunks but you can still see the resemblance.

His sister is named Veronica and she’s six years younger than him. She’s got the same button nose and bright round eyes as Hunk. She’s short and round faced and her hair is a mess of curls.

Keith loves Hunk’s family just as much as he loves Lance’s and his own.

Christmas and New Years are spent at home with his parents and turkey and left over turkey. He misses the warm tamales, empanadas, mashed potatoes, lasagna, cakes, flan and everything else Lance’s family makes for the holidays. It almost feels like he’s being punished when he’s forced to eat turkey three days in a row.

But it’s nothing compared to the feeling he gets when Lance is at his door with a bag full of gifts. Part of him is happy to see Lance and see that his relatives care enough to send him presents even when he isn’t there or actually related to any of them. And then the other part of him wants Lance to suffer.

The latter part of him wins when he refuses Lance’s apology until Hunk and Pidge accept it. Keith gives both of them a heads up after Lance leaves and both agree to mess with Lance just a little on Keith’s behalf. When Lance is back at his door hours later Keith makes a mental note to call them out on not stalling him for longer.

Then he makes another mental note to thank them for it when he spends several hours alone with Lance that day.

* * *

Shiro gets married a few months after that. It’s nothing big, actually it’s not much of a wedding. Shiro and Allura go and fill out the paperwork and that’s that. They say it’s because of work but part of Keith thinks Shiro is afraid for everybody to see him with just one arm, with the scars marking his body.

But he can’t speak for his brother and he sends them a toaster as a wedding gift. Allura appreciates it and Shiro chuckles at the cliché kitchen ware gift.

* * *

Keith is happy to be talking to Lance again, the rest of senior year goes by too fast and then Thanksgiving is around the corner again and it’s held at Lance’s house. Tia Karen is the last relative he greets, only because their conversations always go on too long.

“How are things going?”

“Better I guess. Lance is still dating that girl Nyma but at least we’re talking.” Keith shrugs, Karen humming before pulling her phone out to scroll through her gallery.

“Look,” Keith glances to her screen and it’s a recent picture of her and that same woman he saw all those years ago. “We got back together, we ran into each other the other day and the sparks were still there. I thought that after not seeing her for years on end I would get over her. And I did, until I saw her again and all my emotions came flooding back at once.”

“I’m… happy for you, you’re happy now?” Keith asks, completely missing the point of her story.

“Yes, hun, I’m happy now but my point is; don’t lose hope. Look at me, old and in my forties but still finding the love of my life. Boys like Lance? They’ll only cause you trouble. Boys like Lance, no matter how much they love you and you love them will only cause you trouble. But please, don’t hold it against Lance, he means well in his own way.”

“Are you still telling me to be careful around him?” Keith’s voice sounds small even to him. Small and frightened, he feels nine years old again.

“Only because I love you, please be careful.”

And when Lance asks him about his conversations with Tia Karen, Keith brushes him off. He’ll tell Lance one day what they talked about, maybe. But until then, their conversations would be his secret to keep along with his feelings for Lance.

* * *

Lance doesn’t learn about Shiro’s accident or marriage until that Christmas. Keith is sure Lance is going to strangle him for keeping such big secrets but he’s surprised when Lance suddenly remembers that time in tenth grade that Keith and his parents left for a month.

Christmas is usually Keith’s favorite holiday with the McClains but that year is ruined when Nyma all but shouts at Maria and Keith is the one to kick her out.

“I had to, I didn’t like how she talked to you.” His voice cracks and soon Hector and Maria are pulling him into a hug.

“We’re so thankful to have you around.” Maria whispers and Keith begins to cry. Maybe it happened sooner but that was the moment Keith officially started to consider Maria and Hector his parents. Not in place of his adoptive parents, but alongside them. He loved both families equally but Maria and Hector had become so much more than just his best friends parents. They were his too and he’d be damned if he ever lost them.

* * *

It’s still storming out when Keith and Lance decide to leave Baskin Robins, Lance seemingly over his previous crying fest. “Are you sure you want to drive home? I can take you and bring you back for your bike when it stops raining.”

“No, it’s fine, I have somewhere to go.” Keith waves his offer off and then he’s heading out into the rain. He and lance drive off in different directions and Keith ends up at Pidge’s house.

“I’m so screwed.”

“If you’re referring to the hypothermia you’re going to get, then I agree.” Pidge says, looking Keith up and down. “Come on, I’ll get you a change of clothes while you tell me the latest on your Lance crush.”

It takes a total of ten minutes for Pidge to find clothes that would fit Keith. Then they’re talking through the bathroom door while Keith dries off and changes.

“He said he was glad to have me as a friend. Then he mentioned you and Hunk and said he loved us. I almost said ‘I love you too’ but I went with ‘love ya, bud!’ basically.” Keith cries through the door as he finishes patting his hair as dry as he can.

“You guys are real idiots, you know that?”

“You’ve mentioned it once or eight times.” Keith confirms, coming out of the bathroom, wet clothes in hand.

“So what are you going to do? Confess your true feelings to him or..?”

“Nothing.”

“God I hate you.”

* * *

The trip to Orlando for Shiro’s _real_ wedding is meant to be fun. It’s meant to be a weekend about his brother and his wife but it ends up being a train wreck. It ends up breaking his heart worse than ever before and it ends up with him losing his virginity to a damn asshole.

Lance.

It’s all laughs and dances until Lance has five too many drinks and Keith ends up getting his first blow job in a public garden from Lance. He’s on an all time high after that when Lance holds his hand and they leave the wedding way too early together. He nearly chokes when they buy sex toys and he knows he’s absolutely lost it when Lance spanks him and his first thought is _do it again_.

He doesn’t mind it when his hands are cuffed above him and Lance has complete control of their sexual encounter. Okay, maybe he’s a _bit_ afraid that Lance will pass out from all the alcohol and a housekeeper will find them in an awkward situation. Lance passed out and Keith cuffed to a bed naked. But that doesn’t happen, no, he loses his virginity that night in bliss. Lance’s hands touch him all over, they make him feel warm and content and even if Lance is drunk off his ass, Keith loves the attention. Every second of it.

When it’s over and his back is pressed against Lance’s chest Keith falls asleep faster than he ever has before but he wakes up to an empty bed and a broken heart when Lance doesn’t remember anything.

Things only get worse when Maria catches them outside of their hotel room and Lance uses the excuse they decided on after sex. Which meant Lance _probably_ remembered last night but for whatever reason was pretending not to.

“We fell asleep in the parking lot.” Keith adds in and the second Milo opens the door, Keith rushes in and slams the door, the loud bang causing Milo to jump.

“Keith, what the fuck?”

“Don't let Lance in.” Keith snaps, clicking the upper lock on the door. “He's a major asshole.”

“Am I allowed to ask why?”

“No.”

“Alright, I'm going back to bed.” Milo yawns, shuffling back to his bed and dropping into the sheets. Keith presses an ear to the door and listens to Lance and Maria talk. He only feels slightly guilty at eves dropping and it makes him feel worse when Maria's voice cracks as she asks why Lance did it.

_Tell him the truth._

_I can't._

Two words is all it takes for Keith to choke on a cry and press his back against the door and slide down it into a heap. He's positive his face is scrunched up in an ugly expression but he doesn't care as he tries his best to silence his cries. Breathing becomes difficult when his nose makes a god awful bubbling sound when he inhales and exhales.

“Keith?” it's Milo and Keith just shakes his head. “Dude, are you okay?” another shake of his head and then Keith is covering his face with his hands, a loud cry escaping. “Dude!” Milo cries out, jumping off of his bed, Beto jolting awake at the sudden jostle. “What's wrong with you?” Milo is at his side moments later and shaking him lightly.

“Don't, st-top.” Keith chokes out, brushing off Milo's arms. “Don't.”

“What happened? You're crying like you got stabbed.” Milo asks, Beto watching in silence from the bed.

“I'm fine.” Keith breathes out, rubbing the heel of his palms roughly against his eyes. “I'm fine.” he repeats, clutching the door handle for support to get up on shaky feet. “Don't worry about it.”

“Are we still not letting Lance in?” Milo asks, getting up to stand at eye level with Keith.

“Yeah.”

“Is it safe to assume your crying is linked to us not letting Lance in?” Milo questions, arms crossing over his chest.

“Yeah.” Keith nods, shuffling across the room, shooting Beto a weak smile. “I'm gonna... uh lay down for a bit.”

“Keith?” Beto calls out, kicking the blankets off and sliding out of bed. He's standing beside Keith moments later and... “Whatever Lance did, he's stupid.”

Keith isn't sure what he'd been expecting but it definitely wasn't that. “I—thanks.”

“No, I'm serious, Lance is so stupid. I think you've been trying to be subtle but we... kind of all know you like him, like a lot. I mean, it's not obvious but I've known you practically my whole life, I know you.” Beto explains, chewing on his bottom lip, eyes flickering between the window and Keith's face. “I've watched Lance hurt you more times than I can count and... I hate it, okay? I care about you a lot and the way Lance just seems to play you isn't fair to you.”

“Beto...”

“I'm serious, Keith. I know it's been like your whole life that you've wanted him but let it go, yeah? After everything he's put you through he doesn't deserve a second look from you anymore.” Beto sounds so serious, so genuine and it makes Keith let out a sad laugh.

“Thank you, I just need some time to get over it. Thanks for this, it... thanks Beto.” Keith smiles, surprising both himself and Beto when he pulls the other into a hug. Beto lightly pats Keith's back with a dry laugh.

“No problem, now go back to bed.”

Beto and Milo don't go back to bed after that. Technically, neither does Keith, he lays in silence, blanket pulled up to his chin and eyes staring at the sky through the window. He hears the shower start two different times and he can hear Beto and Milo talking in hushed whispers. He doesn't say anything when the door to the hotel room clicks open and he definitely doesn't say anything when he feels the mattress dip down a bit. He's got his eyes shut tight and his breathing is as even as possible and he can feel eyes focused on the back of his head. The mattress creaks and jostles a bit more and then the weight is gone. He hears a drawer open then close and then the bathroom door is shutting and the shower is running.

Keith finally turns around to find Milo and Beto both gone. Sighing, he stares at the ceiling of the hotel room and counts the tiles until he hears the shower shut off and the door open. Turning his head, Keith watches Lance walk out of the bathroom, towel draped over his head, sweat pants hanging low on his hips and chest bare. He can faintly hear Lance humming and Keith bitterly wonders how he can be so calm and carefree.

The second the towel comes off his head, Keith's eyes meet Lance's and it feels like the world comes to a stop. Lance smiles a tiny bit and Keith only blinks in response before rolling over and facing away from him. There's an almost silent sigh and then the tv is clicked on and either Lance sits on the other bed or stands in the middle of the room because he doesn't touch the same bed as Keith again.

_Tell him the truth._

Maria's words play on repeat in Keith's head for months after that. He rarely talks to Lance, if at all and it feels like everything he's ever known was suddenly taken from him. And when Lance _finally_ does talk to him it doesn't seem to make things better. Lance's excuse? Is awful and it makes Keith's heart drop at his stupid excuse. To make matters worse Lance doesn't seem to pick up on Keith's bitter tone. The goddamn nerve of Lance McClain and his dick.

That’s the day Keith decides to stop hoping Lance would come to his senses and ask him out.

* * *

College graduation is a pleasant surprise for Keith. In addition to having his family and Allura cheering him on, he has the entirety of Lance’s relatives too. For the half a minute that Keith walks across the stage to get his diploma he feels so, so loved. Cheers fill his ears and he decides he wants to keep this family forever. Even if one day he and Lance no longer talk, they’ll have to get a restraining order against him before he stops going to the family get togethers.

And it’s no surprise when Tia Karen pulls him aside during the celebration. “The way you walk around him… Keith please tell me you didn’t.” he gives her a disappointed frown and she covers her mouth slowly. “Oh, Keith…”

And so he tells her everything. As embarrassing as it is, he tells her about that night, about Lance’s words at Baskin Robins and how he’s decided to give it up entirely.

“Boys like Lance only cause trouble, “

“You’re right.”

“No.”

“No?” Keith asks, taken aback by her snappy tone.

“No, that’s not the end of it. I was… wrong this whole time.” She whispers, Keith feeling as confused as he had when he was nine.

“But all my life you’ve said boys like Lance only cause trouble and now you’re telling me to not give him up?”

“I’ve realized that I was bitter. Lance… everything I saw in my nephew I saw in my girlfriend. Her sense of humor, that smile the could start wars, the caring tone behind the flirty actions. Everything and everything I saw in myself I saw in you. I thought I was protecting you, preventing a heartbreak for you but I feel as if I might’ve caused it instead. Yes, boys like Lance cause you trouble but it’s all left to you on how you handle it.”

“What do you mean?” it feels hopeless at this point. All his life Tia Karen tells him to tip toe around Lance and then…. And then she’s telling him to take Lance on.

“If a person like me can handle the person that my girlfriend is…. Then you can handle Lance with ease. Do _not_ give up that boy because of _my_ insecurities.”

Keith doesn’t listen. Not really at least. He tries not to stay hung up on Lance anymore after that, he promises to tell Lance what he and Karen talk about when he turns twenty-four.

* * *

And the days until that day go by far too fast for Keith with no change in his feelings. His heart still does a dance when he’s with Lance. His stomach still does flips when they hug or their hands brush together but it gets easier with how busy they both get. Keith with his mechanic shop, Lance with his sea life research job, Pidge with college and Hunk with his computer maintenance job.

Most days he can fool himself. Until Lance says he’s leaving for three years and Keith tells him everything on his birthday. Or—almost everything. So he makes a plan with Maria over the phone the night before Lance leaves.

“Keith, honey, how are you?”

“Hey, Maria. I’m great…kind of. How are you?”

“Oh, I’m fine, but what do you mean kind of? What happened this time? Do I need to yell at Lance again?” and he loves just how serious she sounds. So much like a mother to him.

“No, nothing like that. I was actually wondering if you knew what time his flight left tomorrow?”

“Yes, eight in the morning.”

“Would… you be willing to stall him in the morning? I can get there by seven but I want to tell him how I feel, I want to tell him everything.” And Keith is shocked to hear sniffling on the other end of the call instead of a yes or no. “Maria..?”

“Yes, Keith. Definitely. Yes.”

The smile on his face hurts but he can’t help it, he’s far too excited to sleep that night.

* * *

“ _Don’t expect me to fuckin—let go of me! Let go—Lance! Fuck you!”_

Maria stands with him outside of the airport for almost an hour as they both cry. She tells him it’s okay, it’s alright but she never once defends Lance’s actions. Not once during the next three years.

Again, Beto is there for him when he needs a shoulder to cry on.

“I thought you said you were letting it go?” they’re sitting in the living room, blanket tossed up over the both of them and bowl of popcorn between them.

“I was but then I felt the need to embarrass myself at the airport.” Keith shrugs, shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

“You actually got kicked out?”

“Yeah, just ask your mom. Two guards dragged me out.” Both of them laughing at that.

“Does this mean you’re finally letting it go though? Last straw?” Beto questions, fiddling with his end of the blanket.

“I suppose so. I have three years to fully get over it so… hopefully I do.”

“You sound disappointed.”

Keith shrugs, moving the bowl to the coffee table and stretching out, kicking his feet up across Beto’s lap. “Kind of am, if I hadn’t of said anything at the airport then I wouldn’t have to worry about what it’ll be like when Lance comes back.”

“That’s three years away, worry about it when the time comes. Until then just ignore him. Unfriend him even if you have to.”

“Yeah, I will.” Keith nods, phone already in hand.

_You ever wish you hadn’t done/said that one thing to somebody and  you  
kind of wish it was a dream but you know it happened and you just… yeah._

* * *

The first Christmas after Lance leaves Maria and Hector invite Keith to Chicago for the holidays. He accepts and it’s one of the best Christmases he’s had in a while. The city is beautiful with all the lights and snow. He takes Beto, Yaha and Chicharo ice skating with a few other cousins and they make snow angels and snow men.

Beto shows of his skating skills while Keith can barely keep himself up right. At some point Beto takes Keith’s hands and pulls him around on the ice, both of them laughing until Keith’s blade gets caught in a dip and sends them both tumbling to the ice. They’re both in a fit of laughter when they slide to the edge, coming to a stop against the snow surrounding the frozen lake.

“Sorry,” Beto laughs, helping Keith up into a sitting position.

“Are you guys okay?” Yaha questions, skating to a stop beside them, Chicharo right behind her.

“Keith is horrible on ice and tried to take me out.” Beto feigns a hurt look and Yaha snorts a laugh, Keith rolling his eyes.

“Take you out where? To dinner?” Chicharo questions, all three looking over at him.

“Wait what?”

“Beto ssid Keith was trying to take him out. Like to dinner?” Chicharo rephrases, Yaha bursting into more laughter while Beto goes wide eyed and Keith is just quiet.

“No, like he tried to knock me out. Take me out like an assassin.”

Chicharo doesn’t seem at all satisfied with that answer and frowns. “Well that’s dumb.”

Christmas Eve they sing songs in Spanish that Keith can only hum, even after years of hearing those songs but his favorite one is about the donkey. _Mi Burrito Sabanero._ Because most of the kids run around in circles, hooting and howling while all but screaming the lyrics. Keith claps along and the only part Keith can sing perfectly is the _tuqui, tuqui, tuqui_ part.

His first Christmas with Lance’s family and without Lance… is by far his favorite.

 _So I went to Chicago for the first time and?? It’s so pretty during Christmas! I would’ve come in November_  
for Thanksgiving but my job kept me back in Santa Monica. Shout out to _**Maria McClain** _ _for inviting me  
me and Tia _ _**Ramona Rodriguez** _ _for letting me stay at her house during the holidays. Love you guys! <3_

* * *

He takes Yaha and Chicharo out to the go cart race tracks for Yaha’s birthday in August after that. It’s her second birthday without Lance and Keith makes it his goal to make it her best birthday yet.

“Wait, so, we get to go as fast as we want?” Chicharo asks with a grin as they strap into their carts.

“Only as fast as your cart lets you go, but yes.” Keith confirms, a hoot from Yaha catching both of their attention.

“You boys get ready to go down then!” and with that comment the air is filled with competition. As silly as Keith thought it was, Chicharo had brought goggles but seeing him wear them now Keith accepts that he looks adorable.

And he kicks their asses.

Yaha blames it on her cart not wanting to pick up speed and his going faster because he was smaller but that doesn’t stop him from bragging about his win. They snap a couple of pictures, courtesy of Yaha’s cell phone and Keith has her send him his favorite one. They’re sitting at a picnic table, wings, potato skins and pink lemonades sitting on their table, stuffed animals held in each of their arms (courtesy of the attached arcade) and peace signs held up by all three.

He sets that one as his profile picture and adds a caption.

 _Today I took_ _**Yahira McClain** _ _and_ _**Chicharo McClain** _ _to the go cart race track and you guys  
will not believe how amazing these kids are at driving??? Chicharo had us both beat though._

* * *

Babysitting has never been Keith’s strong point. In fact, it was probably always one of his weak points. Kids with good enough pouts and puppy dog eyes always got the better of him. And kids who cried enough always got what they wanted when Keith had enough of their screaming. So it was no surprise that Mila’s three kids were the biggest challenge Keith had ever faced.

For some reason, unbeknownst to Keith, her kids had begged for him to babysit them. And after a very long skype call, several tears from the twins and a long staring contest with Tania, Keith was agreeing to drive out and babysit them the following night.

He does the three hour drive and gets there around two, Mila and Cam leaving around four for their date night. Everything is fine at first, the twins are a little quieter than usual but maybe it’s because of the new tablets they have. Tania convinces him to play princess tea party with her and despite Mila telling them to have something healthy for dinner, they order pizza. By eight all three kids have their pajamas on and they agree to watch one Disney movie then head to bed.

So Keith thinks nothing of it when Tania asks Keith to help her brush her teeth. Of course, the second the door slams behind him he automatically panics. Then the door won’t open and he’s shouting for Ramon and Clark to open the dang door.

“They’re not going to let us out.” Keith turns at the sound of Tania and he’s quickly tapping his foot and glaring at her. “They paid me in Halloween candy to get you in the bathroom to lock us in here.” She admits, picking her towel up off the floor to reveal a rather impressive pile of candies.

“Why though? What are they doing?”

She shrugs, sinking to the floor and starting to work on her candy stash. “Dunno. They also took your phone by the way.” She adds, Keith automatically patting down his pockets. _Damn thieves._

Keith takes half the pile of candy as punishment and they play patty cake several times. He hears a few crashes from downstairs and he’s positive they’re destroying the whole house. “If they set this place on fire and we both die I’m blaming you.”

“They’re not _that_ stupid.”

Keith snorts at the comment, the twins were _exactly_ like Lance when he was twelve, they were definitely that stupid. At some point they pile up all the towels on the floor and fall asleep. Only to wake up to an angry Mila and a frightened Cameron.

“Keith! What the actual hell?!”

“Your twins are spawns of satan himself, no offense Cameron .” Keith groans, sitting up against the tub.

“After what they did downstairs? I wouldn’t be surprised.” Cameron admits and suddenly all signs of sleepiness are gone from Keith’s eyes.

“Wait what did they do?”

“Why don’t you go look! You’re buying new furniture.”

“Oh my god.” It’s all Keith can whisper when he sees the couch split in half, the dining table legs broken off and the table top broken into four pieces. There’s food all over the counters and kitchen floor. Ramon is sprawled on the living room floor and Clark is in the kitchen floor beside the fridge.

“Yeah.”

“How did they…”

“We don’t know.”

“I can’t even be blamed for this, they locked me in the bathroom with help from your nine year old after they paid her in Halloween candy. They’ve been plotting this since November, I’ve been framed.” Keith spits out every excuse he can think of but when his face is pressed against the dirty counter top and his arm held behind his back he agrees to buy them all new furniture and get their rug steam cleaned.

 _ **Emilia Miller**_ _and_ _ **Cameron Miller**_ _asked me to babysit their three kids yesterday, Ramon, Clark (12, twins) and Tania (9)_  
while they went out. Well, it was a three hour drive to their house, I got there around two in the afternoon . Mila and Cam  
left at like four and I’m thinking this is going to be an easy night. Well, after dinner, around eight or so I’m helping Tania  
brush her teeth when the bathroom door shuts and I can hear the twins giggling. They put a chair on the other side of the  
door and did you guys know that ACTUALLY works? I don’t have my phone so Tania and I sit on the bathroom floor playing  
patty cake for like four hours until we pile up the towels and just fall asleep. Mila and Cam get home at like one in the morning  
Mila asks me to come downstairs, I’ve never seen a bigger disaster in my entire life. I now owe Mila and Cam a new couch and  
dining table, we still don’t know how the twins destroyed both…

* * *

Soon after that Beto starts hanging around with Keith more. Eventually Beto starts asking about cars and engines and how they work and he’s a quick learner.

“Hey Beto do you like your job?”

“My office job? No. Who wants to work in the mail room? It sucks.” Beto scuffs, looking through Keith’s fridge for a snack.

“Do you wanna work at my shop then? We’ve been meaning to hire more people and you’re a quick learner.”

Beto pauses his search for food and stands up straight, eyes narrowed at Keith in doubt. “What’s the catch?”

“No catch. I like having you around and you’d probably earn more working at my shop than the mail room. Which means you could get out of that place you call an apartment.” Keith laughs, Beto pouting at the jab.

“I like my place.”

“I’ve been to your apartment a total of three times and never again. The building is practically crying to be torn down.”

“It’s what I can afford!” Beto laughs, slamming the fridge door shut and leaning against it. “What’s my pay of rate if I say yes?”

“Most employees start at fifteen dollars an hour but I’ll play favorites and start you at fifteen fifty.”

Beto seems to mull it over for a few minutes before shrugging. “When do I start?”

A few weeks after that Beto is working in the shop, shadowing behind another employee and learning pretty quickly. Most days he clocks in at nine am, two hours after the shop opens and every day he brings Keith a cup of coffee.

Keith tells him that’s not necessary but Beto insists, after all, he can now afford a better place with the new income.

 _**Alberto (Beto) McClain** _ _started working at the shop and the amount of times he’s brought me  
coffee in the mornings is pretty great. He’s my new favorite McClain (sorry _ _**Chicharo McCalin** _ _)_

* * *

“Hey Keith?”

“Yeah?” said person replies, not glancing away from his phone screen.

“Why don’t you ever talk to Lance when we skype him at family get togethers?” Chicharo questions, plopping down on the couch beside Keith.

Clicking his phone off, Keith sets it down and lets out a long puff of air. “We’re not on speaking terms right now.”

“I’m not twelve anymore, you can tell me if he did something awful.”

“He broke my heart.”

“Are you okay now?”

Keith is silent, finger tips tapping against his phone screen. Was he okay? He’d never truly be over Lance McClain but he’d be okay with time. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay now.”

_It’s amazing how fast time goes by and how much time can heal all wounds._

* * *

“Mom.”

“Keith!”

“Mom, please, this is so lame.” Keith snorts opening the box to peek inside at the snow cone machine. “It’s not even summer.”

“Does it really need to be summer for you to enjoy an ice cone?” Chanci questions, shoving Keith aside and quickly unpacking the machine and it’s other content.

“I mean, I _guess_ not but it’d be preferable.” Keith shrugs, watching as his mom plugged the machine in and immediately headed to the fridge for some ice cubes. “Are you making some right now?”

“Of course! I didn’t fight some soccer mom for this just to let it sit unused until May!”

“Mom!” Keith laughs, moving aside when his mom starts dumping the ice into the machine. They watch in fascination as the ice is crushed and it pools in the large container. “It looks like snow.”

“That’s the point! Hand me two cones, we’re about to have some grape cones.”

Minutes later they’re both sitting in the living room, purple ice cones in hand. “I change my mind, this was the best thing you could’ve bought on black Friday.”

 _Public service announcement: my mom_ _**Chanci Shirogane** _ _is the best, she just  
got me a snow cone machine and?? I can now make a snow cones at home now._

* * *

“Just like, give me a key, yeah?” Beto questions, bouncing on his heels as he watched Keith crush more ice.

“Yeah! Give him a key Keith!” Chicharo quickly agrees, reaching out to tap the glass of the snow cone machine.

“You guys only like me for my ice.” Keith mutters teasingly, scooping the shaved ice into three different cones.

“Is that a yes? Because it wasn’t a no.” Beto laughs, grabbing his cone and practically drowning his ice in green apple flavoring.

“If I give you a key will you guys at least clean up whenever you come over?”

“Promise!”

 _**Alberto (Beto) McClain** _ _has practically moved into my house and he  
claims it’s bc we’re friend BUT I think its the snow cone machine _

* * *

“Hello?”

“Shiro?”

“Keith? Are you okay? Why do you sound--?”

“What the fuck? I hate you? You and Allure both?”

“Keith? What the fuck?”

They’re both silent, Keith wanting to glare at Shiro but the best he can do is angrily huff into the phone. “First you get married without telling me. Then you make a big scientific break through about prosthetics without telling me. That all I’m okay with. But!! Not telling me Allura is pregnant until like seven months?! What the hell? I bet Pidge and Matt knew, didn’t they!”

“I mean, they live here and we work with them so it was kind of impossible to hide it from them.”

“I’m your brother!” Keith isn’t actually angry, he’s more… surprised, upset, confused, _absolutely betrayed_.

“Yeah but we wanted to surprise you.” Keith can practically hear the smile in Shiro’s voice and any trace of anger suddenly leaves him.

“Why?”

“We’re… naming her Katarina Kogane Shirogane.”

“Kogane… like my… why?”

“We wanted to name her after you but Keith isn’t really a girls name and then Allura suggested your birth surname. Kogane is pretty and it comes from you.” Shiro explains, Keith unable to find words. “If you don’t like it though we can change it.”

“Shut up, you better not change it.” Keith quickly cuts in, Shiro’s laughter filling his ears. “I love it—her—I love her already.”

“You’re a sap.”

“And you’re still getting a call out post.”

 _Call out post for_ _ **Takashi Shirogane**_ _and_ _ **Allura Shirogane**_ _for not fucking telling me_  
they were expecting a baby???? ?? You can't just mail me a baby shower invite when you're  
already seven months pregnant, I'm disowning you guys

* * *

When he tells Hunk and Pidge about the new house he bought he fully expects them to spend time there when they come to town. Pidge moves to Orlando with her brother Matt and starts to work for Shiro’s company but she’s back in Santa Monica pretty often. Hunk lives a few hours away up in Mountain View but he’s in town most weekends.

What Keith doesn’t expect however is for them to break into his house on a Wednesday. And he definitely doesn’t expect to come home late and walk into his room ready to sleep only to pause at a growling noise. What the—and Keith’s life flashes before his eyes. It’s mostly him pining after Lance McClain and stealing his family but he’s clutching his chest and pressed against the wall, throat suddenly sore from the scream he let out. Pidge is sprawled on his floor, half out from under the bed and a messy black wig covering her face in a terrifying Grudge kind of way.

“Pidge?! What—I? What?” he can’t seem to form words and his legs are still trembling but he stumbles to the bed, pulling his phone free of his pocket and trying not to kick Pidge in the face.

 _ **Pidge (Katie) Holt**_ _is a real life troll, I’ve never screamed louder in my life. She just_  
fucking crawled from under my bed how long were you down there??? Pidge  
what the actual??? I wasn’t home all day either??? How’d you even get in???

Pidge is still cackling on his floor and Keith is glaring at her, wondering if he could maybe end her with a thought. He’s far too distracted to notice his closet door creak open and Hunk to pop his head out.

“That would be me.”

There it is. The scream that ends Keith’s vocal chords and sends Pidge into another fit of laughter. “Sorry, I was just… answering your question on facebook about how she got in.”

 _Update:_ _ **Tsuyoshi (Hunk) Garrett**_ _helped her break into my house, they ate everything in_  
my fridge, used all my toilet paper, Hunk hid in my closet and Pidge under my bed and  
they waited until I got home to make me piss my pants. I almost kicked Pidge in the face.

* * *

Keith’s grandma dies that July before Lance comes home. His mom cries for hours after the phone call and as reluctant as Keith is to go to Australia for the funeral… he goes for his mom. The place is big, huge, there was no chance of him running into Lance. None.

Not even with Mila breathing down his neck about looking for Lance does he do it. He refuses. So it only seemed fitting that the universe force him to see Lance on a date at the pier. And he remembers how Tia Karen had said that she got over her ex after years of not seeing her but the moment she saw her again all of her feelings came flooding back.

And he knew exactly how she felt now.

Keith makes a run for it the second Lance stands up and looks in his direction. He runs back to his aunts house and he hides there until it’s time to go back to the airport and go home and he lies to Mila and everybody else when he gets home.

“Yes, I saw him.”

“And everything is okay now?”

“Peachy. Now, can you please?”

“Right, right. I’m just… I’m glad.” Mila smiles but her voice doesn’t convince him. Keith knows she suspects him of lying and he’s glad she doesn’t push it.

* * *

Keith still finds it strange when he comes home to find Beto in his living room. Sometimes Chicharo is there doing homework but usually it’s just Beto. He also finds it strange just how much Beto had grown to look like Lance.

He finds himself calling Beto his best friend sometimes, especially with how much time they spend together. If the McClains and other relatives hadn’t known better they would’ve assumed the two were even dating.

“Would it be weird of me to say you guys are cute?” the cashier questions, ringing up the groceries they were buying for Maria.

“Wouldn’t blame ya’ we’re cute to boot.” Beto smirks, winking at the girl who giggles.

“No, I meant as a couple.”

“What?” Keith immediately questions, nearly dropping his card in surprise.

“Sorry, that was weird, wasn’t it?”

“I’m confused, you weren’t hitting on us?” Beto questions earning an elbow to the ribs from Keith. “Serious question.”

“No, I’m sorry, that was so weird. I thought you guys we’re –sorry.” She apologizes, cheeks flushed almost as red as Keith’s.

Once they pay and have everything in the car, Keith starts the car but doesn’t start pulling out. “Do we look like a couple?”

“I guess?” Beto shrugs, pulling at his seat belt.

“But you’re like the walking textbook definition of straight.” Keith points out, their eyes meeting before they both burst into laughter.

“Even if I _was_ into guys, no offense Keith but you aren’t my type.” Beto says with a laugh. “Nice to know we make a cute couple though. If both of us are still single when I’m thirty can we just get friend married?”

“What even is that?”

“It’s when two friends get married for the benefits and the rights to say they’re married.”

Keith narrows his eyes at Beto with a terrible fake frown and shakes his head. “You’re dumb.”

“And you’re letting the ice cream melt! But hey, smile.”

“Huh?” the snapping sound from Beto’s camera fills the air and then Keith is blinking several times. “Did you just take a picture of us?”

“Yeah, I’m posting it on your facebook. I’m calling you gay and saying I love you, maybe our moms will see and be confused.”

“You’re a weird kid.” Keith laughs, finally starting the drive home.

“You say it like you’re twenty years older than me, I’m only two years younger.”

 _**Alberto (Beto) McClain** _ _was here and he loves you Keith Kogayne_

* * *

His calendar reminds him of the day Lance gets home. March first. And two weeks after that his phone is ringing with a number he memorized a long time ago… and he plays Lance for a fool and pretends to not know who it is. They agree to meet and he hates that Lance picked Baskin Robins.

He hates that Lance still looks perfect and young after all these years and being so close to thirty. He hates that they both still get rocky road ice cream but he especially hates that Lance doesn’t sit beside him in the booth like they used to.

“How was Australia?” the question is boring and stupid but it’s too late to take back.

“Fun I guess. I mostly worked while out there, that fish we were doing heavy research on gives birth like a mammal, fucking crazy, right?”

“Is that possible?”

There it is, that stupid grin that makes Keith’s palms feel sweaty. “Science.”

“Huh.”

They sit in silence for a minute when Lance calls out his name and at the same time Keith’s phone rings. It’s the shops ID and most likely Beto. He’s watching the shop while Keith went on his extended break. He’s complaining about one of the workers and about one of the customers and Keith knows he has to go soon. “Yes, I’ll be right over, love you, see you in about half an hour.” Keith thinks nothing of the goodbye until he notices the sour look on Lance’s face.

“Who was that?”

Keith thinks over what he had said. _Love you._ And he hates the idea he gets, he knows he’ll regret it but he wants to give Lance a taste of what the past eighteen years have been like for him. “What? Oh… it was Beto.” and there it is. The expression Keith had been fishing for. Heartbreak.

“Why’d you say love you? Did you just start casually saying that to all my siblings?” Lance sounds hurt, sounds accusing and something inside Keith feels almost satisfied. _Almost_.

“Occasionally I’ll tell the others I love them, like Maria and Hector. But Beto I tell daily.” Which wasn’t a lie. He had gotten into the habit of saying love you to most of them. Maria, Beto, Chicharo and Hector especially since he saw them the most now.

“Why?”

“We’re dating.” Keith deadpans, absolutely no going back now. He half expects Lance to point out that Beto is straight but to his surprise that doesn’t happen. It truly amazed Keith how little Lance knew about his own siblings.

“You… you’re dating _my brother_?” Lance sounds hostile, almost threatening but Keith doesn’t back down.

“Yeah? It's not like I was dating anybody or anything and he was there when I needed somebody. He always was even before you moved.” Keith was going all out, almost positive his tone sounded murderous. He didn’t want to hate Lance, he really didn’t but seeing him after three years only reminded him of the ache he’d felt almost his entire life. He wanted Lance to feel it too, if only for a fraction of the time Keith had felt it.

“When did you guys… start dating?”

“Last April, after my birthday. Things were said, things happened and he already had a key to my house so things just kind of fell into place.” Keith explains, twirling his cone in hand.

“If I hadn’t of just left that day at the airport would things be different? Did you… did Beto always like you?” and now Keith is confused. Why did Lance care if things could’ve been different? It wasn’t like he’d ever had feelings back for Keith.

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Keith shakes his head. He had to play this off casually. “No, Beto didn’t always like me like that. We just spent a lot of time together after I hired him and things just happened. What you did at the airport… it just made me realize how stupid I was and how I needed to absolutely let things go.”

“That was stupid of me too.”

“Which part?”

“Everything. When we were nine, when we were seventeen, nineteen... twenty-one at Shiro's wedding.... when we were twenty-four and I left.” There it is. The heart beat skipping. Was Lance actually apologizing? Was he being genuine? How did he still make Keith feel like he was walking on clouds, it hardly seemed fair. “All of it, I was stupid the past eighteen years.”

“I can't believe I've known you that long. That's the age of a legal adult.” So of course Keith forces himself to ignore the apology. Change the topic, _don’t_ let Lance get a grip on his heart again. “Anyway though, it doesn't matter anymore. I let it go, I moved on, I’m happy now and you never had feelings for me.”

“Right, right. I should get going I promised Chich I'd... do something, I forgot. I have to go though.” Lance’s excuse is something awful but when he moves to leave Keith notices the wad of paper in his grip. He reaches out without thinking and pulls the brunette to a stop.

“What's that in your hand?”

Glancing down, Lance seems to struggle for words before finally speaking. “Just an apology letter, but I said everything out loud the letter does. It's just trash now.” he shrugs Keith's hand off and throws both his ice cream and the letter away before leaving. Keith watches his car pull out before getting up and moving to the trash can. He fishes around before finding the wad of paper and flattening it back out. He stares for several minutes, contemplating what reading that note would cause.

On one hand he might fall back into his pity party and his feelings come back full force.

And on the other hand he might have some closure with Lance if it was just an apology letter.

Folding it up, Keith shoves it into his pocket, deciding he’d talk to Pidge about it the next time she was in town. But until then he needed to stay away from Lance, needed to keep himself from falling again. And so he sends the text without fully thinking about it.

_**It's best if we don't talk anymore outside of family get togethers.** _

It’s pathetic really, breaking Lance’s heart for once meant Keith would be breaking his own heart as well. He hated it, he truly did, the kind of affect Lance had on him and just how little he had on Lance. Maybe it was beyond pathetic, dedicating his damn life and feelings to a boy who would never feel the same way. Maybe it was even selfish, everything he’d done, everything he’d forced on Lance. But it didn’t matter, it seemed like no matter what happened Keith’s story would end with a heartbreak.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all man this chapter was crazy long. I hope this cleared up..... some things on what happened..... basically, no, Beto and Keith are **not** dating. They are close friends now though. Beto is straight though and Keith is being an asshole. I hope you're all conflicted now on how you feel about Keith in this fic. I'm not even sorry.
> 
> But okay! So next chapter is the last chapter.... you might be asking yourselves now... "How is she going to fix this?? How are we going to get a happy ending? Did she LIE to us?" well all I can say is stay tuned to find out next week! AKA This chapter was so hellishly long that y'all can wait until next Tuesday because the next chapter is prob gonna be just as long and I need to actually write it.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _Italics are memories_  
>  The lyrics throughout this last chapter are from [Happy Ending by MIKA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFkSMHle8-M)  
> I'd like to credit my friend for showing me that song and also having a major influence over the last few chapters. Basically co-wrote this lol. You can find him over on Verunme here on ao3 or at slightlycrazygamer on tumblr!

**This is the hardest story that I've ever told  
No hope, or love, or glory  
Happy endings gone forever more**

**o.O.o**

With Hunk living in Mountain View, Lance really has no place to stay except home. Especially considering the lab he worked at was in Santa Monica, so even if Hunk and Shay weren't sharing an apartment Lance wouldn't be able to move out there with him. So he's back in his room, suit cases laying by his bed and a few boxes of personal belongs resting on his bed.

“Lance, here I dug out some of the old bed sheets from the closet.” Maria says, walking into the room and giving Lance a soft smile before setting the sheets down on his bed. “It'll get better, I promise.”

Lance nods without a word, shuffling around the room to the dresser and pulling the drawers open one by one.

“I'll let you get to unpacking, alright?” again, Lance nods without a word and his mom heads out. He shoves the sheets over and starts with the boxes on his bed. The old bulletin board is still up so he pulls out a box with several pictures and pushpins and sets it on the desk under the board. Rummaging through it, he finds his favorite picture first, his family. It's one where Cameron and Vanessa are included too, everybody smiling and Lance remembers that day perfectly. He was twelve when the picture was taken, Mila and Cam had just come back from their honey moon and Milo was still so smitten with his then girlfriend, Vanessa.

* * *

“ _Lance get Cristiano will you?” Maria called out while tugging at Yaha's hair. “Beto! Don't make me go upstairs and get you, get down here!”_

_Snickering, Lance crawled behind the couch to find Cristiano sitting there with a teething toy in his mouth. His teeth had long since come in but he still liked to chew on the toys. “Hey bud, wanna come on out?”_

_Cristiano shook his head and shifted his position so his back was to Lance. Feigning offense, Lance crawled further in behind the couch and tapped his two year old brother's shoulder. “Cris come on, Mila and Cam are gonna be here soon! Ma's gonna freak if you stay back her.”_

_Cristiano paused his chewing for a second to look up at Lance with big round eyes and Lance was sure he had him but Cristiano shook his head and turned back to his teething toy._

“ _You know, for a two year old you're still a brat. I remember Yahira was worse than you but still.” Lance huffs, sitting back against his heels and running a hand through his hair. “I'll get you a knew coloring book, how's that?”_

_Again, Cristiano peeked over his shoulder and finally fully turned towards Lance, holding his hands out to him. Grinning, Lance did a small fist pump and proceeded to grab his brother and stand up. “Got him ma!”_

“ _They're here!” Beto shrieked, scrambling down the stairs, one shoe in hand, the other on his foot and his tie hanging loosely around his neck. “I just saw their car pull up! They're here, they're here, come on!” half way to the door, their dad managed to grab Beto's arm and pull him to a stop._

“ _Not so fast sport,” Hector laughed, turning Beto to face him. “Put your shoe on first and let me fix your tie.”_

“ _Yeah you look dumb like that.” Lance cackled, shuffling out from behind the couch, Cristiano resting his cheek against Lance's shoulder and teething toy still in his mouth._

“ _So what's your excuse then, Lance?” Yahira snapped with a grin, Maria tugging a little roughly at her braid in warning. “Ah! Ma!”_

“ _Watch what you say, you kids don't have the privilege of having parents that don't understand what you say in English like I did.” Maria warns, finishing off the braid and patting Yahira's shoulder._

_The front door unlocking and then opening sends everybody rushing to the door to greet Mila and Cameron. “We're home!” Mila squeals, immediately being pulled into a hug by Maria._

“ _Cameron you actually got a tan!” Lance gasps, moving to give Cameron a one armed hug, Cristiano pressed between them._

“ _You should see his back and shoulders, it's not a tan, it's a sunburn.” Mila giggles, moving to hug Hector next._

“ _Mila!” Cameron whines jokingly, hugging Yahira and Beto next._

“ _What'd you guys bring me?” Lance asks, jumping on his heels, Cristiano lifting his head in excitement at the question too._

“ _You'll have to wait and see. Where's Milo?” his older sister questions, glancing around everybody. “Don't tell me he's late?”_

“ _As usual,” Maria chuckles. “Vanessa messaged him over an hour ago that she was ready and that boy left twenty minutes ago. They should be here soon though.”_

_Cameron moves out of the doorway to hug Hector and Maria and that's when Lance catches a glimpse of Hunk and Keith sitting in Keith's front yard playing with what looked like cards. Stepping out onto the front porch Lance shouts at them, “Hey! Guys Mila and Cam are home! Come say hi!”_

_Both boys look up and seem to say a few things back and fourth between each other before waving at Lance and packing up their cards and heading over. Keith is the first to greet Lance and Cristiano._

“ _Hey,” Keith starts, glancing past Lance at everybody standing just past the doorway. “Is that Cameron? Did he get a tan?”_

“ _That's what I said!” Lance cackles._

“ _He looks... weird with a tan.” Hunk notes, squinting at the guy in question. “I kind of figured he'd get a sun burn instead of a tan.”_

“ _Mila says his back and shoulders are.” Lance explains, turning and heading back in, Keith and Hunk following behind him. Milo and Vanessa show up soon after that and Maria all but demands they get a family picture right then and there. Everybody piles into the living room, Milo setting up the tripod and Camera and turning it to face the couch where Maria and Hector were sitting. Cameron and Mila sitting to their left, Vanessa sitting to their right with enough space for Milo. Beto, Yahira sit on the floor in front of Mila and Maria and then Lance finds a place in front of Hector, Cristiano sitting in his lap._

“ _So just press this button?” Hunk asks for the millionth time and Milo nods._

“ _Yup, count to three then press the button.” Milo confirms yet again and then moves over to the couch._

“ _Alright, one, two, three.” Hunk counts off, a bright flash filling the room._

“ _One more.” Maria insists.”_

 _Again, Hunk counts off then the flash blinds Lance yet again. “Hey what about a silly face one!” Lance shouts in excitement, everybody quickly agreeing and Hunk starting to count again. When the flash fills the room everybody has a silly expression, Mila tugging at her cheeks and tongue peeking out. Cameron looks cross eyed and his lips are puckered. Maria has a shocked expression, eyes and mouth wide and hand pressed to her chest. Hector's winking at the camera, his tongue poking out at the corner of his lips. Lance has his hand looped up over his head and a finger tugging his nose up, grin on his face. Cristiano looks utterly confused and terrified by everybody. Yahira has her hands pressed to both her cheeks, smooshing her face together and eyes focusing on the tip of her nose. Beto has his head flung back, tongue sticking out and he looks like he's mid shout. Milo has an expression similar to that of the painting_ The Scream _hands slapped to his cheeks, eyes wide and mouth in a wide oval ship. Vanessa looks taken aback by the whole situation, leaning back, eyes shut and grin on her face. The camera catches her looking down however and she's given what looks like a double chin._

 _In short, the picture becomes one of Lance's favorites. His family looks silly but they look like_ them _and he loves it._

* * *

Pinning the picture up, Lance adds several more pictures to the bulletin board. School pictures of Hunk, Pidge and Keith from ninth grade. A picture with the four of them at the beach. Some of his entire family at reunions and holidays. There's a picture of Keith standing in the middle of the farmers market in Mexico from the one time Keith had tagged along for the holidays. There's a picture of his Tio Edgar's dog, Blue, the one Lance had named and loved. She had passed away a few years back now but Lance still loved her. Once all the pictures were up Lance noticed a folded up slip of paper at the bottom of the box. Pulling it out, Lance frowned at the hand writing. Nyma.

Unfolding it, a picture slipped out. It was him and Nyma grinning at the camera. Lance was holding the phone out, his other hand thrown over Nyma's shoulder and Nyma held a hand up in a peace sign. They looked happy. Genuinely happy and Lance felt a pang of jealousy towards past him.

**o.O.o**

**Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life  
Can't get no love without sacrifice**

**o.O.o**

* * *

 

_He's laying across Nyma's queen sized bed scrolling through facebook when Nyma walks out of the bathroom, robe wrapped tightly around her body and hair wrapped in a pale blue towel._

“ _So movies tonight?” Nyma questions moving to her desk to grab her lotion._

“ _Mhm.” Lance hums, clicking his phone off and setting it down. “Need help?” Lance grins, waggling his eyebrows at her. Nyma chuckles, moving to sit on the end of the bed and hand Lance the bottle of lotion._

“ _Make sure you actually get the lotion on my shoulders and back.” she says sternly but with a smile, Lance grabbing the bottle and crawling to sit behind her. Tugging the robe back and off her shoulders, Lance pours a small amount of lotion into the palm of his hands and starts at her shoulders._

“ _You know, I still can't believe somebody like you could love somebody like me.” Lance admits, hands moving down to her back, rubbing in circles._

“ _What do you mean?”_

“ _You're stunning Nyma, you could have anybody you want and yet you picked me.” Lance explains, hands gliding back up to her shoulders, thumbs rubbing small circles against her neck. “Even after... you know even after how my family treated you.”_

“ _Lance I told you not to worry about it, shit happens.” she sighs, reaching up to squeeze his hand. “It's not your fault Keith has them wrapped around his finger.”_

“ _I know but... but I should've said something on New Years. You were right, they treat him like my boyfriend and treated you like some outsider. I hate it but I should've said something.”_

“ _I don't care. I really don't.” Nyma promises, turning slightly to look at Lance. “As long as you treat me like your girlfriend I don't care how your family acts towards me.”_

_Lance smiles weakly at that and then leans forward, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Yeah but I care.”_

“ _Well you shouldn't. Don't let your family influence who you're with or how you view them—_ me _. Don't let them do that.” Nyma huffs, pulling her robe back up and slipping out of Lance's grip._

“ _I can't help it, my family is really close, I care what they think and I mean—well I mean I love you Nyma, I do but--”_

“ _Wait are you breaking up with me?” Nyma accuses, turning on her heels to shoot Lance a look of panic. “Lance?”_

“ _What? No! No, no I wasn't, no I'm not. I was just saying I care what my family thinks. I care what Keith thinks he's like my brother, he's been in my life for so long.” Lance stutter,s sliding off the bed and stepping towards Nyma but she steps back, holding her hands up and shaking her head._

“ _No, no Lance no. Look it's been a few months now and I've been dealing. I've been putting up with this and keeping my distance from your family and friends but it's exhausting. It really is.” Nyma confesses, arms wrappings around her waist. “I really care for you but this is taxing, your family is too big of a presence in your life and if they're going to hate me in favor of some kid who's obsessed with you... I can't deal with that.”_

“ _Wait... I'm confused, are_ you _breaking up with me now?”_

“ _Lance I'm so sorry.”_

“ _Don't.”_

“ _It's not you, it's... it's your family, it's Keith, Hunk, Pidge, it's my well being.” Nyma cries out, eyes filling with tears. “It's cliché to say it's me, but it is.”_

“ _I don't... no, please Nyma, come on. We can—we can work this out. I can talk to my family.” Lance begs, moving to stand in front of her, tears streaking down his own cheeks. “Nyma please?”_

“ _Lance! No! No, I'm exhausted. I'm tired! I'm_ hurt _!” she screams, stumbling back away from him, back hitting the wall. “I'm tired of avoiding your family! W-what do you think would happen if we ever got married, huh? You love them! You love your family and the reunions and them—and you can't have that with me. They hate me, they always will. I've tried, I tried at the get togethers but everybody pretty much stayed away from me in favor of_ him _.” She takes a deep breath at the end and shakes her head. “I can't.”_

“ _Nyma. No it's not—not like that. They're just not used to other people, I don't know. I don't know why they treat you this way. I care too much about you, please don't do this because of them.”_

“ _Get out.”_

“ _What?”_

“ _Get out of my house.” Nyma breathes in almost a whisper._

“ _You don't mean it, pleas--”_

“ _Get out!” she shrieks, startling Lance. “Get the fuck out! It's been months, almost two years of this bullshit Lance! I can only handle so much!” she's crying again and Lance's chest feels tight at knowing he's the reason she's like this. “Please... please just leave. Leave me alone, leave.” she cries, sliding down the wall to sit on her floor. “Go home Lance.”_

“ _Let me help you, Nyma...I—I can't just leave.”_

“ _What do you need me to say to get you to leave?!” she screams, hands slapping the floor. “Fuck you! Get out! Go! Leave, I hate you! I hate your stupid family! I hate that stupid ass kid Keith! I hate the way you laugh or the way you talk too much! Just go—go get out!” she's sobbing, hiccups cutting in between cries and Lance knows it's done. It's hopeless and it hurts._

“ _I'm so sorry.” Lance cries, stumbling out of her room, barely remembering to grab his shoes before he's rushing out into the rain and to his car._

_He sits in her driveway crying for a few minutes before calming down enough to remember how to properly use a cellphone. He fumbles with the buttons before his phone starts dialing, phone pressed to his cheek and head resting against his window._

“ _Hello?”_

“ _Keith? Can you meet me somewhere?”_

“ _It's pouring outside, is it even safe to drive?”_

_Lance's mouth feels dry, he swallows back a cry and manages a single word. “Please.”_

“ _...Where? Are you okay?”_

* * *

 

Holding the picture a little too tightly, Lance reaches back into the box for a pushpin and then pins the picture up to his board.

After that he sets up his desk lamp, books across his desk, he hangs posters of fish, dolphins, sharks, movie posters. He hangs a string of chalk squares with “L A N C E” written individually on each square above his window. He hangs a string of star lights around his room from one corner to the next and then he starts putting away his clothes.

It takes him two full hours to get everything done and when he heads downstairs for dinner Milo is sitting in the living room watching a game show.

“Hey.” Lance greets quietly, his older brother glancing up for a second, waving and then turning back to the tv. “You're dating Vanessa again?” Lance continues, his brother pausing the show and looking up to face him.

“Yeah.”

“You're living together now, right?”

“Yup.”

“Do you think it's for good this time?” Lance asks, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

“I hope.” Milo nods, both staring at each other silently.

“I'm glad.” Lance smiles weakly, eyes suddenly stinging. Blinking a few times, Lance let's out a small laugh. “I um. Man,” Lance laughs, shoulders shaking and a strangled cry leaving his throat. Milo's suddenly on his feet, panic written on across his face.

“Lance? Dude are you okay?”

“Fine.” Lance laughs, reaching up with both hands to cover his mouth, shoulders shaking still. “F-fine I—i--I just—I--” a sob escapes and then his face is buried against Milo's chest, arms wrapped around him.

“It's okay, _shh_ , come on, let's sit down. You're okay.” Milo whispers, leading a trembling Lance to the couch. “Hey, buddy, come on, you wanna talk about it?”

Lance shakes his head, hands still covering his face, fingers now extended to cover his eyes and cheeks too.

“I'm here if you need to talk, alright? I hate seeing you like this.”

Nodding slowly, Lance manages to get his crying under control. He didn't want to talk about it because he felt like he _couldn't_ talk about it. Keith was dating Beto who knew how much closer he'd gotten to Milo too? He'd babysat for Mila and Cam. He had taken Yahira and Chicharo go karting. His Tia Karen had sided with Keith their whole lives. And it only took eighteen years for Lance to realize his family wasn't his safe place.

“Where's mom?” Lance's voice cracks but he doesn't care.

“Kitchen, but hey Be--”

“Thanks.” Lance cuts him off, springing off the couch and heading into the dining room, turning the corner and freezing just outside the kitchen door.

“And you just let him?” it was his mom and she sounded _pissed_. Which was terrifying considering he had only ever heard that tone a handful of times in his life.

“I wasn't there!” _Beto_.

“Yes but you just told me that he told you the minute he got back to the shop! How could you not tell him to call Lance and tell him the truth?” Maria snaps, the sound of pots being shuffled around angrily echoing behind her words.

“What was I supposed to say? Hey call Lance and tell him you lied?”

“Beto you don't even like boys!” Maria nearly screams.

“Lance should've known that!” Beto blurts.

“Keep your voice down, he's upstairs.”

“Whatever.” Beto huffs and then he's running right into Lance, both stumbling back in opposite directions. “Lance?”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why!” Lance cries out, taking a big step forward, grabbing fist fulls of Beto's shirt and shoving forward, both stumbling until Beto collides with the wall. “Why are you and Keith like this?”

“Get off! Ma!”

Several hands are pulling at Lance but his grip doesn't loosen. “What's your goddamn problem!” Lance screeches, pulling Beto away from the wall and slamming him back, vision a bit blurry. “I fucking put up with this for over half my life! I trusted you—you shithead!”

“Lance!”

“Get off! I didn't do shit to you!” Beto has both hands gripping Lance's wrists, nails digging into his skin.

“Lance let go!” it's Milo. At least, Lance thinks it is.

“Fuck you both and everybody in this damn house!” Lance sobs, slamming Beto against the wall once more but with less force. Finally, Milo pulls him away and they both fall off balance. Milo manages to catch the door handle and soften his fall but Lance trips over the sudden tug and he ends up slamming into the dining table before tumbling to the floor. “F-fuck yo-ou guys.” Lance chokes out, laying on his back, palms pressed against both eyes. “Fuck...”

His mom is crying in the doorway, Beto panting but still leaning against the wall and Milo staring between the two of them. Lance stumbles to his feet and his mom reaches out to help him but he slaps her hand away.

“Lance!” Milo calls after him but Lance keeps going, he gets all the way to the front door before Milo pulls him roughly to a stop. “Where are you going?!”

“Fuck off! I'm an ad-dult!” Lance shoves him but Milo is well over twice his size and hardly moves. Yanking the front door open, Lance is outside, barefoot and keys in hand.

“You're not going anywhere in your car! You'll have an accident!” Milo shouts, trying to pull the keys from Lance's grip.

“Let go! Milo let go! It's my car! I pay for that fucking shit—damn it! I'll call the police on you!” Lance threatens, Milo letting go finally and raising his hands in defeat. “Fuck off.” climbing into his car, he slams the door and starts the engine before pulling out without even buckling up. He doesn't have his phone, doesn't have shoes and his tank is only half full but he drives. He drive for two hours before pulling over to fully fill his tank up and then he drives three and a half more hours until it's almost midnight and he's knocking on Hunk's door.

“Lance?” Shay yawns, rubbing sleep from her eyes and stepping aside to let him in. “What brings you out here so.... late?”

“I couldn't breath.”

“That sounds like something you go to the emergency room for.” Shay frowns, closing the door behind Lance and noticing his bare feet. “Where are your shoes?”

“I left in a hurry.” Lance mumbles. “Is Hunk home?”

“Yeah, he's in the room. Do you want some hot chocolate?”

“Yes please.” Lance nods before heading down the hall, the first door leads to the bathroom which leaves the second door as the bedroom. Knocking on the door, Lance walks in and sees Hunk hunched over a keyboard, three different screens showing several codes, one showing a website. “Hunk?”

“Lance!” Hunk shouts, spinning in his seat and jumping to his feet. “What are you doing out here so late?”

“Does Keith hate me?”

“What?”

“Keith. He told me—to my face—that he was dating Beto and I just found out he lied. Why did he do that? Was he trying to hurt me? Was he pissed? Does he just hate me?” Lance's voice sounds like that of a five year old who's just been told he's in major trouble.

“I didn't... know he did that?” Hunk admits, resting a hand on Lance's shoulder. “That's an awful thing to do actually... when did that happen?”

“Yesterday. I called him to meet up and apologize and I... I was gonna give him this letter,” Lance whispers, “I was stupid I realized I liked him, Hunk. I just wasn't in the right place to love him back every time he admitted his feelings to me.”

Hunk is silent for a minute then pulls Lance into a hug. “I'm sorry.”

“Hunk will you be honest with me?”

“Always.”

“Would dating him be bad for me?”

Again, Hunk is silent, but for longer this time. He seems to think it over and then he sighs. “Yes.” he nods, frown on his face. “I care about the both of you but you guys have... how do I word this? You guys...”

“Have put yourselves in a toxic situation.” Shay provides, walking into the room, three mugs held expertly in her hands. Lance and Hunk each take one and then Shay leads Lance to the bed, Hunk pulling his chair up closer.

“Exactly,” Hunk nods. “You guys have forced yourselves into a toxic place, a place where being together would probably be worse for the both of you. Lets take Keith for example first, he's been in love with you basically his _entire_ life Lance. He knows everything about you, he's always had you there and he's always wanted more still. Keith? He hasn't dated anybody before, he has no experience, what's he gonna do when he finally gets you? He's gonna assume that's happiness or he's gonna realize it's not what he's always dreamt it would be and he's gonna regret his whole life.” Hunk explains. “He's obsessed over you for years, I hate to say it but remember Halloween with Nyma? We _stalked_ you Lance. You can't tell me that's an okay thing for us to have done.”

Lance runs a finger around the rim of his mug and shrugs slowly. “You guys were looking out for me.”

“Lance, _listen_ to me. You're forgiving us and looking past these mistakes because you care about us. Put your bias aside, if some random kid decided to follow you the way Keith, Pidge and I did would you be okay with it?” Hunk rephrases. Lance's eyebrows knit together at the question and he shakes his head. “See? Put everything Keith has done into perspective like that. What if it was some other random kid who did it, huh?”

“But it _wasn't_ some random kid. It was somebody I care about—somebody I hurt.” Lance whimpers, Shay patting his back softly.

“Lance, can I ask something?” said person nods, and Shay leans over to set her mug on the bedside dresser. “Why do you think Keith liked you all those years. You personally, why do you think he never gave up?”

Lance mulls the question over and after several minutes of silence he shrugs. “My family? Nyma, my first girlfriend, I dated her for two years and she was the first one to ever point out to me that my family treated Keith like my boyfriend. They all hated her and I don't really know why. My family probably kept his hopes high, especially my Tia Karen. Apparently she talked to him at every get together about me.”

“That right there is your problem. Lance, your family members are the ones trying to push this for you. Are you sure you even have actual feelings for Keith?” Shay questions, Hunk _oohing_ at her words.

“I don't... I don't know? How do I know?” Lance asks sincerely, mug lowering to rest on his knee. “How do you know if you're in love?”

“Your world lights up.” Hunk speaks immediately. “You're willing to lay everything on the line for that one person, your heart flutters, you feel warm inside but mostly you feel happy. A different kind of happy, a selfish kind. One where you put yourself first and your feelings.”

“Oh.” Lance mutters, lifting his mug to take a small sip.

“When did you realize you had feelings for him?”

“On my way home from Australia.” Lance shrugs.

“How do you know? What exactly happened for you to realize that?” Shay eggs him on.

He thinks the question over and frowns. “I was looking through his facebook. I saw him in pictures with my family and several of his statuses were with my family and it just... it seemed natural for him to be there. For my family to love him so much and then I was thinking about his confession at the airport when I left. And how when I called my mom she asked how I could just leave him there like that.” Lance shrugs. “I realized I was stupid after that.”

“I want to get one thing straight,” Hunk starts off, almost angry. “Firstly, you're not stupid. You're far from it! Secondly, what exactly happened at the airport? What did your mom say?”

“He showed up while I was in line to go through TSA.” Lance explains, “And he told me he was still in love with me and that he wasn't trying to stop me from leaving but that he just needed to tell me. He said it like I was moving for the rest of my life or like I was dying.”

“I'm going to be blunt here,” Shay interrupts. “I do _not_ like that. That was an awful lot of pressure to put on you when he could've waited until you returned. You were coming back, not going away forever, it's a bit...”

“Manipulative.” Hunk finishes. “Keith never fully explained what happened that day and the one time I tried to ask you you shut me down.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Lance, don't apologize right now, for anything. If you say the word sorry it better be something like 'Keith better be sorry' or I swear.” Hunk threatens

“Alright.”

“What did your mom say?” Shay questions.

“She asked how I could just leave him screaming like that. She called him a poor boy. She said she hopes I didn't come to regret it one day and then she said good night.”

“That's it?”

“She said dad and her didn't raise me like that.” Lance adds.

Hunk and Shay glance at each other and seem to silently communicate something. “Lance that was manipulative too.” Shay admits in a hesitant tone.

“How?” Lance questions, hot chocolate now forgotten.

“Well by saying that it kind of forced you to think about it for a while after, right?” Hunk starts, “It's kind of like guilt tripping you into thinking about Keith and regretting it. Reverse psychology kind of. By telling you she hopes you _don't_ regret it, you did.”

Lance frowns at the explanation and his shoulders drop. “My mom wouldn't do that, she loves me. She cares about me being happy.”

“No, no don't take it that way. Lance, she loves you but she doesn't realize how she's treating you. None of them do.”

“Why didn't you say something sooner?” Lance whispers.

“I wasn't sure and it wasn't until recently that Shay and I started noticing these things.” Hunk frowns, handing his cup to Shay to set on the night stand. “I'm here for you though, Lance. Whatever happens, both Shay and I are here for you.”

“I think I need to leave.”

“Now? Lance you can sleep here.”

“No, I mean California. I need to leave, I need out. I need to go somewhere away from everybody and just... just focus on me. I need to better myself.” Lance hands Shay his cup too and he smiles at the both of them. “I'll come back but I need out for now.”

“I think that's a great idea.” Shay nods. “And we'll all welcome you back if you ever decide to come back.”

“You need to do what's best for you,” Hunk nods.

**o.O.o**

**This is the way you left me,  
I'm not pretending.  
No hope, no love, no glory,  
No happy ending.**

**o.O.o**

It takes all of two months for Lance to get transfer papers filled out and get relocated to Florida. It's close to where Shiro and Pidge live but it's better than staying in Santa Monica. In those two months Lance manages to avoid most of his family members and Keith especially. Hunk visits three times in those two months and Lance spends overtime at the lab.

On his last day in town Lance is packing things into his car, everything else he owns in a moving truck that the movers would be taking for him.

“Lance?”

“Yeah mom?” he replies, slamming the trunk shut and looking up to see his mom looking distressed. “Are you okay?”

“We need to talk.”

“Alright.”

“I mean everybody. Your father, brothers and sisters. All of us.” she rewords, Lance frowning.

“You guys can't convince me to stay, everything's already filled out and done.” Lance starts but Maria holds up a hand to silence him and shake her head.

“No, we need to apologize to you, come on.” and then Lance is completely confused. Apologize? He doesn't question it, he follows her into the house and sees everybody sitting around together.

“What's... going on?” Lance whispers, glancing at everybody.

“Hunk talked to us.” Mila provides, she's the first to pull Lance into a hug. “I'm so sorry, little bro. I didn't realize we were so... awful to you.”

“I don't... don't apologize.” Lance begs shaking his head.

“We didn't give Nyma a chance.” Chicharo pipes in, hands fiddling in his lap. “We were all quick to judge.”

“Stop.” Lance frantically says.

“We all took Keith's side because we thought you'd both be happy together. We didn't consider what would make _you_ happy.” Maria sounds on the verge of tears and Lance's heart is pounding in his ears.

“Stop, please.”

“Lance, we want you to be happy. We're all sorry about the shit we've put you through.” Beto finally adds and Lance about loses it. A cry escapes his lips and he's shaking his head.

“Shu-ut up!”

Nobody speaks after that, they wait for Lance to calm down and then they each hug him until it turns into family group hug. “It's not your fault, any of you.” Lance says once they all disperse. “I let it happen, I didn't say anything. I led him on, I led you guys on. I let it happen. And I'm not the only one who was affected.”

“Hey, you are _not_ taking the blame for this.” Milo cuts in. “You're the victim here Lance, don't go letting us all off the hook, it's not your fault.”

“You guys don't realize that Keith is the victim here too. I got to date Nyma, I got to date Zoey and other girls. I got to be _happy_ with others and Keith didn't get any of that. He was trapped in a bottomless pit of hope because of everybody.” Lance explains, Maria looking the most guilty of them all. “He has no experience other than with me. He's never even had a crush on somebody other than me. You guys held him back from even small happiness because you gave him hope about me.”

“When you put it that way...” Milo whispers, the others nodding slowly.

“You guys aren't gonna treat Keith any differently are you? I'd never forgive myself if you guys cut him off because of something like this.” Lance frowns, wondering just how Keith would react if he were to lose the McClain family.

“No, if anything we'll encourage him to let go of those feelings for you. Maybe date around, grow emotionally.”

“Why wasn't he invited to... whatever this is?”

“We thought it'd be best if he weren't here.” Maria admits.

**o.O.o**

**2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind  
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around  
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep  
I can think that we just carried on**

**o.O.o**

Laying in bed, Lance stares at his now empty room. Light shining in from the street light through the thin blue curtains and drowning his room in a blue hue. Thinking it over, Lance decides that if several things in his life hadn't happened he and Keith would be on better terms. For one, the Halloween fight while he was dating Nyma. Two, Shiro's wedding night. Three, the day after Shiro's wedding night. Four, the airport incident. Five, the day he apologized and threw away that letter. Six, throwing away that letter.

Reaching over to his nightstand, Lance grabs his phone and clicks it on. One fifty seven. He still had Keith's number saved and he wanted no regrets.

_**Can we put everything behind us? Absolutely everything? Friends again?** _

Lance set his phone back on the nightstand and rolled over, he needed some sleep if he was about to spend all day driving in a few hours.

* * *

 

_**(2:00am) I'd** _ ~~_**love that** _ ~~

_**~~~~~~~~(2:01am) ~~Definitely~~** _

~~~~_**(2:03am)** _ ~~_**Sure** _ _**thing** _ ~~

_**(2:07am) ~~Yeah~~** _

_**(2:13am) Of course. It'll take some time but I hope we can get to friends again.** _

_**(2:13am) Good luck driving, hope you make it to Florida safely, tell Shiro and Pidge I said hi** _

* * *

**  
o.O.o**

**If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well  
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell**

**o.O.o**

“Hey.” Pidge greets once she came into focus on Keith's laptop screen.

“Hey,” he waves back. “I had a question.”

“Shoot.”

Keith hesitates but he pulls out the letter from Lance and holds it up so Pidge could tell what it was. “Lance was going to give this to me but he threw it away after we met up and I still haven't read it. I don't know if I should or just toss it.”

“When did you guys meet up?” Pidge questions.

“Yesterday.”

“Alright, so why'd he throw it away?”

“I kind of told him that I was dating Beto—Pidge don't look at me like that! It was stupid I know and harsh and cruel but it was a spur of the moment kind of thing!” Keith defends, setting the letter down on the couch beside him.

“Well I mean for starters, Beto is straight, isn't he? Unless I didn't get the memo?”

“Oh no, he's straight but I don't think Lance got _that_ memo because he didn't even question it.” Keith frowns. “But you didn't answer my question. Do I open it or not?”

“I dunno Keith, what do you think he wrote in it? His undying love for you? Just toss it.” Pidge shrugs.

Keith pouts at the response as if it wasn't exactly what he was hoping for. “I guess.”

“You know I'm judging you though, right?”

“For what?”

“For that shit thing you did Keith. I know Lance hurt you several times but really? Beto? His brother? It's a little cruel, even for me.” Pidge sighs. “Anyway, I'm heading to bed because I think you forgot I'm three hours ahead of you and I get up early.”

“What— _oh_! Oh yeah, right. Sorry, goodnight Pidge. Tell Shiro and Allura I said hi and the baby too.”

“Will do. Goodnight.”

* * *

Maria was the one to say it wasn't his fault. That it was but it wasn't. That she and the rest of the family were the ones who encouraged his behavior, the ones who hurt both him and Lance. But the moment every awful thing Keith had ever done to Lance was pointed out to him he started beating himself up over it. So much for profusely loving the guy, right?

He hadn't seen Lance in two months, two months since he had lied to his face and Keith still regretted it. What if he hadn't of done that? Would they have made up? Would they have become friends again? Would they have...

Sitting up in bed, Keith looked around his room then slide out of bed and headed to his desk, rummaging through several envelopes before finding the one he was specifically looking for. The letter from Lance had still hadn't read. Ripping it open, Keith nearly pulled out the letter when his phone buzzed. Lance.

Now, Keith wasn't a religious person, but he did believe in signs from the Universe. And this felt like one. Tossing the letter back into the drawer, he shut and tried several times to come up with a decent reply to Lance before finally settling and laying back down. He could move on, he could let it go. He had to.

**o.O.o**

**I feel as if I'm wastin'  
And I'm wastin' everyday**

**o.O.o**

“Hello?”

“Nyma?”

“Lance?”

“Hey.” Lance greeted. “How've you been?”

“Um... pretty good I guess. Why are you calling?”

“I wanted to apologize. I know it's been like... eight years now but you know. We're both adults and the way we ended things was childish. And I'm sorry. You had a point though, my family was awful to you and like I said, I talked it out with them. Well, only recently, a month ago.” Lance laughs lightly, “But I just wanted to call and fix things between us.”

“Oh.” Nyma sounds pleasantly surprised and Lance takes it as a good sign. “That's really impressive, I'll admit I never thought I'd hear hear something like that from you.”

“Yeah, well I mean a lot can change in--”

“ _Naomi!_ No, you put that back down.” Nyma cuts in, surprising Lance. “Sorry... what were you saying?”

“Did you say Naomi?”

“Huh? Oh... oh yeah. I have a daughter.” Nyma replies hesitantly, Lance freezing at the explanation.

“Why Naomi? That's the name I always talked about naming my daughter when I had one.” Lance whispers.

Nyma doesn't respond right away and Lance feels dizzy at the idea he's getting. “I guess the name stuck in my head. It's pretty, just like her.”

“How old is she?”

“Seven.”

“When does she turn eight?”

“December thirty-first.”

Lance drags a hand down his face and lets out a breathy laugh. “Nyma is she...?”

“Don't Lance. Don't.”

“But is she?”

“Lance.”

“Nyma! Is she mine?” Lance's voice cracks and his breathing becomes uneven out of panic. “Is she my daughter?”

“I...” Nyma falls silent and Lance can hear her sniffling. “I think... so?”

“What do you mean _think_?”

“I didn't cheat on you if that's what you think.” Nyma defends. “I just... for your sake I hope not.”

“Why?”

“Lance would your family honestly accept her? They probably still don't want to accept _me_ and I've been raising Naomi on my own for almost eight years now and I'm not about to expose her to a bunch of relatives who wouldn't love her because of who her mother is.”

Lance doesn't accept that as an answer. “I want to know for sure. I'll be damned if my family doesn't love her because I will. You shouldn't have kept this from me.”

It's a month before Lance can get out to Georgia where Nyma moved but the moment he sees Naomi he knows. He knows and he nearly cries. She's got that same shade of brown skin as Lance her hair is the same light brown with a bit of blonde mixed in. Her eyes sparkle a similar shade of dark blue as his own and she's got a single freckle beside her left eye. She bounces on her heels the moment Lance walks into their house and when she smiles Lance can see the missing bottom tooth.

“Naomi, I'd like you to meet my friend Lance.” Nyma introduces, the little girl eagerly holding her hand out to Lance.

“Hello!”

“Hi.” Lance smiles, shaking her hand and looking at Nyma. “You know she is.” Nyma frowns but nods slowly. “Nyma how--”

“Lance in the kitchen please?” he doesn't argue. Naomi sits on the couch and continues to work on some reading homework she has from school while Lance and Nyma head into the kitchen. “Like I said, I couldn't bring myself to expose my daughter to a family who could potentially not love her.” Nyma explains in a hushed tone, the only thing separating the kitchen and living room being a tall counter.

“I know I just... seven years, Nyma. You hid her from me for seven years. I've missed so much, her first step, her first word, her first lose tooth, first day of school. I've missed so much.” Lance whispers, glancing out into the living room.

“I know and I'm sorry. I had my reasons but now what? You'll fight for custody? Take her from me? I don't think so McClain. She's my flesh and blood and I'm keeping her.” Nyma's whispering becomes harsh and Lance knows he wouldn't be able to do the things she's accusing him of.

“No, I wouldn't. Nyma how much do you make? Where do you work? Do you have Welfare?”

“What?”

“Are you financially okay?” Lance shortens. “Do you need help? I want my daughter to have everything.”

“Oh.” Nyma glances to the girl in question and then back to Lance. “What exactly are you offering?”

“Are you happy here in Georgia?”

“Not particularly.”

“Move to Florida with me. I make more than enough.” Lance explains, “She can have both a mom and dad, she can be happy. She can... we can make it work.”

Nyma is silent, her expression unreadable. “Why? What happened to Keith?”

“He's just a friend. Always was, always will be. If you're seeing somebody I understand, I'm just thinking about what's the best for Naomi.”

“Alright.”

“What?”

“Alright, we'll go.” Nyma laughs. “She's always wanted to go to Florida and I've never managed to save up enough to get her there, even for just a weekend.” Nyma goes on, leaning against the kitchen counter. “One time I finally saved up and our tires were slashed so I spent money getting those replaced and it turned out we needed a few other fixes on the car. Another time I finally saved up my mom died and we ended up having to travel out there instead of Florida. It was always something.”

Lance frowns at the story and again looks at the girl and the way she sticks her tongue out while she reads. “I'll pay for everything.”

* * *

“Lance!” his mom greets him in a flurry of kisses and hugs. “Just in time, your old room is still... still...” Maria falls silent when she notices Nyma standing behind Lance, little girl holding her hand. A little girl that's the spitting image of herself. “Is this... Lance?”

“Naomi,” Lance whispers, the little girl perking up at her name being mentioned. “Meet your grandma.”

Maria raises a trembling hand to her lips, tears welling in her eyes. “Mama Maria.” she corrects with a choked laugh. “Call me Mama Maria.”

The little girl grins and nods, hand flying out in greeting. “It's nice to meet you Mama Maria.” Maria wastes no time in bending down and scooping the girl up into a hug filled with tears and choked cries. “Are you okay?”

“J-just fine.” Maria nods, kissing the girls cheek and turning her attention to Nyma. “It's nice to see you again mija,” and Lance notices the shift in the air. Nyma visibly relaxes and a smile graces her lips.

“It's nice to see you again Maria.”

“Come in, come in.” she says as she ushers them in, stepping around them to greet the room full of relatives. “Who wants to meet my new little niece Naomi?” and then she's gone with Lance's daughter. Lance snickers, watching as relatives flock over.

“Her attitude towards me has changed.” Nyma notes, arms crossed over her chest and looking around the room. “She seems more accepting but it might be Naomi.”

“I told you they would love her.”

“Nyma, right?” Tio Beni greets, walking up, hand held out and smile on his face. “We met once a _looong_ time ago but back then I was a little rude.”

“Yes, Nyma, it's alright sir. People change.” Nyma smiles, shaking his hand.

“Yes, that they do.” Beni nods, smiling at Lance warmly. “Naomi is a beautiful little girl, congratulations the both of you.”

The conversation quickly shifts to questions about Nyma's life and about how raising Naomi was. Lance listens in even though he's heard all the stories by this point. But that doesn't stop him from enjoying them again.

They're in town for two days before Keith finally shows up and Lance wastes no time in pulling him into a hug.

“Lance? Are you okay?”

“Peachy.” Lance nods.

“Keith!” Tio Beni greets, coming down the stairs and pulling him into a hug. “It's been a while hasn't it?”

“Sure has.” Keith nods. “Since the Fourth of July.”

“Ah yeah you had that one boy with you, what was his name? Johnny?”

“Jonah.” Keith corrects with a laugh.

“How is he?”

“Didn't work out. We broke it off back in October.” Keith admits, Lance's eyebrows knitting together.

“Wait you mean Jonah from high school?” Lance questions with mock surprise as Keith nods. “He's into guys now? I remember he used to be all 'no homo' in school.” Lance snorts.

“He's bi,” Keith shrugs. “He asked me out after bringing his car in for his tire rotations and we kind of hit it off until last month. Just didn't feel right, you know?” Keith shrugs, Beni snickering to himself.

“How are you and Nyma, Lance?” Beni questions next, Lance shrugging.

“I mean we're living together but not like... _together_. She's been talking with some guy named Rolo and I told her it's fine for her to date. We're not dating, just living together for Naomi's sake and her financial well being.” Lance explains, Beni nodding. “Anyway though,” Lance continues, turning to Keith, “You ready to meet Naomi?”

“From what Shiro has said she's just as energetic as you so... yeah, I think I'm beyond ready.” Keith nods. Beni gives a small wave and moves to sit on the couch as they head into the kitchen where Chicharo is reading a story book with Naomi and Lance notices the smile that quickly forms on Keith's face.

“She looks just like you... or your mom.”

“Everybody says that,” Lance chuckles, moving to ruffle his daughter’s hair. “Say hi Naomi, this is your Uncle Keith.”

“Uncle.” Keith repeats and lance worries for a second that Keith will argue. “It's weird hearing you say Uncle instead of Tio,” he laughs.

“I can call you Tio if you want!” Naomi quickly perks up. “I call the others Tio and Tia's except Chicharo, he says to just call him by his name because he doesn't wanna feel old yet.”

Lance and Keith both laugh at the explanation but Keith shakes his head. “Either is fine. Whatever you're comfortable with.”

“I'll use both then! Sometimes Tio Milo says to call him Uncle too. Only when Aunt Vanessa is around though.” she chatters. “Are you my dads brother? You don't look like him. Or are you a close family friend just like Uncle Shiro and Aunt Allura and Aunt Pidge?”

“You sure know how to talk a head off don't you?” Keith teases, pulling out the chair beside her and sitting down. “I'm a close family friend. I'm Shiro's brother actually.”

“I think that makes sense.” Naomi nods, turning to her dad and lowering her head. “Dad can I have another?”

“Are you gonna eat your dinner when Mama Maria and Mom come home?” Lance questions and the girl nods eagerly.

“Alright.” Lance agrees, heading into the kitchen, Keith following behind him.

“Shiro wasn't lying when he said she was cute.”

“I mean... she _is_ related to me.” Lance jokes, opening the cookie jar and placing one into a napkin. “This is nice, you know?”

“Having a daughter?” Keith questions with furrowed eyebrows.

“No, this. Us, being friends again.” Lance corrects, licking his lips and smiling. “I hate to bring it up but you know we wouldn't have worked out together. Not then at least, not after what had gone down and where we were in life.”

“I know. I messed up a lot, it wasn't just on you.” Keith admits, grabbing a cookie for himself. “But in all honesty do you think we could fix our relat—friendship? Get back to where we were when we were kids and teens. Happy and comfortable together?”

Lance thinks the question over, chewing on his bottom lip before finally nodding. “I think so, I think we could get there again someday. Maybe even... maybe we could even work past that too.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” Lance laughs.

“Oh... I mean, I guess time will tell, right?” Keith laughs, Lance leaning forward and swinging an arm over Keith's shoulders.

“Time will sure tell,” he nods, leading the both of them forward. “Now come on, my little girl wants a cookie and who am I to not spoil her rotten after missing almost eight years of her life?”

**o.O.o**

**This is the way that we love,  
Like it's forever.  
To live the rest of our life,  
But not together.**

**o.O.o**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw Keith never did read the letter but he still has it. From here you can make up any ending you'd like. Maybe they get together 5 years down the road and Keith goes from Uncle to dad for Naomi. Nyma ends up with Rolo. Or maybe Keith stays cle and tan Unhey at least repair their friendship or maybe they fall apart and never talk again. This was an ending that would technically satisfy everybody imo because everybody gets the ending they wanted. 
> 
> Anyway, huge thank you for reading this to the end guys, it means a lot to me. And I hope you guys continue to enjoy some of my other works. And if you want some cute and fluffy klance I'd recommend reading my other fic [Kiss My Ice](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8541916/chapters/19582732) because it's ice skater Lance? Cute Klance? They have good communication? Already dating? It's got like 34.1k words? I'd recommend it for sure.
> 
> And seriously, major thanks to everybody who's been here from the start or half way or even just after it ended. No matter what point you joined in, you read till the end and that means the world to me. Thank you! <3

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr at [bluemcclain ](http://bluemcclain.tumblr.com) if you have any questions or requests, I do take writing requests!
> 
> Other fics I've written or plan on writing can be found here: [bluemcclain ](http://bluemcclain.tumblr.com/schedule)


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